Aug. 22, 2018
Want to be the Gutsy Girl Who GOES for It and GETS It?

Though women have made strides in business and leadership, there is still much room for growth and improvement. Women need other successful women who inspire and show them the way. Good news, ladies! Help is in this jam-packed episode with Kate White...
Though women have made strides in business and leadership, there is still much room for growth and improvement. Women need other successful women who inspire and show them the way. Good news, ladies! Help is in this jam-packed episode with Kate White who has forged a gorgeously “gutsy” life and career and is here to tell us how we can, too.
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There are some people that make their
work just another thing they have to do,
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and there are those that make their
work something that they want to do.
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Welcome to Working on Purpose with your
host Elise Cortes. In our program,
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we provide guidance and inspiration from those
people who have found deeper meaning and
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personal connection to their work life.
It's beyond nine to five. It's working
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on purpose. Now Here is your
host, Elise Cortes. I'm your host,
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Elise Cortes, joining from Dallas,
Texas, which is home base for
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me. This program is all about
helping people more meaningfully and productively connect with
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their work and equipping leaders and organizations
to cultivate meeting and purpose within those organizations.
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I bring on guests to have a
particular perspective or experience that I think
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contributes to work. Spans this conversation, and as a management consultant and social
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scientist, I draw into meeting and
work research I've been doing over the last
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fifteen years, as well as from
my own consulting speaker and experience developing workforces
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across the globe. Last week,
if you missed the live show, you
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can always catch it be recorded podcast. We were on The Doctor Joy Martina,
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author of How to Use Your Intuition
to Change Your Life. She gave
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us many pearls of wisdom from her
years of research, inquiry, and practice
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helping business leaders and celebrities developed their
intuitive intelligence. It was a fascinating conversation.
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A I learned a ton with us
this week is Kate White, the
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New York Times best selling author of
twelve murder mysteries and thrillers and several popular
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career books, including the Gutsy Girl
handbook, Your Manifesto for Success, based
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on her groundbreaking bestseller Why Good Girls
Don't Get It Ahead, But Gutsy Girls
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Do. For fourteen years, Kate
was the editor in chief of the Cosmopolitan
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magazine, where she increased overall circulation
by thirty percent and made Cosmo the number
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one magazine in the US in single
copy sales. Today, we're here to
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talk about how women can learn from
her years of experience asigotzea woman in the
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business world, now what she's learned
from many others along the way. She
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joins today from New York City.
Kate, Welcome to working on per Thank
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you, Elise. I am so
happy to have you and thrilled you came
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into my path. Oh my gosh, I'm going to learn a ton from
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you, and I just love the
idea of celebrating who you are and what
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you've done in the world with all
of our listeners. Kates, So thank
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you for being with us. It's
great. So I want to start by
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situating why. One of the reasons
I wanted to have you on the show
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is I do a lot of work
coaching women across the globe as they developed
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their careers and certainly as they developed
their leadership. And as you say in
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your book so eloquently, we've come
a long way, but really just not
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enough. So can you start by
giving us some status about women in the
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workplace? And I mean, I'm
generally pretty positive about things and pretty optimistic,
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but what you have in the book
is still kind of dismal. Where
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are we well? I had to
use the word dismal because certainly, just
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as you sat, at least we've
come so far. When I was first
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in New York in the seventies,
I applied at Newsweek magazine for a job
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because I wanted to be in journalism, and I was told, look,
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you can only get so far because
women are not allowed to become editors here,
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and it took a lawsuit by some
brave women who worked at Newsweek to
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change that. So things are so
different, but still according to one of
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the surveys from Lean in the Sheryl
Sandberg Company, they looked at eighteen thousand
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jobs and they found that women earned
ninety two cents on the dollar compared to
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men, but when women entered management, that dropped to eighty three cents,
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So you still see a discrepancy there. And one of the stats that really
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bugged me was the fact of and
this came from Catalysts, that the women
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account for forty four percent of all
employees at SMP companies SMP five hundred companies,
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they account for just twenty five percent
of people of twenty five percent of
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management. And I think this stat
that really slew me was was one involving
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of Beyonce. There's that great song
where Beyonce talks about girls running the world.
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But the company that creates and markets
her Fragrance, until recently had no
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women on its executive in its executive
ranks or its board. And they finally
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added one person because I think that
stack got out there. So we still
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do have our work to do,
for sure, m h. And of
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course part of what I stand for
there on that Kate, for sure is
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I think that part of it,
not all of it, not even close
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to all of it. Part of
it is that I think that workplaces are
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not compelling for a lot of women. It's not interesting for they how they
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experience work. And of course I'm
out to be able to help companies elicit
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more meaning and purpose, make it
a better place for everyone to enjoy themselves
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and grow and thrive. But we
won't talk about that in this episode.
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I want to talk about what you
have learned and what you have, what
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you can share about your background,
your experience and all these branch you had
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writing books. So one of the
things I want to ask, and I
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just love your whole career case,
it's just so inspiring. But I want
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to talk about how you have been
able to apply that the Gutzy Girl principles
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you talk about in your book.
You have nine of them in there,
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I believe, but it's to the
extent that we can sure at least some
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of them on the show with our
listeners. It would be great if you
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could just say a little bit about
how you've used some of those to be
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able to do some of the amazing
things that you've done a chief of Red
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Book, editor in chief of Cosmopolitan, writing twelve books. It's impressive.
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Well, I think for me,
some of it has been unleashing those gutsy
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girl instincts that were there when I
was growing up but got tamped down at
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times because I, like a lot
of women, there are moments where I
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feel, oh, I don't want
to rock the boat here. I don't
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want to step into a pubble with
my party shoes on. And so it
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was really trying to let some of
those onferral, and also at certain situations
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stepping back and saying, Okay,
this isn't working. What do I have
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to do to make a change here. There was one point where I was
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the number two at a magazine,
just a small Sunday supplement magazine, and
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I was up for the number one
job after my boss left and I ran
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the magazine for three months while they
conduct a search for his successor, and
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I threw my hat in the ring, or was told your hat's in the
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ring, and I didn't get the
job, And later my boss, who
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had gone on to run GQ,
took me aside and he said, I
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heard that your proposal was the best
and you didn't get the job because you
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were a woman. And that was
a moment where I probably could have cried
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into my beer, but I said, you know what I'm going to do.
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I'm going to go back into women's
magazines and I'm not going to end
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up having that hurdle in front of
me. So probably for me, I
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would say what's helped me the most
is the ability sometimes to step back and
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look at the landscape and say,
Okay, here's what I've got to do
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differently. Always I've been good about
asking for what I want, because if
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you don't ask, you're not going
to get it. And one part,
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just one last thing, I would
say, a big part to me of
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gutsiness is not being afraid to show
your passion. Passion is really contagious.
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And once when I got a job
as the energy for Red Book, that
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headhunter told me later, Kate,
don't change, and I said, what
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do you mean by that? And
he said, so many people who applied
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for top jobs feel they have to
be buttoned up, and you just wore
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your heart on your sleeve about how
much you wanted that job, and that
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is a winning formula, and I
wish I could teach that to other people.
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So that's I think that's been a
big part of my success is not
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being afraid to even seem a little
corny sometimes about how much I want something
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and how much I'd like to bring
to it. Oh that's so beautiful,
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Kate, And thank you for a
couple of things. One using the word
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unleashing your gutsy girl instincts. I
use that word a lot. And two
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I do a lot of coaching with
women, and women are You're right?
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Are more and more so buttoned up
in the workplace, And I tell them,
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please show your authenticity. Let us
see what inspires you, what brings
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you to life, and what is
your purpose because that is irresistible to people,
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and they're like, really, are
you sure? And they don't believe
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me. So if they don't believe
me, then we'll let them believe you.
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Alisa, I once got a letter
from a girl who wants to be
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an Internet Cosmo, and she had
this line in the letter that she had
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me at this line because she said, I can still remember being fifteen and
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reading Cosmos in as I lay on
my bed in unmatched pajamas, and I
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thought, Wow, what an authentic
moment. I could picture her on her
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bed in those unmatched pajamas, and
I just love everything that was so authentic
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about her letter. Don't be afraid
to show that, don't be afraid to
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wear your heart on your sleeve.
I am completely completely with you, and
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we want to encour get that message
out there more writ large. And you
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are a good person to speak that, Kate, So thank you. Okay,
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Well, let's talk about some of
those rules. I like in this
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show, Kate, to give our
listeners as much information that they can actually
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walk away and use as we possibly
can while they get to know you and
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what you're about. So one of
the rules, the first one that you
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talk about in the book is I
got to girl breaks the rules. So
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would you say a bit more about
that. What do you mean by breaking
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the rules? Sometimes to stand out
from the pack, you have to do
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things a little differently. This is
such an old example, but when I
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was a senior in college, my
college picked me to enter Glamour Magazine's Top
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ten College Woman contest, and I
really wanted to win because I thought it
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would be an entree to the publishing
world. In New York and the part
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of the entry was writing an essay
about your goals for the future, and
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I decided to write an ast say
about why I had no goals for the
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future. And of course I circle
back in the piece and I did have
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goals, but I know that essay
helped me to win and I ended up
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being on the cover and that was
my entry into magazines. So sometimes you
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just have to look at things a
little bit differently. Once you're in a
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job, it's really important to know
that it's not enough to do things anymore
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just what you've been told to do, and to do them really well.
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You've got to come up with bold, innovative, sometimes disruptive ideas for your
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boss, for your department, for
your company, and not just follow the
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rules. And that may be simply, let's say your boss asks you to
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prontounce some numbers and run some numbers
and do an analysis, a very simple
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analysis. But as you're doing that
analysis, you see a pattern. And
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you haven't been told to look for
a pattern, but you see a pattern.
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And in terms of let's say sales
in California, to put a top
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memo on that and that running of
the numbers you did where you say.
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While I was doing this, I
happen to see a really interesting trend in
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California. Wouldn't it be terrific if
we did such and such and try to
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leverage that That's not what you've been
told to do, but it tells your
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boss that you are a gutsy thinker
and you're going to go beyond your job
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description. True value added, Kate. I also teach here at Southern Methodis
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University, so I work with a
lot of young students who are just entering
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their careers, and I often tell
them just that exan exact advice. Go
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look for what you see and offer
it, give it. And what I'm
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finding is that the younger generation especially
seems a little more reticent. And maybe
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that's just because they haven't been much
experience in the world, but they're like,
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are you sure if that's okay?
Are you yes? It's better than
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okay. So many of my wonderful
staffers, initially they didn't know how to
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do that. Often I knew something
I called the four bes. It's a
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great little tool that I found helped
me a lot. At COSMO. I
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would ask myself about any event I
was planning any idea. I was working
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on these four bees? Could it
be better? Could it be bigger?
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Could it be bolder? Could it
be more badass? And I that her
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ways to blow it up and move
out color outside the lines with it.
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Often that's where you get the idea
that's different than the same old way you've
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always done it before. M hm. And I like how you bring that
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to life in your book too,
because I caught that too. Love that.
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Okay, well let's go into rule
number two and you've already kind of
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alluded to it, But I just
love how in your book you just really
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just bring it out there and you
say, I got to girl decides what
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she wants to be famous for and
then she goes for it fearlessly. I
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love that. But how do we
pull that off? Well, I'm a
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big believer, even though it's become
a little cliche these days, that it's
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great to be aware of what you're
personal professional brand is, what is your
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specialty? How do you define it? And it makes it easier for you
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to know what to say yes to, what to say no for, to
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what to go after. And it's
really fun to think about your brand.
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And one of the little exer sizes. I given the book that I was
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helped by with by a wonderful woman
who does brand strategy for BMW group is
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to just take eight or nine words
that you think really define your specialty,
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then try to get it down to
three words and then try to create it
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into a sentence or a statement,
almost like a bumper sticker. And for
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me, when I was doing my
public speaking in the beginning, I started
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to think that maybe mine could become
I'm the authority on gutsy big bold gutsy
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career, or something to that effect. So you're really just giving yourself something
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a statement that you can refer back
to. At Cosmo, our brand statement
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was Funfareless Female, and that was
such a great tool for me because it
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allowed me to look at everything we
were considering every project and say, jee,
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I like this, but is this
too earnest? Is it not enough?
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Fun fare Less Female? So,
if you've got your brand statement down,
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and it can shift over time,
for sure, because everything changes,
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but if you get your brand statement
down, it really allows you to hold
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stuff up against it and evaluate whether
it's going to reinforce your brand when you
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make that choice or follow that path, or it's going to fight it.
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Mm hmm. I love that that. I like just that isolating it down
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like that. I have to work
on that yet for myself. But we
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got time for one more rule before
we have to go on a quick break
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here, and I love this one
and I want you to know Kate that
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thanks to you and reading your book, I actually have a sticky of this
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next one. Rule number three,
girl knows how to hustle. So I've
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got this sticky that says hustle.
So tell us about hustle. Oh,
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to me, hustle is just figuring
out what your priorities are and just going
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for them, working your schedule,
dumping what doesn't matter, delegating, ignoring
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what you can just totally ignore,
and only focusing on what's important. Be
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a ball or look for openings,
go after what really matters, and leave
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the rest behind. Yeah. I
love your whole section on delegating unapologetically because
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a lot of the women that I
do work with as I coach them,
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really struggle with that because they feel
like, I don't want to dump this
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on somebody, or is it fair
to ask, or it's just unapologetically really
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got me. Yes, And one
of the things that this wonderful woman Julia
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Morgenstern, who's a time management expert, mentioned in the book when I interviewed
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her, is that we take sometimes
women take a lot of satisfaction out of
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being the girl who does everything,
so that when something gets dumped on your
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desk and saying, gee, Bob, I'd love to help, but I'm
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focusing on this right now. You
feel like I want to show Bob I
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can do it. I want to
show them a team player. I want
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to show I can do everything.
That's a good girl instinct. YEP,
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I understand that, and we want
to get to the bottom of that and
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start changing course. And on that
note, Kate, let's take our first
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break. I'm your host, Alis
Cortes. We've been on the air with
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Kate White, the New York Times
bestselling author of twelve murder mysteries and thrillers
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and several popular career books, including
the Gutsy Girl handbook, Your Manifesto for
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Success, based on her groundbreaking bestseller
Why Good Girls Don't Get Ahead, But
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Gutsy Girls Do. She joins today
from New York City. We've been talking
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a bit about some of the rules
and how she's gotten to where she is
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in life after the break, will
continue on with some more of those rules.
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Stay with us, We'll be right
back. Elise Cortes is a speaker
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and engagement and development catalyst. She
designs and delivers professional development, leadership and
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00:17:07.559 --> 00:17:11.400
engagement workshops and can bring her expertise
to your organization. She will help ignite
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00:17:11.440 --> 00:17:17.920
meaningful development within your workforce that will
increase employee engagement, performance and retention.
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00:17:18.240 --> 00:17:22.200
To learn more or to invite Elise
to speak to your organization, please visit
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00:17:22.240 --> 00:17:26.839
her at www dot elisecortes dot com. She would welcome the opportunity to help
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get your employees working on purpose.
This is working on purpose with Elise Cortes.
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To reach our program today, send
an email to a lease Alic at
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00:17:45.160 --> 00:17:52.079
elisecortes dot com. Now back to
working on purpose if you're just joining us.
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My guest is Kate White, the
New York Times bestselling author of twelve
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murder mysteries and thrillers, in several
popular career books, including the Gutsygirl hand
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Book Your Manifesto for Success, based
on her groundbreaking bestseller Why Good Girls Don't
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Get Ahead But Gotsy Girls Do.
For fourteen years, Kate was the editor
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in chief of Cosmopolitan magazine, where
she increased overall circulation by thirty percent and
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made Cosmo the number one magazine in
the US and single copy sales. We've
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been talking about about her own life, her own experience developing your career,
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and also some of the rules she
wrote about in her book. Now we're
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going to continue on some more of
those rules that I think could be useful.
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So, Kate, one of the
things that you talk about in your
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book that I thought was especially pointing
it and something that we women oftentimes don't
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like to talk about. Who that
is You say that Gatsi girl gets that
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appearances matter, whether that's fair or
not. And you've got a whole section
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on how women ought to maybe consider
dressing for success, including developing a signature
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look, hairstyles, all kinds of
things tell us a little bit about that
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particular role. It does seem unfair, doesn't it, because we ought to
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judge for our skills and our expertise
and our experience. But we are human
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beings and we judge on appearance.
And studies show that, as you probably
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know from your coaching, the decision
not to hire is often made within the
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first five to ten minutes and what
are they basing that on. They're basing
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it on how you're coming across visually. First and foremost, you need to
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dress for the job you aspire to. There's no way around that. And
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once you are in your company,
you need to be dressing for the next
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job that you want so that your
boss can see you in that role when
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that opens up for when you go
after it. And just as important as
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dressing for the job you aspire to
is speaking for the job you aspire to.
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You have to learn to take command
in a meeting and present yourself with
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as much confidence as possible. I
have heard so many women, and I've
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been there my out in meetings pitch
an idea with phrases like maybe we should
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or I'm just spitballing here, or
this probably isn't a good idea. But
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you have to learn to walk into
that room, choose a good seat at
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the table, gain the floor,
and present your idea with confidence and without
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fillers like oh or ah, So
that speaking is as much a part of
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your whole sort of appearance as your
dress is. Kate, that is such
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a great point. I just was
working a few months ago with a woman
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who had been told by her boss, look, you got to speak up
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more in the meetings. People don't
even know who you are, and yet
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you have plenty to share. And
he said, moreover, I want you
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to develop your career here, and
you can't just stay in the same role
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that you're in. And so he
hired me for her, and we worked
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on just that thing. Okay,
Yeah, we worked. He is a
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great boss. I so commend him. And you know what happened is not
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very long after he he hired me
for her, he got promoted and we
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talked and I talked about her applying
for his job. And of course we
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talked about that for a couple of
weeks or so, we got her ready
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for it. She applied for it, and the great story is she got
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the job. Can I just ask
you, what was the best tip you
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gave her for presenting herself better in
meetings? Yeah? What I told her
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was a couple of things. She's
she's quiet by nature, so she's she
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tends to want to take in information
like a lot of people. She's an
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engineer and so she does take in
a lot of data. So what I
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what I told her. One of
the things I told her I said,
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you've got to go and ready to
share something. You have a whole wealth
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of knowledge that you can draw from
because of your experience and your education.
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To go and ready to be able
to draw something from your every day that
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you already know that you know will
be useful. But prepare for that in
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evance, because you're going to need
to prepare for that and it'll make you
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feel more comfortable. But have it
at the ready. You have a few
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things at the ready, and then
you know, be be willing to be
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a little uncomfortable and put yourself out
there right. A lot of people don't
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realize how prepping before a meeting is
so important. They were waiting for the
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meeting to unfold. But you've got
to gain the meeting in advance. Take
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us take some time to look at
the players and guess what their agenda is
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going to be, and go and
prepared absolutely, and yeah, absolutely,
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And to that end, on one
of the other things you talk about in
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the book, one of the other
rules, and you've already kind of mentioned
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it, but it was so important
when she when she was going through the
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interview process, and that is asking
for what we want. You know,
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she wasn't she said, I don't
know what I should ask for, and
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I don't know what I want just
yet. I said, well, you
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got to get really clear about that, but you said it earlier. But
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my daughter, when my daughter was
five, Kate, she came home from
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camp one day and she just said, so matter of fact, you don't
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ask, you don't get. And
I just right, I mean that from
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the mouth of babes. And I
just thought if more of us women could
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get that early on in life and
then live it, how much different our
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lives might be. So true,
And today I actually think women have come
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to see how important asking is.
When I did the first book Why Good
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Girls Don't Get Ahead, twenty three
years ago, and I would mention the
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importance of asking in a talk I
was giving, I would see women nod
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their heads as if a light bulb
had gone off. Yeah, yeah,
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no, I need to do that. Today women know that, but because
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it makes them so uncomfortable, I
see them talking themselves out of it.
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They'll think, now it's not a
good time, or they don't have the
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money for it, or if they
know I want it, so I don't
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have to ask. You have to
ask. Just as your daughter said,
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you don't ask, you don't get, and you have to ask for opportunities
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too, not just money. There
was a study lately from Hastings School of
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Law that said that women and people
of color are far less likely to be
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given the kind of glamour jobs that
lead to promotions, like representing the company
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in an industry fan or working with
a client on a new project. So
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you've got to raise your hand for
them. You've got to go into your
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boss and say, hey, I
hear this, this is going to be
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happening. I'd loved you to think
of me for this, absolutely. And
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I don't know what it is about
us. I don't know if it is
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that we're afraid of what we want, or if we've been conditioned somehow culturally.
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I don't know, but there is
something about that and I want to
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share just really quick. A few
years ago I went through a program called
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Leadership Women in the Leadership of America
here in Dallas, a great program.
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Love what they're up to. And
I was in that program with a very
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very wicked, smart woman as she
has a PhD in astronomy and anyway,
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sitting there on the bus, she
was sitting there looking and hearing about all
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other women that she'd met, and
she got really inspired and she said,
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darn it, that's it. I'm
just going to do it. And I'm
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like, what what are you going
to do? Are we going to roub
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a bank? What are we doing? And she goes, I'm going to
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put my name on the hat to
be chair of my department, and she
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said, I put it off,
and I keep saying I'm not going to
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do it because I've got young children, I'm busy and all of this and
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all that and all that. I'm
just going to do it. And Kate,
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she put her name in a hat. She's the first female chair of
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the University of Austin to Texas and
she did it. I love that story.
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Yeah, it's wonderful. I'm so
proud of her and she's just kicking
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it. But it did take asking
for what she wanted, putting herself out
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there. Yes, and if you're
not sure what you want, like that
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person you referenced, you just have
to say, I'm going to take some
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time to try to figure out what
it is. And because if I don't
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have clarity, I haven't thought about
my goals and my needs clearly enough.
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Mm hmmm. I think that's so
great, right, really spending some time
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really getting clear and riveting on what
it is that we want for ourselves in
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our lives. Well, I do
want to talk a little bit more about
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money, if you don't mind.
It's something that I think a lot of
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women really struggle with. And we've
already said that. You said ninety two
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cents on the dollar. At least
that's I remember a figure years ago that
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was seventy eight cents on the dollar. So I guess we really are making
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progress. But how do you counsel
women to ask for money or other valuable
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perks when they're out and about going
for what they want. Well, first
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of all, having been a boss
many places, I let them know that
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companies are often low balling, and
that's just a given. Because they're leaving
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money to negotiate with, they often
expect negotiation, So you have to know
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that. And when you are applying
for a job and you get the offer,
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you do not accept the amount that
they offer, even if it meets
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what your expectations were, because you
could be leaving money on the table and
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you want to read the room.
You want to get a sense of the
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best way to approach a negotiation with
that particular person. But I'm a big
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believer in just being gracious and saying
something like, Janet, I am thrilled
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to get off of this job.
I loved interviewing with you. I've loved
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everything you've told me about the company. I could bring so much here,
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but I was hoping for eighty thousand. Can we make that happen? And
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I know sometimes I would get a
little irritated with people who were gutsy enough
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to negotiate, but when they came
in and performed, all was forgotten.
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And you cannot hesitate to do that. And you can also negotiate for raises
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your boss. If you raise it
disappoints you, it may be because there's
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only so much in the pool.
Then say, all right, well,
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what about another week of vacation,
what about a title change? What about
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the opportunity to revisit this in six
months when the budget opens up. It's
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scary to do it first, but
the more you do it, the more
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you'll find it so much easier to
do over time. And I think the
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way that you just gave us that
the entre to be able to speak it
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that way, you know, being
gracious about it. Kate was just great.
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I think that's just such a great
example that women can use as maybe
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a bit of a template to be
able to draw from. Yes, I
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just I've seen a couple of studies
like I think there's a Cheryl Sandberg one
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that says that when women do this
or seeing this bossy and I hate studies
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like that because they make it they
almost discourage us from doing it. Well,
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there's a way to do it without
sounding overly assertive or bossy. Just
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keep emotion on your voice and be
gracious and ideally they're going to look at
404
00:28:37.680 --> 00:28:41.880
you as someone who just values yourself
and your experience. Mm hmm, I
405
00:28:41.920 --> 00:28:45.920
love that. That's beautiful, Kate, gorgeous. That was worth the price
406
00:28:45.960 --> 00:28:51.680
of emission right there, for sure? True? No pun intended, right,
407
00:28:51.759 --> 00:28:55.680
no pun intended. Okay, Well, let's go on to smart risks.
408
00:28:55.759 --> 00:28:59.400
You've got a whole rule here about
gutsy girls taking smart risks. So
409
00:28:59.519 --> 00:29:03.519
first I want us to distinguish what
you mean by smart risks, and then
410
00:29:03.559 --> 00:29:04.759
we can talk about you know,
really, how does that rule show up
411
00:29:04.799 --> 00:29:10.640
for us in the workforce today?
We have to not only embrace change,
412
00:29:10.759 --> 00:29:15.480
we have to create change. We
have to be disruptors. I love this
413
00:29:15.640 --> 00:29:18.079
quote and I mentioned in the book
of Ursula Burns, who used to be
414
00:29:18.160 --> 00:29:22.519
head of Xerox. She said she
loved people who fix things before they were
415
00:29:22.559 --> 00:29:27.079
broken. We have to have our
ear to the ground and know that there's
416
00:29:27.279 --> 00:29:33.119
time to shift and things move quickly. But you don't want to take stupid
417
00:29:33.279 --> 00:29:37.960
risks, And there are questions to
ask yourself to help guide you, like
418
00:29:40.039 --> 00:29:45.000
what are the potential benefits, what
is the potential harm, how probable is
419
00:29:45.000 --> 00:29:49.480
that harm? How much can I
afford to lose? And it's important to
420
00:29:49.599 --> 00:29:55.079
run through those questions with yourself so
you don't do a risk just because it
421
00:29:55.119 --> 00:29:59.759
looks cool and it sounds good.
You need to do that evaluation for every
422
00:29:59.759 --> 00:30:03.960
big risk. And another good question
is how I feel if a competitor does
423
00:30:03.000 --> 00:30:07.240
this. And all those things help
guide you to an answer that says,
424
00:30:07.279 --> 00:30:10.480
look, I don't have a lot
to lose, but I've got a lot
425
00:30:10.519 --> 00:30:15.240
to gain. Let me go for
it, or maybe not. You are
426
00:30:15.279 --> 00:30:18.680
so reminding me of the conversation we
had on air last week Ky that was
427
00:30:18.720 --> 00:30:25.359
with doctor Joey Martina, and we
were talking about the intelligence of intuition and
428
00:30:25.400 --> 00:30:27.960
how that factored into how we make
decisions and how we take in data and
429
00:30:29.000 --> 00:30:30.799
what we do with that information.
So it seems to me that there is
430
00:30:30.799 --> 00:30:34.720
an element of what you're talking about
about smart risks that does involve intuition.
431
00:30:36.119 --> 00:30:38.279
Yes. No, Yes. In
fact, I heard you mentioned her and
432
00:30:38.319 --> 00:30:41.599
I was thinking, God, I'm
going to go back and listen to that.
433
00:30:41.039 --> 00:30:45.839
I'm a big believer in gut,
but I would explain it a little
434
00:30:45.880 --> 00:30:49.480
differently for myself. I believe in
the educated gut. Part of why I
435
00:30:49.559 --> 00:30:53.160
was able to take Cosmo to number
one in newsstand sales and keep it there
436
00:30:53.240 --> 00:31:00.359
my fourteen years and increase circulation by
thirty percent was because I researched the hell
437
00:31:00.440 --> 00:31:04.599
out of my reader. I did
focus groups, I rated every single thing
438
00:31:04.640 --> 00:31:11.279
in the magazine, and it's that
kind of research that gives you an idea,
439
00:31:11.200 --> 00:31:15.160
that fills your gut with information,
so when you go to make a
440
00:31:15.160 --> 00:31:21.039
decision, it's based on knowledge.
One of my funniest moments was not long
441
00:31:21.039 --> 00:31:23.000
after I started, I took some
covers out to a shopping mall. I
442
00:31:23.039 --> 00:31:26.480
happened to be out of town.
I thought, what the heck. I
443
00:31:26.519 --> 00:31:27.839
took them out, and I asked
these women. I went up to them,
444
00:31:27.880 --> 00:31:30.559
I said, I'm the out of
Cosmo. I'm sure they thought I'd
445
00:31:30.640 --> 00:31:37.039
just gotten out of an insane asylum
doing this in the mall. But I
446
00:31:37.119 --> 00:31:41.079
said, can you tell me which
of these covers do you like the best?
447
00:31:41.559 --> 00:31:45.759
And almost every single woman said to
me, what season is it?
448
00:31:47.480 --> 00:31:52.119
And I knew the clothes had to
be absolutely right for the season. I
449
00:31:52.160 --> 00:31:57.119
didn't think that was as essential on
Cosmo covers because we weren't strictly a fashion
450
00:31:57.160 --> 00:32:04.119
magazine make good gut decisions about what
clothes to put on the cover, but
451
00:32:04.160 --> 00:32:09.920
they based on information that I gathered
from my research. Well, I certainly
452
00:32:10.000 --> 00:32:13.839
have been a research scal much of
my life, so that's a music to
453
00:32:13.880 --> 00:32:16.119
my ears. And I can also
understand why that would also give you a
454
00:32:16.200 --> 00:32:20.519
really strong platform to work from in
order to take those smart risks. That
455
00:32:20.559 --> 00:32:24.279
makes a ton of sense to me, A ton of sense. Definitely awesome.
456
00:32:24.319 --> 00:32:27.559
I love the fact too, that
you would go into malls and actually
457
00:32:27.640 --> 00:32:30.680
just query people what do you think? I love that talk about gutsy that's
458
00:32:30.720 --> 00:32:36.680
just fun. Yeah. Crazy woman
at the Crossgates mall called the police,
459
00:32:36.839 --> 00:32:43.039
call security exactly, but before they
arrived Kennabbott, ask you a few questions
460
00:32:43.079 --> 00:32:49.359
and I'd be well along that line. Really kind of one of the things
461
00:32:49.359 --> 00:32:52.799
that presence for me when you talked
about that is, you know, it
462
00:32:52.839 --> 00:32:55.640
seems to me like you're you are
fearless, you don't care what people think.
463
00:32:57.200 --> 00:33:02.119
And there's this whole thing about about
women being sensitive to people wanting people
464
00:33:02.160 --> 00:33:06.200
liking them. They want to be
liked, and so you have something in
465
00:33:06.240 --> 00:33:08.640
your book about rule number seven.
A gutsy girl doesn't need all the likes.
466
00:33:09.000 --> 00:33:12.680
So the first thing I want to
talk about is why do do you
467
00:33:12.759 --> 00:33:15.599
think that women do feel so strong
that they must be liked? What's behind
468
00:33:15.599 --> 00:33:22.319
that? Well, I'm not a
scientist, but I know from reading that
469
00:33:23.079 --> 00:33:32.000
we are hardwired to want to collaborate. We are mothers and nurturers, and
470
00:33:32.680 --> 00:33:40.759
relationships are important to us and that's
lovely. But let me just also say
471
00:33:42.119 --> 00:33:47.359
being liked at work is really powerful. I'm a big believer in being a
472
00:33:47.480 --> 00:33:53.200
charismatic boss. Look at the people
who have won the presidency over the last
473
00:33:54.000 --> 00:34:04.599
fifty years. It's the careismatic George
Bush's John Kennedy, those people who end
474
00:34:04.680 --> 00:34:10.039
up winning over the ones who are
stiff and uncharismatic. I really believe in
475
00:34:10.280 --> 00:34:14.679
the power of charisma and how important
it is to be liked, and I
476
00:34:14.679 --> 00:34:19.480
think that inspires people. But not
everybody's going to like you. There's going
477
00:34:19.559 --> 00:34:22.519
to be the woman that thinks you
remind her of the sister who bid off
478
00:34:22.519 --> 00:34:27.400
her barbie heads, and she is
not going to like you no matter what
479
00:34:27.480 --> 00:34:30.360
you do, and you just have
to let go of it. You have
480
00:34:30.440 --> 00:34:34.280
to say that I'm going to deal
with her professionally. I'm not going to
481
00:34:34.440 --> 00:34:37.800
let this be an issue. I'm
going to keep the emotion out, but
482
00:34:37.960 --> 00:34:42.400
I'm not going to worry anymore about
trying to make her like me, because
483
00:34:42.719 --> 00:34:49.400
that's not going to happen here.
And I also see women sometimes so needy
484
00:34:49.480 --> 00:34:52.719
to be like that they get into
please or habits like smiling too much or
485
00:34:52.800 --> 00:34:59.159
nodding too much. And it's good
to check yourself at the end of the
486
00:34:59.199 --> 00:35:01.960
day and say, how how much
do my cheeks hurt from smiling too much?
487
00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:07.440
Am I nodding too much? Just
playing at neutral sometimes and letting the
488
00:35:07.480 --> 00:35:14.199
other side wonder a little bit can
be very effective. Kate, again,
489
00:35:14.280 --> 00:35:19.239
what a great point. I so
appreciate how you distinguished why being charismatic and
490
00:35:19.440 --> 00:35:22.280
liked works for us, and how
if we're working at it too much doesn't
491
00:35:22.320 --> 00:35:25.719
work for us. I just think
that's great for our listeners and for me,
492
00:35:25.800 --> 00:35:30.360
thank you. There's a point where
you just say, Okay, I
493
00:35:30.480 --> 00:35:37.360
tried and it's not going to happen, So that's that's that's fine. Mm
494
00:35:37.440 --> 00:35:42.519
hmmmm m. And then lastly,
on that particular point, this is something
495
00:35:42.599 --> 00:35:47.320
I see women struggle with. How
can we help women better accept criticism and
496
00:35:47.440 --> 00:35:52.400
with courage and grace so it's not
so such a punch in the gut for
497
00:35:52.440 --> 00:35:58.920
them. Criticism is so important.
It's your boss's opportunity or perhaps some colleagues
498
00:35:59.000 --> 00:36:05.440
opportunity to remind you of something that
you're doing that you may not be aware
499
00:36:05.440 --> 00:36:09.199
of. And I saw study ones
that said that high achieving people, often
500
00:36:09.599 --> 00:36:16.719
in general men and women, tend
not to acknowledge the negativity of certain things
501
00:36:16.719 --> 00:36:22.400
they do. And look at we're
in a world today where failure has gotten
502
00:36:22.400 --> 00:36:25.840
such a bad name. We have
a setback at work, and our partners
503
00:36:25.840 --> 00:36:30.679
and our friends say, oh,
leave it behind, you, don't worry
504
00:36:30.679 --> 00:36:36.440
about it, move on. It's
really important to look at our failures and
505
00:36:36.480 --> 00:36:40.159
look at criticism, criticisms we've received
and learned from them, and say,
506
00:36:40.320 --> 00:36:44.559
is there a pattern here? Am
I hearing the same thing over and over
507
00:36:44.599 --> 00:36:47.679
again? How can I fix this
so it doesn't sabotage me in the future.
508
00:36:49.480 --> 00:36:55.559
I saw study ones that said that
bosses sometimes stop offering their female subordinates
509
00:36:55.599 --> 00:37:00.639
as much criticism as they want to
that they think would be a feat because
510
00:37:00.679 --> 00:37:04.480
they get teary or defensive, and
you don't want that happen to happen.
511
00:37:05.119 --> 00:37:08.599
You want to know. So what
I think is helpful is if we can
512
00:37:08.679 --> 00:37:14.480
all reframe criticism as the gift that
allows us to be able when we respond
513
00:37:14.480 --> 00:37:17.239
to it, to become the people
we were meant to become. That I'm
514
00:37:17.280 --> 00:37:22.679
all about self actualization and self realization, and so if we can look at
515
00:37:22.679 --> 00:37:28.559
criticisms that gift that helps us become
that amazing person we can become, I
516
00:37:28.559 --> 00:37:31.159
think it's much easier to hear it. Yes, unless you've got an abusive
517
00:37:31.199 --> 00:37:36.000
boss, and that those bosses should
be left immediately. Well, yes,
518
00:37:36.039 --> 00:37:38.960
I completely agree with that. Yes, okay, let's take another fast short
519
00:37:39.000 --> 00:37:43.679
break, our last one for this
particular show. I'm Alis Cortez, your
520
00:37:43.719 --> 00:37:45.360
host. We've been on the air
with Kate White, the New York Times
521
00:37:45.360 --> 00:37:51.079
bestselling author of twelve murder mysteries and
thrillers and several popular career books, including
522
00:37:51.159 --> 00:37:54.760
the Gutsy Girl handbook, Your Manifesto
for Success, based on her groundbreaking bestseller
523
00:37:54.800 --> 00:37:59.280
Why Good Girls Don't Get Ahead,
But Gutsy Girls Do. She joins us
524
00:37:59.280 --> 00:38:01.440
today from New York City. We've
been talking more about these rules and how
525
00:38:01.440 --> 00:38:05.880
they've been helping her in her life
and those other women around her. Will
526
00:38:05.920 --> 00:38:08.800
continue the conversation after the break,
stay with us. Alis Cortes is a
527
00:38:08.840 --> 00:38:15.719
speaker and engagement and development catalyst.
She designs and delivers professional development, leadership
528
00:38:15.760 --> 00:38:20.440
and engagement workshops and can bring her
expertise to your organization. She will help
529
00:38:20.480 --> 00:38:25.400
ignite meaningful development within your workforce that
will increase employee engagement, performance and retention.
530
00:38:25.719 --> 00:38:30.320
To learn more or to invite Elise
to speak to your organization, please
531
00:38:30.440 --> 00:38:36.119
visit her at www dot elisecortes dot
com. She would welcome the opportunity to
532
00:38:36.119 --> 00:38:46.400
help get your employees working on purpose. This is working on Purpose with Elise
533
00:38:46.440 --> 00:38:52.960
Cortes. To reach our program today, send an email to a lease Alic
534
00:38:52.440 --> 00:39:00.719
at Elisecortes dot Com. Now back
to working on purpose if you're just tuning
535
00:39:00.760 --> 00:39:02.559
in. My guess is Kate White, the New York Times bestselling author of
536
00:39:02.599 --> 00:39:07.760
twelve murder mysteries and thrillers, in
several popular career books, including the Gutsy
537
00:39:07.800 --> 00:39:12.239
Girl handbook, Your Manifesto for Success, based on her groundbreaking bestseller Why Good
538
00:39:12.239 --> 00:39:15.000
Girls Don't Get Ahead, But Gutsy
Girls Do. For fourteen years, Kate
539
00:39:15.079 --> 00:39:20.360
was the editor in chief of Cosmopolitan
Magazine, where she increased overall circulation by
540
00:39:20.400 --> 00:39:23.320
thirty percent and made Cosmo the number
one magazine in the US and single sales
541
00:39:23.320 --> 00:39:29.039
copy. I'm your host, Alis
Cortes. So for our last segment here,
542
00:39:29.320 --> 00:39:30.480
Kate, I just want to see
if we can get a few more
543
00:39:30.480 --> 00:39:35.159
of those rules out on the table
here for our listeners here. And one
544
00:39:35.159 --> 00:39:37.360
of them that you talk about that
I'm intrigued with is is you say that
545
00:39:37.360 --> 00:39:43.480
a gutsy girl owns her excellence.
Why that's intriguing to me is that when
546
00:39:43.480 --> 00:39:45.960
I work with women that I coach, a lot of the feedback they get
547
00:39:46.079 --> 00:39:49.800
is when they claim their competence or
what they're good at, they're told that
548
00:39:49.840 --> 00:39:52.760
they're brash. So, first,
what's your response to that, Oh that
549
00:39:52.760 --> 00:39:59.519
bugs me. It's sure the pretty
too. We're not being told we're brash
550
00:39:59.559 --> 00:40:02.360
for being man's flame by a guy
who thinks he knows better than we do.
551
00:40:05.840 --> 00:40:09.039
Yes, exactly. The one thing
I would say if I heard the
552
00:40:09.159 --> 00:40:15.039
term brash a couple of times,
I would step back and look at how
553
00:40:15.039 --> 00:40:21.440
I'm going about it, because it
could be just certain phrases we're using or
554
00:40:21.800 --> 00:40:25.800
way we're presenting might be adding to
that and it may not be fair.
555
00:40:27.280 --> 00:40:32.519
But there's nothing wrong with a little
course correction if you feel that there just
556
00:40:32.679 --> 00:40:39.400
might be some ways that you present
that could be offensive. But I think
557
00:40:39.400 --> 00:40:45.039
for the most part today, when
women come across showing their power and their
558
00:40:45.079 --> 00:40:50.639
confidence, it's appealing. When you're
dealing with the right bosses and the right
559
00:40:50.719 --> 00:40:57.559
companies, it's valued. The big
mistake I see women making in terms of
560
00:40:57.599 --> 00:41:02.760
owning their excellence is not feeling ready
when they really are for stuff. There
561
00:41:02.840 --> 00:41:07.880
was a study that got mentioned in
books that women think they have to be
562
00:41:07.920 --> 00:41:10.920
one hundred percent ready to go after
a job and guys only sixty percent,
563
00:41:12.039 --> 00:41:15.440
And someone very interestingly showed there's no
study. It was a journalist who did
564
00:41:15.440 --> 00:41:19.559
a story on this, and I
had tried to find the very same study
565
00:41:19.599 --> 00:41:22.039
after I read about it and lean
in there's no such study, but it
566
00:41:22.079 --> 00:41:27.559
was extrapolated from a remark a guy
from McKinsey maid. But I think he's
567
00:41:27.639 --> 00:41:30.480
right. We think we have to
be one hundred percent ready, and owning
568
00:41:30.480 --> 00:41:37.039
our excellence is accepting that for a
big new job or promotion, no one
569
00:41:37.119 --> 00:41:42.000
expects us to be one hundred percent
ready. It's always going to be of
570
00:41:42.039 --> 00:41:46.239
a bit of a stretch. So
own your excellence. Know that it's best
571
00:41:46.239 --> 00:41:51.239
to say yes even if you don't
feel one hundred percent ready, and then
572
00:41:51.559 --> 00:41:55.519
figure it out from there. Let
your motto be not ready, aim fire,
573
00:41:57.199 --> 00:42:00.440
but aim fire ready, and just
go for it. I love that,
574
00:42:00.559 --> 00:42:05.280
Kate. In fact, I'll tell
you I speak a lot to audiences
575
00:42:05.280 --> 00:42:07.639
of women and women who are developing
their careers and their leadership, and one
576
00:42:07.679 --> 00:42:10.159
of the things I tell them is
that there's something we can learn from men,
577
00:42:10.679 --> 00:42:15.559
and that is that a man doesn't
even think twice about applying for a
578
00:42:15.639 --> 00:42:17.639
job. Let's say there's ten things
in that job that you're supposed to have
579
00:42:17.679 --> 00:42:22.400
for competencies or education or experience.
If he has, you know, four
580
00:42:22.480 --> 00:42:24.360
or five of them, he's going
to put his name in the hat.
581
00:42:24.760 --> 00:42:28.960
A woman, if she has seven
or eight, will go I'm not sure
582
00:42:28.960 --> 00:42:32.639
I'm missing a couple. Maybe I
shouldn't do it. And it's amazing to
583
00:42:32.679 --> 00:42:37.840
me. So the man applies and
he gets the job right. There's an
584
00:42:37.880 --> 00:42:42.199
executive coach that is a friend of
mine and I've interviewed over some of my
585
00:42:42.199 --> 00:42:45.840
books, and she was telling me
that in her business that it's so funny
586
00:42:45.880 --> 00:42:51.679
that if a woman is practically flown
in French, she'll put down she'll put
587
00:42:51.719 --> 00:42:57.519
on her resume some French where a
guy who had four years in college rights
588
00:42:57.599 --> 00:43:01.199
fluent in French. I know,
are just ballsy that way, and we
589
00:43:01.280 --> 00:43:07.480
should absolutely steal a page from that. That's what I say too, Absolutely
590
00:43:07.440 --> 00:43:10.159
absolutely well. One of the other
great things that you have in your book
591
00:43:10.199 --> 00:43:14.679
that I just think is just so
great for women to really focus on in
592
00:43:14.719 --> 00:43:17.679
their careers about You've got four points
and how them can increase their cloud,
593
00:43:17.719 --> 00:43:22.239
starting with driving profitability. Now,
I don't know how anybody can argue with
594
00:43:22.280 --> 00:43:25.559
that, So will you say a
few things about how women can increase their
595
00:43:25.599 --> 00:43:30.320
cloud. Let me first say one
of the mistakes we make once we are
596
00:43:30.440 --> 00:43:37.400
successful is to start resting on our
warrels a little bit, not intentionally,
597
00:43:37.480 --> 00:43:43.960
but we get busy. You need
to be evaluating regularly. Do I need
598
00:43:44.039 --> 00:43:49.519
to up my presence here? Do
I need to remind people of my cloud?
599
00:43:49.559 --> 00:43:53.480
Am I involved enough? And what
I need involved in? And one
600
00:43:53.519 --> 00:43:59.719
of the big cloud factors is are
you really doing stuff that is saving the
601
00:43:59.719 --> 00:44:04.880
cump any money or driving profitability?
And if you're not, if you're just
602
00:44:05.039 --> 00:44:07.800
pushing some papers around, you need
to go back to the drawing board and
603
00:44:07.800 --> 00:44:14.199
figure out how you're going to do
that. Another one is feeling entitled to
604
00:44:14.400 --> 00:44:22.239
information that you in a company.
It's really important. Particularly there's a really
605
00:44:22.280 --> 00:44:24.199
interesting you know, I know we
don't have a time by some research that
606
00:44:24.280 --> 00:44:30.400
shows that one of the reasons women
aren't picked for leadership positions is that they
607
00:44:30.519 --> 00:44:35.119
don't have business acumen. In terms
of the company, you should be reading
608
00:44:35.119 --> 00:44:43.079
the annual report, listening in on
earning calls, and just getting a sense
609
00:44:43.119 --> 00:44:46.800
of what are the big company goals
and how can I be a part of
610
00:44:46.840 --> 00:44:52.639
achieving them. You want to build
alliances as part of increasing your cloud.
611
00:44:52.239 --> 00:44:55.760
This is a time where you should
be really getting to know people and other
612
00:44:55.840 --> 00:45:00.320
departments supporting them, so they support
you. And just back to what I
613
00:45:00.360 --> 00:45:05.559
said before, be not just a
change agent, be a risk agent.
614
00:45:05.960 --> 00:45:10.920
Look for ways to disrupt, to
bring freshness and bold ideas into your company.
615
00:45:13.239 --> 00:45:16.239
That was golden. I think you're
right that so many women don't really
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00:45:16.320 --> 00:45:20.360
have the business acumen that they need. And I think the alliances you talked
617
00:45:20.360 --> 00:45:22.239
about was so important because a lot
of those people are going to be the
618
00:45:22.239 --> 00:45:27.920
people that help usher you in and
up in organizations, those alliances, and
619
00:45:27.960 --> 00:45:30.880
they take time and attention, Yeah, they do. So don't make the
620
00:45:30.920 --> 00:45:36.920
mistake of burrowing in at your death
and keeping your nose close to the grindstone.
621
00:45:37.400 --> 00:45:40.400
That can look like it works because
it worked maybe when you were in
622
00:45:40.519 --> 00:45:45.840
ninth grade, but it doesn't work
in the business world. You need to
623
00:45:45.039 --> 00:45:50.920
be aware of your presence and the
company and what it's saying and what your
624
00:45:51.079 --> 00:45:55.599
role is viewed at. So step
back and look at that. I want
625
00:45:55.639 --> 00:45:59.199
to give you a chance to maybe
close the show with this, if you
626
00:45:59.239 --> 00:46:02.480
will. We talk a lot about
the show about leadership helping companies grow and
627
00:46:02.559 --> 00:46:07.719
change, and you've got something in
there about a gut's girl becomes a kick
628
00:46:07.719 --> 00:46:12.440
ass boss. So what do you
mean by that? It's pretty much what
629
00:46:12.760 --> 00:46:19.920
anyone would tell you. You want
to be clear about your vision. You
630
00:46:19.960 --> 00:46:22.719
want to revisit your vision frequently,
you want to share it. You want
631
00:46:22.800 --> 00:46:27.519
to set standards for the people who
work for you. You want to reward
632
00:46:27.599 --> 00:46:30.280
them but most and you want to
be a good listener. So important.
633
00:46:30.559 --> 00:46:34.960
But I think for me, one
of the things that I really enjoyed so
634
00:46:35.079 --> 00:46:38.960
much at COSMO was being the kind
of boss that I felt fierce devotion from
635
00:46:38.960 --> 00:46:43.920
the people who work for me.
And so many of those people are still
636
00:46:44.360 --> 00:46:50.519
in my life as friends and mentees. And you do that by making them
637
00:46:50.519 --> 00:46:54.320
feel passionate about the mission and what
they are going to learn from the mission.
638
00:46:54.639 --> 00:47:00.079
And even though I knew sometimes I
was doing this giving away some of
639
00:47:00.840 --> 00:47:05.239
the house secrets to people who would
go on and run other magazines. I
640
00:47:05.360 --> 00:47:08.960
shared my philosophy with them, I
told them what I thought was a winning
641
00:47:09.000 --> 00:47:15.400
cover line, I shared some of
the research. So they felt this job
642
00:47:15.559 --> 00:47:20.159
was of value to them because they
were really learning a ton and could use
643
00:47:20.199 --> 00:47:23.360
it, love it, and go
on from there and be a success in
644
00:47:23.400 --> 00:47:28.239
a bigger way someplace else. One
day, you contributed them and you made
645
00:47:28.239 --> 00:47:31.079
them bigger than they were than before
they found you. Yes, and there
646
00:47:31.199 --> 00:47:37.400
is something so rewarding about that.
My former number two is now the editor
647
00:47:37.400 --> 00:47:39.840
in chief of Cosmopolity, and I
just dropped her an email today. I
648
00:47:39.920 --> 00:47:45.039
just loved this woman. She was
just so fantastic and the fact that I
649
00:47:45.119 --> 00:47:49.639
get to still have her in my
life in a way so rewarding. And
650
00:47:50.360 --> 00:47:54.079
one day somebody told me that three
women who were editors in chief who would
651
00:47:54.079 --> 00:47:59.199
work for me ran into each other
at an event and they laughingly said,
652
00:47:59.320 --> 00:48:06.880
yeah, we went to editor in
chief camp under boot camp under Kate White.
653
00:48:07.239 --> 00:48:10.880
And that's what I love. The
idea that people saw is that if
654
00:48:10.920 --> 00:48:15.480
I work for her, I'm going
to be an editor in chief one day.
655
00:48:15.199 --> 00:48:19.800
Oh my gosh, that's what you
want to do as a boss.
656
00:48:19.840 --> 00:48:22.679
You want people to think this is
good for me. I love the mission
657
00:48:22.760 --> 00:48:28.239
here, but it's also a value
to me in terms of my career.
658
00:48:28.800 --> 00:48:32.320
And you can let them in on
your thinking so they walk out of your
659
00:48:32.360 --> 00:48:38.119
office going she just shared with me
her best cover line writing tip, or
660
00:48:38.360 --> 00:48:44.159
she just shared for me what kind
of celebrity really sells on the cover.
661
00:48:44.280 --> 00:48:46.400
And I'm going to be able to
use that one day when I compete against
662
00:48:46.480 --> 00:48:51.639
her. Oh my gosh, what
a great way to finish the show.
663
00:48:51.719 --> 00:48:53.679
Kate, what a gift you are. I thank you so much for coming
664
00:48:53.760 --> 00:48:58.400
on the show, sharing your wisdom, your passion, your expertise with the
665
00:48:58.440 --> 00:49:01.760
listenership, and me say thank you. Alisa was wonderful. I bet you
666
00:49:01.800 --> 00:49:07.360
were just the most fabulous guide for
women and coach for women, and boy,
667
00:49:07.519 --> 00:49:10.679
I'd love to be one of your
clients one day. Other way around,
668
00:49:10.760 --> 00:49:15.360
Kate, I'm gonna keep I'm gonna
keep after you, so listeners.
669
00:49:15.360 --> 00:49:17.239
If you want to learn more about
Kate White and her numerous books and what
670
00:49:17.320 --> 00:49:22.599
she's up to, visit her website. It's www dot Kate White speaks dot
671
00:49:22.639 --> 00:49:27.360
com. That's Kate White speaks dot
com. Join us next week when we
672
00:49:27.400 --> 00:49:30.880
talk with Gwynn Rich, who is
truly working on purpose as she continues to
673
00:49:30.920 --> 00:49:34.880
live, as she says, past
her expiration date as a breast cancer battler.
674
00:49:35.119 --> 00:49:37.159
We'll be talking about what women can
do to prevent cancer and how she
675
00:49:37.280 --> 00:49:42.159
is living a legacy for others in
her closing days on the planet. See
676
00:49:42.159 --> 00:49:44.599
you then, remember that work is
at least one third of our life,
677
00:49:44.679 --> 00:49:49.400
So let's work on Purpose. Well, you hope you've enjoyed this week's program.
678
00:49:49.800 --> 00:49:52.800
Be sure to tune in to Working
on Purpose, featuring your host Alis
679
00:49:52.880 --> 00:49:59.280
Cortes, each week on the Voice
America Empowerment Channel. This week, find
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00:49:59.360 --> 00:50:00.440
your life's purpose at work.
1
00:00:05.040 --> 00:00:09.000
There are some people that make their
work just another thing they have to do,
2
00:00:09.400 --> 00:00:12.640
and there are those that make their
work something that they want to do.
3
00:00:13.359 --> 00:00:18.839
Welcome to Working on Purpose with your
host Elise Cortes. In our program,
4
00:00:18.879 --> 00:00:23.719
we provide guidance and inspiration from those
people who have found deeper meaning and
5
00:00:23.920 --> 00:00:28.920
personal connection to their work life.
It's beyond nine to five. It's working
6
00:00:28.960 --> 00:00:35.039
on purpose. Now Here is your
host, Elise Cortes. I'm your host,
7
00:00:35.039 --> 00:00:38.079
Elise Cortes, joining from Dallas,
Texas, which is home base for
8
00:00:38.200 --> 00:00:41.960
me. This program is all about
helping people more meaningfully and productively connect with
9
00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.759
their work and equipping leaders and organizations
to cultivate meeting and purpose within those organizations.
10
00:00:47.159 --> 00:00:50.240
I bring on guests to have a
particular perspective or experience that I think
11
00:00:50.240 --> 00:00:54.359
contributes to work. Spans this conversation, and as a management consultant and social
12
00:00:54.359 --> 00:00:57.079
scientist, I draw into meeting and
work research I've been doing over the last
13
00:00:57.079 --> 00:01:00.920
fifteen years, as well as from
my own consulting speaker and experience developing workforces
14
00:01:00.960 --> 00:01:04.040
across the globe. Last week,
if you missed the live show, you
15
00:01:04.040 --> 00:01:07.599
can always catch it be recorded podcast. We were on The Doctor Joy Martina,
16
00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:11.200
author of How to Use Your Intuition
to Change Your Life. She gave
17
00:01:11.319 --> 00:01:15.719
us many pearls of wisdom from her
years of research, inquiry, and practice
18
00:01:15.719 --> 00:01:19.480
helping business leaders and celebrities developed their
intuitive intelligence. It was a fascinating conversation.
19
00:01:19.560 --> 00:01:23.400
A I learned a ton with us
this week is Kate White, the
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New York Times best selling author of
twelve murder mysteries and thrillers and several popular
21
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career books, including the Gutsy Girl
handbook, Your Manifesto for Success, based
22
00:01:33.480 --> 00:01:37.680
on her groundbreaking bestseller Why Good Girls
Don't Get It Ahead, But Gutsy Girls
23
00:01:37.719 --> 00:01:41.400
Do. For fourteen years, Kate
was the editor in chief of the Cosmopolitan
24
00:01:41.519 --> 00:01:45.840
magazine, where she increased overall circulation
by thirty percent and made Cosmo the number
25
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one magazine in the US in single
copy sales. Today, we're here to
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00:01:49.640 --> 00:01:52.959
talk about how women can learn from
her years of experience asigotzea woman in the
27
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business world, now what she's learned
from many others along the way. She
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00:01:56.640 --> 00:02:00.120
joins today from New York City.
Kate, Welcome to working on per Thank
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00:02:00.200 --> 00:02:05.200
you, Elise. I am so
happy to have you and thrilled you came
30
00:02:05.280 --> 00:02:07.840
into my path. Oh my gosh, I'm going to learn a ton from
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you, and I just love the
idea of celebrating who you are and what
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00:02:12.479 --> 00:02:15.039
you've done in the world with all
of our listeners. Kates, So thank
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you for being with us. It's
great. So I want to start by
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00:02:17.879 --> 00:02:22.280
situating why. One of the reasons
I wanted to have you on the show
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is I do a lot of work
coaching women across the globe as they developed
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their careers and certainly as they developed
their leadership. And as you say in
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00:02:30.479 --> 00:02:34.879
your book so eloquently, we've come
a long way, but really just not
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00:02:35.120 --> 00:02:39.520
enough. So can you start by
giving us some status about women in the
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workplace? And I mean, I'm
generally pretty positive about things and pretty optimistic,
40
00:02:44.080 --> 00:02:46.800
but what you have in the book
is still kind of dismal. Where
41
00:02:46.840 --> 00:02:52.159
are we well? I had to
use the word dismal because certainly, just
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00:02:52.199 --> 00:02:54.159
as you sat, at least we've
come so far. When I was first
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00:02:54.159 --> 00:02:58.960
in New York in the seventies,
I applied at Newsweek magazine for a job
44
00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:01.319
because I wanted to be in journalism, and I was told, look,
45
00:03:01.400 --> 00:03:06.919
you can only get so far because
women are not allowed to become editors here,
46
00:03:07.159 --> 00:03:12.000
and it took a lawsuit by some
brave women who worked at Newsweek to
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00:03:12.080 --> 00:03:16.120
change that. So things are so
different, but still according to one of
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the surveys from Lean in the Sheryl
Sandberg Company, they looked at eighteen thousand
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jobs and they found that women earned
ninety two cents on the dollar compared to
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men, but when women entered management, that dropped to eighty three cents,
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So you still see a discrepancy there. And one of the stats that really
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bugged me was the fact of and
this came from Catalysts, that the women
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account for forty four percent of all
employees at SMP companies SMP five hundred companies,
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they account for just twenty five percent
of people of twenty five percent of
55
00:03:55.479 --> 00:04:01.680
management. And I think this stat
that really slew me was was one involving
56
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of Beyonce. There's that great song
where Beyonce talks about girls running the world.
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But the company that creates and markets
her Fragrance, until recently had no
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women on its executive in its executive
ranks or its board. And they finally
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added one person because I think that
stack got out there. So we still
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do have our work to do,
for sure, m h. And of
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course part of what I stand for
there on that Kate, for sure is
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I think that part of it,
not all of it, not even close
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to all of it. Part of
it is that I think that workplaces are
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not compelling for a lot of women. It's not interesting for they how they
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experience work. And of course I'm
out to be able to help companies elicit
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more meaning and purpose, make it
a better place for everyone to enjoy themselves
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and grow and thrive. But we
won't talk about that in this episode.
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I want to talk about what you
have learned and what you have, what
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you can share about your background,
your experience and all these branch you had
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writing books. So one of the
things I want to ask, and I
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just love your whole career case,
it's just so inspiring. But I want
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to talk about how you have been
able to apply that the Gutzy Girl principles
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you talk about in your book.
You have nine of them in there,
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I believe, but it's to the
extent that we can sure at least some
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of them on the show with our
listeners. It would be great if you
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could just say a little bit about
how you've used some of those to be
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able to do some of the amazing
things that you've done a chief of Red
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Book, editor in chief of Cosmopolitan, writing twelve books. It's impressive.
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Well, I think for me,
some of it has been unleashing those gutsy
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girl instincts that were there when I
was growing up but got tamped down at
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times because I, like a lot
of women, there are moments where I
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feel, oh, I don't want
to rock the boat here. I don't
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want to step into a pubble with
my party shoes on. And so it
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was really trying to let some of
those onferral, and also at certain situations
85
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stepping back and saying, Okay,
this isn't working. What do I have
86
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to do to make a change here. There was one point where I was
87
00:06:06.079 --> 00:06:12.160
the number two at a magazine,
just a small Sunday supplement magazine, and
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I was up for the number one
job after my boss left and I ran
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the magazine for three months while they
conduct a search for his successor, and
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I threw my hat in the ring, or was told your hat's in the
91
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ring, and I didn't get the
job, And later my boss, who
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had gone on to run GQ,
took me aside and he said, I
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heard that your proposal was the best
and you didn't get the job because you
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were a woman. And that was
a moment where I probably could have cried
95
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into my beer, but I said, you know what I'm going to do.
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I'm going to go back into women's
magazines and I'm not going to end
97
00:06:46.120 --> 00:06:49.000
up having that hurdle in front of
me. So probably for me, I
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would say what's helped me the most
is the ability sometimes to step back and
99
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look at the landscape and say,
Okay, here's what I've got to do
100
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differently. Always I've been good about
asking for what I want, because if
101
00:07:03.480 --> 00:07:08.000
you don't ask, you're not going
to get it. And one part,
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just one last thing, I would
say, a big part to me of
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00:07:11.279 --> 00:07:17.040
gutsiness is not being afraid to show
your passion. Passion is really contagious.
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00:07:17.319 --> 00:07:21.079
And once when I got a job
as the energy for Red Book, that
105
00:07:21.240 --> 00:07:26.920
headhunter told me later, Kate,
don't change, and I said, what
106
00:07:26.920 --> 00:07:30.199
do you mean by that? And
he said, so many people who applied
107
00:07:30.199 --> 00:07:33.160
for top jobs feel they have to
be buttoned up, and you just wore
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00:07:33.199 --> 00:07:36.759
your heart on your sleeve about how
much you wanted that job, and that
109
00:07:36.920 --> 00:07:42.399
is a winning formula, and I
wish I could teach that to other people.
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00:07:43.439 --> 00:07:47.160
So that's I think that's been a
big part of my success is not
111
00:07:47.199 --> 00:07:51.600
being afraid to even seem a little
corny sometimes about how much I want something
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00:07:53.000 --> 00:07:56.959
and how much I'd like to bring
to it. Oh that's so beautiful,
113
00:07:57.040 --> 00:07:59.600
Kate, And thank you for a
couple of things. One using the word
114
00:07:59.639 --> 00:08:03.279
unleashing your gutsy girl instincts. I
use that word a lot. And two
115
00:08:05.120 --> 00:08:07.120
I do a lot of coaching with
women, and women are You're right?
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00:08:07.240 --> 00:08:11.079
Are more and more so buttoned up
in the workplace, And I tell them,
117
00:08:11.079 --> 00:08:15.519
please show your authenticity. Let us
see what inspires you, what brings
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00:08:15.560 --> 00:08:18.600
you to life, and what is
your purpose because that is irresistible to people,
119
00:08:18.680 --> 00:08:20.639
and they're like, really, are
you sure? And they don't believe
120
00:08:20.680 --> 00:08:24.639
me. So if they don't believe
me, then we'll let them believe you.
121
00:08:24.279 --> 00:08:26.759
Alisa, I once got a letter
from a girl who wants to be
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00:08:26.759 --> 00:08:31.720
an Internet Cosmo, and she had
this line in the letter that she had
123
00:08:31.759 --> 00:08:37.399
me at this line because she said, I can still remember being fifteen and
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reading Cosmos in as I lay on
my bed in unmatched pajamas, and I
125
00:08:43.480 --> 00:08:46.200
thought, Wow, what an authentic
moment. I could picture her on her
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bed in those unmatched pajamas, and
I just love everything that was so authentic
127
00:08:52.279 --> 00:08:56.279
about her letter. Don't be afraid
to show that, don't be afraid to
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00:08:56.320 --> 00:09:01.039
wear your heart on your sleeve.
I am completely completely with you, and
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00:09:01.080 --> 00:09:03.960
we want to encour get that message
out there more writ large. And you
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are a good person to speak that, Kate, So thank you. Okay,
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Well, let's talk about some of
those rules. I like in this
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show, Kate, to give our
listeners as much information that they can actually
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walk away and use as we possibly
can while they get to know you and
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what you're about. So one of
the rules, the first one that you
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talk about in the book is I
got to girl breaks the rules. So
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would you say a bit more about
that. What do you mean by breaking
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the rules? Sometimes to stand out
from the pack, you have to do
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things a little differently. This is
such an old example, but when I
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was a senior in college, my
college picked me to enter Glamour Magazine's Top
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ten College Woman contest, and I
really wanted to win because I thought it
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would be an entree to the publishing
world. In New York and the part
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of the entry was writing an essay
about your goals for the future, and
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I decided to write an ast say
about why I had no goals for the
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future. And of course I circle
back in the piece and I did have
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goals, but I know that essay
helped me to win and I ended up
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being on the cover and that was
my entry into magazines. So sometimes you
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just have to look at things a
little bit differently. Once you're in a
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job, it's really important to know
that it's not enough to do things anymore
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just what you've been told to do, and to do them really well.
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You've got to come up with bold, innovative, sometimes disruptive ideas for your
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boss, for your department, for
your company, and not just follow the
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rules. And that may be simply, let's say your boss asks you to
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prontounce some numbers and run some numbers
and do an analysis, a very simple
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analysis. But as you're doing that
analysis, you see a pattern. And
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you haven't been told to look for
a pattern, but you see a pattern.
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And in terms of let's say sales
in California, to put a top
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memo on that and that running of
the numbers you did where you say.
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While I was doing this, I
happen to see a really interesting trend in
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California. Wouldn't it be terrific if
we did such and such and try to
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leverage that That's not what you've been
told to do, but it tells your
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boss that you are a gutsy thinker
and you're going to go beyond your job
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description. True value added, Kate. I also teach here at Southern Methodis
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University, so I work with a
lot of young students who are just entering
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their careers, and I often tell
them just that exan exact advice. Go
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look for what you see and offer
it, give it. And what I'm
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finding is that the younger generation especially
seems a little more reticent. And maybe
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that's just because they haven't been much
experience in the world, but they're like,
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are you sure if that's okay?
Are you yes? It's better than
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okay. So many of my wonderful
staffers, initially they didn't know how to
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do that. Often I knew something
I called the four bes. It's a
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great little tool that I found helped
me a lot. At COSMO. I
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would ask myself about any event I
was planning any idea. I was working
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on these four bees? Could it
be better? Could it be bigger?
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Could it be bolder? Could it
be more badass? And I that her
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ways to blow it up and move
out color outside the lines with it.
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Often that's where you get the idea
that's different than the same old way you've
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always done it before. M hm. And I like how you bring that
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to life in your book too,
because I caught that too. Love that.
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Okay, well let's go into rule
number two and you've already kind of
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alluded to it, But I just
love how in your book you just really
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just bring it out there and you
say, I got to girl decides what
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she wants to be famous for and
then she goes for it fearlessly. I
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love that. But how do we
pull that off? Well, I'm a
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big believer, even though it's become
a little cliche these days, that it's
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great to be aware of what you're
personal professional brand is, what is your
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specialty? How do you define it? And it makes it easier for you
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to know what to say yes to, what to say no for, to
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what to go after. And it's
really fun to think about your brand.
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And one of the little exer sizes. I given the book that I was
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helped by with by a wonderful woman
who does brand strategy for BMW group is
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to just take eight or nine words
that you think really define your specialty,
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then try to get it down to
three words and then try to create it
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into a sentence or a statement,
almost like a bumper sticker. And for
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me, when I was doing my
public speaking in the beginning, I started
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to think that maybe mine could become
I'm the authority on gutsy big bold gutsy
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career, or something to that effect. So you're really just giving yourself something
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a statement that you can refer back
to. At Cosmo, our brand statement
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was Funfareless Female, and that was
such a great tool for me because it
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allowed me to look at everything we
were considering every project and say, jee,
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I like this, but is this
too earnest? Is it not enough?
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Fun fare Less Female? So,
if you've got your brand statement down,
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and it can shift over time,
for sure, because everything changes,
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but if you get your brand statement
down, it really allows you to hold
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stuff up against it and evaluate whether
it's going to reinforce your brand when you
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make that choice or follow that path, or it's going to fight it.
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Mm hmm. I love that that. I like just that isolating it down
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like that. I have to work
on that yet for myself. But we
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got time for one more rule before
we have to go on a quick break
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here, and I love this one
and I want you to know Kate that
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thanks to you and reading your book, I actually have a sticky of this
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next one. Rule number three,
girl knows how to hustle. So I've
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got this sticky that says hustle.
So tell us about hustle. Oh,
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to me, hustle is just figuring
out what your priorities are and just going
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for them, working your schedule,
dumping what doesn't matter, delegating, ignoring
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what you can just totally ignore,
and only focusing on what's important. Be
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a ball or look for openings,
go after what really matters, and leave
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the rest behind. Yeah. I
love your whole section on delegating unapologetically because
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a lot of the women that I
do work with as I coach them,
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really struggle with that because they feel
like, I don't want to dump this
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on somebody, or is it fair
to ask, or it's just unapologetically really
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got me. Yes, And one
of the things that this wonderful woman Julia
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Morgenstern, who's a time management expert, mentioned in the book when I interviewed
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her, is that we take sometimes
women take a lot of satisfaction out of
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being the girl who does everything,
so that when something gets dumped on your
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desk and saying, gee, Bob, I'd love to help, but I'm
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focusing on this right now. You
feel like I want to show Bob I
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can do it. I want to
show them a team player. I want
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to show I can do everything.
That's a good girl instinct. YEP,
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I understand that, and we want
to get to the bottom of that and
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start changing course. And on that
note, Kate, let's take our first
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break. I'm your host, Alis
Cortes. We've been on the air with
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Kate White, the New York Times
bestselling author of twelve murder mysteries and thrillers
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and several popular career books, including
the Gutsy Girl handbook, Your Manifesto for
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Success, based on her groundbreaking bestseller
Why Good Girls Don't Get Ahead, But
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Gutsy Girls Do. She joins today
from New York City. We've been talking
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a bit about some of the rules
and how she's gotten to where she is
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in life after the break, will
continue on with some more of those rules.
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Stay with us, We'll be right
back. Elise Cortes is a speaker
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and engagement and development catalyst. She
designs and delivers professional development, leadership and
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engagement workshops and can bring her expertise
to your organization. She will help ignite
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00:17:11.440 --> 00:17:17.920
meaningful development within your workforce that will
increase employee engagement, performance and retention.
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00:17:18.240 --> 00:17:22.200
To learn more or to invite Elise
to speak to your organization, please visit
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00:17:22.240 --> 00:17:26.839
her at www dot elisecortes dot com. She would welcome the opportunity to help
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get your employees working on purpose.
This is working on purpose with Elise Cortes.
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To reach our program today, send
an email to a lease Alic at
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00:17:45.160 --> 00:17:52.079
elisecortes dot com. Now back to
working on purpose if you're just joining us.
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My guest is Kate White, the
New York Times bestselling author of twelve
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murder mysteries and thrillers, in several
popular career books, including the Gutsygirl hand
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Book Your Manifesto for Success, based
on her groundbreaking bestseller Why Good Girls Don't
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Get Ahead But Gotsy Girls Do.
For fourteen years, Kate was the editor
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in chief of Cosmopolitan magazine, where
she increased overall circulation by thirty percent and
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made Cosmo the number one magazine in
the US and single copy sales. We've
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been talking about about her own life, her own experience developing your career,
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and also some of the rules she
wrote about in her book. Now we're
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going to continue on some more of
those rules that I think could be useful.
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So, Kate, one of the
things that you talk about in your
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book that I thought was especially pointing
it and something that we women oftentimes don't
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like to talk about. Who that
is You say that Gatsi girl gets that
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appearances matter, whether that's fair or
not. And you've got a whole section
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on how women ought to maybe consider
dressing for success, including developing a signature
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look, hairstyles, all kinds of
things tell us a little bit about that
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particular role. It does seem unfair, doesn't it, because we ought to
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judge for our skills and our expertise
and our experience. But we are human
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beings and we judge on appearance.
And studies show that, as you probably
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know from your coaching, the decision
not to hire is often made within the
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first five to ten minutes and what
are they basing that on. They're basing
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it on how you're coming across visually. First and foremost, you need to
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dress for the job you aspire to. There's no way around that. And
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once you are in your company,
you need to be dressing for the next
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job that you want so that your
boss can see you in that role when
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that opens up for when you go
after it. And just as important as
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dressing for the job you aspire to
is speaking for the job you aspire to.
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You have to learn to take command
in a meeting and present yourself with
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as much confidence as possible. I
have heard so many women, and I've
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been there my out in meetings pitch
an idea with phrases like maybe we should
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or I'm just spitballing here, or
this probably isn't a good idea. But
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you have to learn to walk into
that room, choose a good seat at
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the table, gain the floor,
and present your idea with confidence and without
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fillers like oh or ah, So
that speaking is as much a part of
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your whole sort of appearance as your
dress is. Kate, that is such
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a great point. I just was
working a few months ago with a woman
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who had been told by her boss, look, you got to speak up
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more in the meetings. People don't
even know who you are, and yet
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you have plenty to share. And
he said, moreover, I want you
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to develop your career here, and
you can't just stay in the same role
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that you're in. And so he
hired me for her, and we worked
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on just that thing. Okay,
Yeah, we worked. He is a
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great boss. I so commend him. And you know what happened is not
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very long after he he hired me
for her, he got promoted and we
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talked and I talked about her applying
for his job. And of course we
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talked about that for a couple of
weeks or so, we got her ready
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for it. She applied for it, and the great story is she got
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the job. Can I just ask
you, what was the best tip you
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gave her for presenting herself better in
meetings? Yeah? What I told her
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was a couple of things. She's
she's quiet by nature, so she's she
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tends to want to take in information
like a lot of people. She's an
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engineer and so she does take in
a lot of data. So what I
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what I told her. One of
the things I told her I said,
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you've got to go and ready to
share something. You have a whole wealth
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of knowledge that you can draw from
because of your experience and your education.
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To go and ready to be able
to draw something from your every day that
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you already know that you know will
be useful. But prepare for that in
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evance, because you're going to need
to prepare for that and it'll make you
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feel more comfortable. But have it
at the ready. You have a few
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things at the ready, and then
you know, be be willing to be
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a little uncomfortable and put yourself out
there right. A lot of people don't
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realize how prepping before a meeting is
so important. They were waiting for the
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meeting to unfold. But you've got
to gain the meeting in advance. Take
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us take some time to look at
the players and guess what their agenda is
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going to be, and go and
prepared absolutely, and yeah, absolutely,
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And to that end, on one
of the other things you talk about in
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the book, one of the other
rules, and you've already kind of mentioned
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it, but it was so important
when she when she was going through the
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interview process, and that is asking
for what we want. You know,
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she wasn't she said, I don't
know what I should ask for, and
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I don't know what I want just
yet. I said, well, you
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got to get really clear about that, but you said it earlier. But
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my daughter, when my daughter was
five, Kate, she came home from
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camp one day and she just said, so matter of fact, you don't
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ask, you don't get. And
I just right, I mean that from
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the mouth of babes. And I
just thought if more of us women could
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get that early on in life and
then live it, how much different our
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lives might be. So true,
And today I actually think women have come
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to see how important asking is.
When I did the first book Why Good
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Girls Don't Get Ahead, twenty three
years ago, and I would mention the
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importance of asking in a talk I
was giving, I would see women nod
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their heads as if a light bulb
had gone off. Yeah, yeah,
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no, I need to do that. Today women know that, but because
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it makes them so uncomfortable, I
see them talking themselves out of it.
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They'll think, now it's not a
good time, or they don't have the
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money for it, or if they
know I want it, so I don't
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have to ask. You have to
ask. Just as your daughter said,
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you don't ask, you don't get, and you have to ask for opportunities
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too, not just money. There
was a study lately from Hastings School of
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Law that said that women and people
of color are far less likely to be
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given the kind of glamour jobs that
lead to promotions, like representing the company
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in an industry fan or working with
a client on a new project. So
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you've got to raise your hand for
them. You've got to go into your
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boss and say, hey, I
hear this, this is going to be
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happening. I'd loved you to think
of me for this, absolutely. And
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I don't know what it is about
us. I don't know if it is
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that we're afraid of what we want, or if we've been conditioned somehow culturally.
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I don't know, but there is
something about that and I want to
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share just really quick. A few
years ago I went through a program called
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Leadership Women in the Leadership of America
here in Dallas, a great program.
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Love what they're up to. And
I was in that program with a very
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very wicked, smart woman as she
has a PhD in astronomy and anyway,
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sitting there on the bus, she
was sitting there looking and hearing about all
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other women that she'd met, and
she got really inspired and she said,
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darn it, that's it. I'm
just going to do it. And I'm
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like, what what are you going
to do? Are we going to roub
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a bank? What are we doing? And she goes, I'm going to
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put my name on the hat to
be chair of my department, and she
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said, I put it off,
and I keep saying I'm not going to
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do it because I've got young children, I'm busy and all of this and
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all that and all that. I'm
just going to do it. And Kate,
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she put her name in a hat. She's the first female chair of
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the University of Austin to Texas and
she did it. I love that story.
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Yeah, it's wonderful. I'm so
proud of her and she's just kicking
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it. But it did take asking
for what she wanted, putting herself out
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there. Yes, and if you're
not sure what you want, like that
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person you referenced, you just have
to say, I'm going to take some
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time to try to figure out what
it is. And because if I don't
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have clarity, I haven't thought about
my goals and my needs clearly enough.
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Mm hmmm. I think that's so
great, right, really spending some time
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really getting clear and riveting on what
it is that we want for ourselves in
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our lives. Well, I do
want to talk a little bit more about
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money, if you don't mind.
It's something that I think a lot of
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women really struggle with. And we've
already said that. You said ninety two
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cents on the dollar. At least
that's I remember a figure years ago that
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was seventy eight cents on the dollar. So I guess we really are making
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progress. But how do you counsel
women to ask for money or other valuable
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perks when they're out and about going
for what they want. Well, first
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of all, having been a boss
many places, I let them know that
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companies are often low balling, and
that's just a given. Because they're leaving
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money to negotiate with, they often
expect negotiation, So you have to know
377
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that. And when you are applying
for a job and you get the offer,
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you do not accept the amount that
they offer, even if it meets
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what your expectations were, because you
could be leaving money on the table and
380
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you want to read the room.
You want to get a sense of the
381
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best way to approach a negotiation with
that particular person. But I'm a big
382
00:26:53.599 --> 00:27:00.599
believer in just being gracious and saying
something like, Janet, I am thrilled
383
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to get off of this job.
I loved interviewing with you. I've loved
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everything you've told me about the company. I could bring so much here,
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but I was hoping for eighty thousand. Can we make that happen? And
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I know sometimes I would get a
little irritated with people who were gutsy enough
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to negotiate, but when they came
in and performed, all was forgotten.
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And you cannot hesitate to do that. And you can also negotiate for raises
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your boss. If you raise it
disappoints you, it may be because there's
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only so much in the pool.
Then say, all right, well,
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what about another week of vacation,
what about a title change? What about
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the opportunity to revisit this in six
months when the budget opens up. It's
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scary to do it first, but
the more you do it, the more
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you'll find it so much easier to
do over time. And I think the
395
00:28:00.440 --> 00:28:04.279
way that you just gave us that
the entre to be able to speak it
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that way, you know, being
gracious about it. Kate was just great.
397
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I think that's just such a great
example that women can use as maybe
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a bit of a template to be
able to draw from. Yes, I
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just I've seen a couple of studies
like I think there's a Cheryl Sandberg one
400
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that says that when women do this
or seeing this bossy and I hate studies
401
00:28:22.720 --> 00:28:26.720
like that because they make it they
almost discourage us from doing it. Well,
402
00:28:26.759 --> 00:28:30.200
there's a way to do it without
sounding overly assertive or bossy. Just
403
00:28:30.960 --> 00:28:37.680
keep emotion on your voice and be
gracious and ideally they're going to look at
404
00:28:37.680 --> 00:28:41.880
you as someone who just values yourself
and your experience. Mm hmm, I
405
00:28:41.920 --> 00:28:45.920
love that. That's beautiful, Kate, gorgeous. That was worth the price
406
00:28:45.960 --> 00:28:51.680
of emission right there, for sure? True? No pun intended, right,
407
00:28:51.759 --> 00:28:55.680
no pun intended. Okay, Well, let's go on to smart risks.
408
00:28:55.759 --> 00:28:59.400
You've got a whole rule here about
gutsy girls taking smart risks. So
409
00:28:59.519 --> 00:29:03.519
first I want us to distinguish what
you mean by smart risks, and then
410
00:29:03.559 --> 00:29:04.759
we can talk about you know,
really, how does that rule show up
411
00:29:04.799 --> 00:29:10.640
for us in the workforce today?
We have to not only embrace change,
412
00:29:10.759 --> 00:29:15.480
we have to create change. We
have to be disruptors. I love this
413
00:29:15.640 --> 00:29:18.079
quote and I mentioned in the book
of Ursula Burns, who used to be
414
00:29:18.160 --> 00:29:22.519
head of Xerox. She said she
loved people who fix things before they were
415
00:29:22.559 --> 00:29:27.079
broken. We have to have our
ear to the ground and know that there's
416
00:29:27.279 --> 00:29:33.119
time to shift and things move quickly. But you don't want to take stupid
417
00:29:33.279 --> 00:29:37.960
risks, And there are questions to
ask yourself to help guide you, like
418
00:29:40.039 --> 00:29:45.000
what are the potential benefits, what
is the potential harm, how probable is
419
00:29:45.000 --> 00:29:49.480
that harm? How much can I
afford to lose? And it's important to
420
00:29:49.599 --> 00:29:55.079
run through those questions with yourself so
you don't do a risk just because it
421
00:29:55.119 --> 00:29:59.759
looks cool and it sounds good.
You need to do that evaluation for every
422
00:29:59.759 --> 00:30:03.960
big risk. And another good question
is how I feel if a competitor does
423
00:30:03.000 --> 00:30:07.240
this. And all those things help
guide you to an answer that says,
424
00:30:07.279 --> 00:30:10.480
look, I don't have a lot
to lose, but I've got a lot
425
00:30:10.519 --> 00:30:15.240
to gain. Let me go for
it, or maybe not. You are
426
00:30:15.279 --> 00:30:18.680
so reminding me of the conversation we
had on air last week Ky that was
427
00:30:18.720 --> 00:30:25.359
with doctor Joey Martina, and we
were talking about the intelligence of intuition and
428
00:30:25.400 --> 00:30:27.960
how that factored into how we make
decisions and how we take in data and
429
00:30:29.000 --> 00:30:30.799
what we do with that information.
So it seems to me that there is
430
00:30:30.799 --> 00:30:34.720
an element of what you're talking about
about smart risks that does involve intuition.
431
00:30:36.119 --> 00:30:38.279
Yes. No, Yes. In
fact, I heard you mentioned her and
432
00:30:38.319 --> 00:30:41.599
I was thinking, God, I'm
going to go back and listen to that.
433
00:30:41.039 --> 00:30:45.839
I'm a big believer in gut,
but I would explain it a little
434
00:30:45.880 --> 00:30:49.480
differently for myself. I believe in
the educated gut. Part of why I
435
00:30:49.559 --> 00:30:53.160
was able to take Cosmo to number
one in newsstand sales and keep it there
436
00:30:53.240 --> 00:31:00.359
my fourteen years and increase circulation by
thirty percent was because I researched the hell
437
00:31:00.440 --> 00:31:04.599
out of my reader. I did
focus groups, I rated every single thing
438
00:31:04.640 --> 00:31:11.279
in the magazine, and it's that
kind of research that gives you an idea,
439
00:31:11.200 --> 00:31:15.160
that fills your gut with information,
so when you go to make a
440
00:31:15.160 --> 00:31:21.039
decision, it's based on knowledge.
One of my funniest moments was not long
441
00:31:21.039 --> 00:31:23.000
after I started, I took some
covers out to a shopping mall. I
442
00:31:23.039 --> 00:31:26.480
happened to be out of town.
I thought, what the heck. I
443
00:31:26.519 --> 00:31:27.839
took them out, and I asked
these women. I went up to them,
444
00:31:27.880 --> 00:31:30.559
I said, I'm the out of
Cosmo. I'm sure they thought I'd
445
00:31:30.640 --> 00:31:37.039
just gotten out of an insane asylum
doing this in the mall. But I
446
00:31:37.119 --> 00:31:41.079
said, can you tell me which
of these covers do you like the best?
447
00:31:41.559 --> 00:31:45.759
And almost every single woman said to
me, what season is it?
448
00:31:47.480 --> 00:31:52.119
And I knew the clothes had to
be absolutely right for the season. I
449
00:31:52.160 --> 00:31:57.119
didn't think that was as essential on
Cosmo covers because we weren't strictly a fashion
450
00:31:57.160 --> 00:32:04.119
magazine make good gut decisions about what
clothes to put on the cover, but
451
00:32:04.160 --> 00:32:09.920
they based on information that I gathered
from my research. Well, I certainly
452
00:32:10.000 --> 00:32:13.839
have been a research scal much of
my life, so that's a music to
453
00:32:13.880 --> 00:32:16.119
my ears. And I can also
understand why that would also give you a
454
00:32:16.200 --> 00:32:20.519
really strong platform to work from in
order to take those smart risks. That
455
00:32:20.559 --> 00:32:24.279
makes a ton of sense to me, A ton of sense. Definitely awesome.
456
00:32:24.319 --> 00:32:27.559
I love the fact too, that
you would go into malls and actually
457
00:32:27.640 --> 00:32:30.680
just query people what do you think? I love that talk about gutsy that's
458
00:32:30.720 --> 00:32:36.680
just fun. Yeah. Crazy woman
at the Crossgates mall called the police,
459
00:32:36.839 --> 00:32:43.039
call security exactly, but before they
arrived Kennabbott, ask you a few questions
460
00:32:43.079 --> 00:32:49.359
and I'd be well along that line. Really kind of one of the things
461
00:32:49.359 --> 00:32:52.799
that presence for me when you talked
about that is, you know, it
462
00:32:52.839 --> 00:32:55.640
seems to me like you're you are
fearless, you don't care what people think.
463
00:32:57.200 --> 00:33:02.119
And there's this whole thing about about
women being sensitive to people wanting people
464
00:33:02.160 --> 00:33:06.200
liking them. They want to be
liked, and so you have something in
465
00:33:06.240 --> 00:33:08.640
your book about rule number seven.
A gutsy girl doesn't need all the likes.
466
00:33:09.000 --> 00:33:12.680
So the first thing I want to
talk about is why do do you
467
00:33:12.759 --> 00:33:15.599
think that women do feel so strong
that they must be liked? What's behind
468
00:33:15.599 --> 00:33:22.319
that? Well, I'm not a
scientist, but I know from reading that
469
00:33:23.079 --> 00:33:32.000
we are hardwired to want to collaborate. We are mothers and nurturers, and
470
00:33:32.680 --> 00:33:40.759
relationships are important to us and that's
lovely. But let me just also say
471
00:33:42.119 --> 00:33:47.359
being liked at work is really powerful. I'm a big believer in being a
472
00:33:47.480 --> 00:33:53.200
charismatic boss. Look at the people
who have won the presidency over the last
473
00:33:54.000 --> 00:34:04.599
fifty years. It's the careismatic George
Bush's John Kennedy, those people who end
474
00:34:04.680 --> 00:34:10.039
up winning over the ones who are
stiff and uncharismatic. I really believe in
475
00:34:10.280 --> 00:34:14.679
the power of charisma and how important
it is to be liked, and I
476
00:34:14.679 --> 00:34:19.480
think that inspires people. But not
everybody's going to like you. There's going
477
00:34:19.559 --> 00:34:22.519
to be the woman that thinks you
remind her of the sister who bid off
478
00:34:22.519 --> 00:34:27.400
her barbie heads, and she is
not going to like you no matter what
479
00:34:27.480 --> 00:34:30.360
you do, and you just have
to let go of it. You have
480
00:34:30.440 --> 00:34:34.280
to say that I'm going to deal
with her professionally. I'm not going to
481
00:34:34.440 --> 00:34:37.800
let this be an issue. I'm
going to keep the emotion out, but
482
00:34:37.960 --> 00:34:42.400
I'm not going to worry anymore about
trying to make her like me, because
483
00:34:42.719 --> 00:34:49.400
that's not going to happen here.
And I also see women sometimes so needy
484
00:34:49.480 --> 00:34:52.719
to be like that they get into
please or habits like smiling too much or
485
00:34:52.800 --> 00:34:59.159
nodding too much. And it's good
to check yourself at the end of the
486
00:34:59.199 --> 00:35:01.960
day and say, how how much
do my cheeks hurt from smiling too much?
487
00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:07.440
Am I nodding too much? Just
playing at neutral sometimes and letting the
488
00:35:07.480 --> 00:35:14.199
other side wonder a little bit can
be very effective. Kate, again,
489
00:35:14.280 --> 00:35:19.239
what a great point. I so
appreciate how you distinguished why being charismatic and
490
00:35:19.440 --> 00:35:22.280
liked works for us, and how
if we're working at it too much doesn't
491
00:35:22.320 --> 00:35:25.719
work for us. I just think
that's great for our listeners and for me,
492
00:35:25.800 --> 00:35:30.360
thank you. There's a point where
you just say, Okay, I
493
00:35:30.480 --> 00:35:37.360
tried and it's not going to happen, So that's that's that's fine. Mm
494
00:35:37.440 --> 00:35:42.519
hmmmm m. And then lastly,
on that particular point, this is something
495
00:35:42.599 --> 00:35:47.320
I see women struggle with. How
can we help women better accept criticism and
496
00:35:47.440 --> 00:35:52.400
with courage and grace so it's not
so such a punch in the gut for
497
00:35:52.440 --> 00:35:58.920
them. Criticism is so important.
It's your boss's opportunity or perhaps some colleagues
498
00:35:59.000 --> 00:36:05.440
opportunity to remind you of something that
you're doing that you may not be aware
499
00:36:05.440 --> 00:36:09.199
of. And I saw study ones
that said that high achieving people, often
500
00:36:09.599 --> 00:36:16.719
in general men and women, tend
not to acknowledge the negativity of certain things
501
00:36:16.719 --> 00:36:22.400
they do. And look at we're
in a world today where failure has gotten
502
00:36:22.400 --> 00:36:25.840
such a bad name. We have
a setback at work, and our partners
503
00:36:25.840 --> 00:36:30.679
and our friends say, oh,
leave it behind, you, don't worry
504
00:36:30.679 --> 00:36:36.440
about it, move on. It's
really important to look at our failures and
505
00:36:36.480 --> 00:36:40.159
look at criticism, criticisms we've received
and learned from them, and say,
506
00:36:40.320 --> 00:36:44.559
is there a pattern here? Am
I hearing the same thing over and over
507
00:36:44.599 --> 00:36:47.679
again? How can I fix this
so it doesn't sabotage me in the future.
508
00:36:49.480 --> 00:36:55.559
I saw study ones that said that
bosses sometimes stop offering their female subordinates
509
00:36:55.599 --> 00:37:00.639
as much criticism as they want to
that they think would be a feat because
510
00:37:00.679 --> 00:37:04.480
they get teary or defensive, and
you don't want that happen to happen.
511
00:37:05.119 --> 00:37:08.599
You want to know. So what
I think is helpful is if we can
512
00:37:08.679 --> 00:37:14.480
all reframe criticism as the gift that
allows us to be able when we respond
513
00:37:14.480 --> 00:37:17.239
to it, to become the people
we were meant to become. That I'm
514
00:37:17.280 --> 00:37:22.679
all about self actualization and self realization, and so if we can look at
515
00:37:22.679 --> 00:37:28.559
criticisms that gift that helps us become
that amazing person we can become, I
516
00:37:28.559 --> 00:37:31.159
think it's much easier to hear it. Yes, unless you've got an abusive
517
00:37:31.199 --> 00:37:36.000
boss, and that those bosses should
be left immediately. Well, yes,
518
00:37:36.039 --> 00:37:38.960
I completely agree with that. Yes, okay, let's take another fast short
519
00:37:39.000 --> 00:37:43.679
break, our last one for this
particular show. I'm Alis Cortez, your
520
00:37:43.719 --> 00:37:45.360
host. We've been on the air
with Kate White, the New York Times
521
00:37:45.360 --> 00:37:51.079
bestselling author of twelve murder mysteries and
thrillers and several popular career books, including
522
00:37:51.159 --> 00:37:54.760
the Gutsy Girl handbook, Your Manifesto
for Success, based on her groundbreaking bestseller
523
00:37:54.800 --> 00:37:59.280
Why Good Girls Don't Get Ahead,
But Gutsy Girls Do. She joins us
524
00:37:59.280 --> 00:38:01.440
today from New York City. We've
been talking more about these rules and how
525
00:38:01.440 --> 00:38:05.880
they've been helping her in her life
and those other women around her. Will
526
00:38:05.920 --> 00:38:08.800
continue the conversation after the break,
stay with us. Alis Cortes is a
527
00:38:08.840 --> 00:38:15.719
speaker and engagement and development catalyst.
She designs and delivers professional development, leadership
528
00:38:15.760 --> 00:38:20.440
and engagement workshops and can bring her
expertise to your organization. She will help
529
00:38:20.480 --> 00:38:25.400
ignite meaningful development within your workforce that
will increase employee engagement, performance and retention.
530
00:38:25.719 --> 00:38:30.320
To learn more or to invite Elise
to speak to your organization, please
531
00:38:30.440 --> 00:38:36.119
visit her at www dot elisecortes dot
com. She would welcome the opportunity to
532
00:38:36.119 --> 00:38:46.400
help get your employees working on purpose. This is working on Purpose with Elise
533
00:38:46.440 --> 00:38:52.960
Cortes. To reach our program today, send an email to a lease Alic
534
00:38:52.440 --> 00:39:00.719
at Elisecortes dot Com. Now back
to working on purpose if you're just tuning
535
00:39:00.760 --> 00:39:02.559
in. My guess is Kate White, the New York Times bestselling author of
536
00:39:02.599 --> 00:39:07.760
twelve murder mysteries and thrillers, in
several popular career books, including the Gutsy
537
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Girl handbook, Your Manifesto for Success, based on her groundbreaking bestseller Why Good
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00:39:12.239 --> 00:39:15.000
Girls Don't Get Ahead, But Gutsy
Girls Do. For fourteen years, Kate
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was the editor in chief of Cosmopolitan
Magazine, where she increased overall circulation by
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00:39:20.400 --> 00:39:23.320
thirty percent and made Cosmo the number
one magazine in the US and single sales
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copy. I'm your host, Alis
Cortes. So for our last segment here,
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Kate, I just want to see
if we can get a few more
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of those rules out on the table
here for our listeners here. And one
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of them that you talk about that
I'm intrigued with is is you say that
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a gutsy girl owns her excellence.
Why that's intriguing to me is that when
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I work with women that I coach, a lot of the feedback they get
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is when they claim their competence or
what they're good at, they're told that
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they're brash. So, first,
what's your response to that, Oh that
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bugs me. It's sure the pretty
too. We're not being told we're brash
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for being man's flame by a guy
who thinks he knows better than we do.
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00:40:05.840 --> 00:40:09.039
Yes, exactly. The one thing
I would say if I heard the
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term brash a couple of times,
I would step back and look at how
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I'm going about it, because it
could be just certain phrases we're using or
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00:40:21.800 --> 00:40:25.800
way we're presenting might be adding to
that and it may not be fair.
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But there's nothing wrong with a little
course correction if you feel that there just
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might be some ways that you present
that could be offensive. But I think
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for the most part today, when
women come across showing their power and their
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confidence, it's appealing. When you're
dealing with the right bosses and the right
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00:40:50.719 --> 00:40:57.559
companies, it's valued. The big
mistake I see women making in terms of
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owning their excellence is not feeling ready
when they really are for stuff. There
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was a study that got mentioned in
books that women think they have to be
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one hundred percent ready to go after
a job and guys only sixty percent,
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00:41:12.039 --> 00:41:15.440
And someone very interestingly showed there's no
study. It was a journalist who did
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a story on this, and I
had tried to find the very same study
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00:41:19.599 --> 00:41:22.039
after I read about it and lean
in there's no such study, but it
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00:41:22.079 --> 00:41:27.559
was extrapolated from a remark a guy
from McKinsey maid. But I think he's
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right. We think we have to
be one hundred percent ready, and owning
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00:41:30.480 --> 00:41:37.039
our excellence is accepting that for a
big new job or promotion, no one
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expects us to be one hundred percent
ready. It's always going to be of
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a bit of a stretch. So
own your excellence. Know that it's best
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to say yes even if you don't
feel one hundred percent ready, and then
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figure it out from there. Let
your motto be not ready, aim fire,
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but aim fire ready, and just
go for it. I love that,
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Kate. In fact, I'll tell
you I speak a lot to audiences
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of women and women who are developing
their careers and their leadership, and one
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of the things I tell them is
that there's something we can learn from men,
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00:42:10.679 --> 00:42:15.559
and that is that a man doesn't
even think twice about applying for a
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job. Let's say there's ten things
in that job that you're supposed to have
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for competencies or education or experience.
If he has, you know, four
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or five of them, he's going
to put his name in the hat.
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A woman, if she has seven
or eight, will go I'm not sure
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I'm missing a couple. Maybe I
shouldn't do it. And it's amazing to
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00:42:32.679 --> 00:42:37.840
me. So the man applies and
he gets the job right. There's an
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executive coach that is a friend of
mine and I've interviewed over some of my
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books, and she was telling me
that in her business that it's so funny
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00:42:45.880 --> 00:42:51.679
that if a woman is practically flown
in French, she'll put down she'll put
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on her resume some French where a
guy who had four years in college rights
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00:42:57.599 --> 00:43:01.199
fluent in French. I know,
are just ballsy that way, and we
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should absolutely steal a page from that. That's what I say too, Absolutely
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absolutely well. One of the other
great things that you have in your book
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that I just think is just so
great for women to really focus on in
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00:43:14.719 --> 00:43:17.679
their careers about You've got four points
and how them can increase their cloud,
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starting with driving profitability. Now,
I don't know how anybody can argue with
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00:43:22.280 --> 00:43:25.559
that, So will you say a
few things about how women can increase their
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00:43:25.599 --> 00:43:30.320
cloud. Let me first say one
of the mistakes we make once we are
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00:43:30.440 --> 00:43:37.400
successful is to start resting on our
warrels a little bit, not intentionally,
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00:43:37.480 --> 00:43:43.960
but we get busy. You need
to be evaluating regularly. Do I need
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00:43:44.039 --> 00:43:49.519
to up my presence here? Do
I need to remind people of my cloud?
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00:43:49.559 --> 00:43:53.480
Am I involved enough? And what
I need involved in? And one
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00:43:53.519 --> 00:43:59.719
of the big cloud factors is are
you really doing stuff that is saving the
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00:43:59.719 --> 00:44:04.880
cump any money or driving profitability?
And if you're not, if you're just
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00:44:05.039 --> 00:44:07.800
pushing some papers around, you need
to go back to the drawing board and
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00:44:07.800 --> 00:44:14.199
figure out how you're going to do
that. Another one is feeling entitled to
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00:44:14.400 --> 00:44:22.239
information that you in a company.
It's really important. Particularly there's a really
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00:44:22.280 --> 00:44:24.199
interesting you know, I know we
don't have a time by some research that
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00:44:24.280 --> 00:44:30.400
shows that one of the reasons women
aren't picked for leadership positions is that they
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00:44:30.519 --> 00:44:35.119
don't have business acumen. In terms
of the company, you should be reading
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00:44:35.119 --> 00:44:43.079
the annual report, listening in on
earning calls, and just getting a sense
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00:44:43.119 --> 00:44:46.800
of what are the big company goals
and how can I be a part of
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00:44:46.840 --> 00:44:52.639
achieving them. You want to build
alliances as part of increasing your cloud.
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00:44:52.239 --> 00:44:55.760
This is a time where you should
be really getting to know people and other
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00:44:55.840 --> 00:45:00.320
departments supporting them, so they support
you. And just back to what I
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00:45:00.360 --> 00:45:05.559
said before, be not just a
change agent, be a risk agent.
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00:45:05.960 --> 00:45:10.920
Look for ways to disrupt, to
bring freshness and bold ideas into your company.
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00:45:13.239 --> 00:45:16.239
That was golden. I think you're
right that so many women don't really
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00:45:16.320 --> 00:45:20.360
have the business acumen that they need. And I think the alliances you talked
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00:45:20.360 --> 00:45:22.239
about was so important because a lot
of those people are going to be the
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00:45:22.239 --> 00:45:27.920
people that help usher you in and
up in organizations, those alliances, and
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00:45:27.960 --> 00:45:30.880
they take time and attention, Yeah, they do. So don't make the
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00:45:30.920 --> 00:45:36.920
mistake of burrowing in at your death
and keeping your nose close to the grindstone.
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That can look like it works because
it worked maybe when you were in
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00:45:40.519 --> 00:45:45.840
ninth grade, but it doesn't work
in the business world. You need to
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00:45:45.039 --> 00:45:50.920
be aware of your presence and the
company and what it's saying and what your
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00:45:51.079 --> 00:45:55.599
role is viewed at. So step
back and look at that. I want
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00:45:55.639 --> 00:45:59.199
to give you a chance to maybe
close the show with this, if you
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00:45:59.239 --> 00:46:02.480
will. We talk a lot about
the show about leadership helping companies grow and
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00:46:02.559 --> 00:46:07.719
change, and you've got something in
there about a gut's girl becomes a kick
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00:46:07.719 --> 00:46:12.440
ass boss. So what do you
mean by that? It's pretty much what
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00:46:12.760 --> 00:46:19.920
anyone would tell you. You want
to be clear about your vision. You
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00:46:19.960 --> 00:46:22.719
want to revisit your vision frequently,
you want to share it. You want
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00:46:22.800 --> 00:46:27.519
to set standards for the people who
work for you. You want to reward
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00:46:27.599 --> 00:46:30.280
them but most and you want to
be a good listener. So important.
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00:46:30.559 --> 00:46:34.960
But I think for me, one
of the things that I really enjoyed so
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00:46:35.079 --> 00:46:38.960
much at COSMO was being the kind
of boss that I felt fierce devotion from
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00:46:38.960 --> 00:46:43.920
the people who work for me.
And so many of those people are still
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00:46:44.360 --> 00:46:50.519
in my life as friends and mentees. And you do that by making them
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00:46:50.519 --> 00:46:54.320
feel passionate about the mission and what
they are going to learn from the mission.
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00:46:54.639 --> 00:47:00.079
And even though I knew sometimes I
was doing this giving away some of
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00:47:00.840 --> 00:47:05.239
the house secrets to people who would
go on and run other magazines. I
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00:47:05.360 --> 00:47:08.960
shared my philosophy with them, I
told them what I thought was a winning
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00:47:09.000 --> 00:47:15.400
cover line, I shared some of
the research. So they felt this job
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00:47:15.559 --> 00:47:20.159
was of value to them because they
were really learning a ton and could use
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00:47:20.199 --> 00:47:23.360
it, love it, and go
on from there and be a success in
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00:47:23.400 --> 00:47:28.239
a bigger way someplace else. One
day, you contributed them and you made
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00:47:28.239 --> 00:47:31.079
them bigger than they were than before
they found you. Yes, and there
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00:47:31.199 --> 00:47:37.400
is something so rewarding about that.
My former number two is now the editor
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00:47:37.400 --> 00:47:39.840
in chief of Cosmopolity, and I
just dropped her an email today. I
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00:47:39.920 --> 00:47:45.039
just loved this woman. She was
just so fantastic and the fact that I
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00:47:45.119 --> 00:47:49.639
get to still have her in my
life in a way so rewarding. And
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00:47:50.360 --> 00:47:54.079
one day somebody told me that three
women who were editors in chief who would
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00:47:54.079 --> 00:47:59.199
work for me ran into each other
at an event and they laughingly said,
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00:47:59.320 --> 00:48:06.880
yeah, we went to editor in
chief camp under boot camp under Kate White.
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00:48:07.239 --> 00:48:10.880
And that's what I love. The
idea that people saw is that if
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I work for her, I'm going
to be an editor in chief one day.
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00:48:15.199 --> 00:48:19.800
Oh my gosh, that's what you
want to do as a boss.
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00:48:19.840 --> 00:48:22.679
You want people to think this is
good for me. I love the mission
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00:48:22.760 --> 00:48:28.239
here, but it's also a value
to me in terms of my career.
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00:48:28.800 --> 00:48:32.320
And you can let them in on
your thinking so they walk out of your
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00:48:32.360 --> 00:48:38.119
office going she just shared with me
her best cover line writing tip, or
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00:48:38.360 --> 00:48:44.159
she just shared for me what kind
of celebrity really sells on the cover.
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00:48:44.280 --> 00:48:46.400
And I'm going to be able to
use that one day when I compete against
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00:48:46.480 --> 00:48:51.639
her. Oh my gosh, what
a great way to finish the show.
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00:48:51.719 --> 00:48:53.679
Kate, what a gift you are. I thank you so much for coming
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00:48:53.760 --> 00:48:58.400
on the show, sharing your wisdom, your passion, your expertise with the
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00:48:58.440 --> 00:49:01.760
listenership, and me say thank you. Alisa was wonderful. I bet you
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00:49:01.800 --> 00:49:07.360
were just the most fabulous guide for
women and coach for women, and boy,
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00:49:07.519 --> 00:49:10.679
I'd love to be one of your
clients one day. Other way around,
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00:49:10.760 --> 00:49:15.360
Kate, I'm gonna keep I'm gonna
keep after you, so listeners.
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If you want to learn more about
Kate White and her numerous books and what
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00:49:17.320 --> 00:49:22.599
she's up to, visit her website. It's www dot Kate White speaks dot
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00:49:22.639 --> 00:49:27.360
com. That's Kate White speaks dot
com. Join us next week when we
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00:49:27.400 --> 00:49:30.880
talk with Gwynn Rich, who is
truly working on purpose as she continues to
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00:49:30.920 --> 00:49:34.880
live, as she says, past
her expiration date as a breast cancer battler.
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00:49:35.119 --> 00:49:37.159
We'll be talking about what women can
do to prevent cancer and how she
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00:49:37.280 --> 00:49:42.159
is living a legacy for others in
her closing days on the planet. See
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00:49:42.159 --> 00:49:44.599
you then, remember that work is
at least one third of our life,
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00:49:44.679 --> 00:49:49.400
So let's work on Purpose. Well, you hope you've enjoyed this week's program.
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00:49:49.800 --> 00:49:52.800
Be sure to tune in to Working
on Purpose, featuring your host Alis
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00:49:52.880 --> 00:49:59.280
Cortes, each week on the Voice
America Empowerment Channel. This week, find
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00:49:59.360 --> 00:50:00.440
your life's purpose at work.





















































