The AIM Project: Putting a Real Face on Global Issues

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There are some people that make their
work just another thing they have to do,

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and there are those that make their
work something that they want to do.

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Welcome to Working on Purpose with your
host Elise Cortez. In our program,

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we provide guidance and inspiration from those
people who have found deeper meaning and

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personal connection to their work life.
It's beyond nine to five. It's working

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on Purpose. Now Here is your
host, Elise Cortez. I'm your host,

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Elise Cortez. Joining you live from
Dallas, Texas, which is home

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base for me. This program is
all about helping people more meaningfully and productively

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connect with their work and equipping leaders
to cultivate meaning and purpose in the workplace

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to elicit passion inspired contribution, innovation, and persevering performance. So I seek

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out and bring on guests with a
particular perspective, experience, or expertise that

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I think contributes to or expands this
conversation. And as a management consultant social

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scientist, I draw on the meeting
and work and identity research I've been doing

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over the last fifteen years, as
well as my experience consulting, speaking and

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developing workforces across the globe. I
hope you caught the show last week.

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If you missed it live, you
could always catch it via recorded podcast.

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We were on the air with Ronan
Leonard, who is the founder of Accountability

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and teach Us niche business owners and
subject matter experts how to leverage their intellectual

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property into additional revenue models and increase
their industry profile, all through the innovative

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concept of virtual masterminds. We talked
about the need for entrepreneurs and business owners

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to plug into groups of people who
have already faced the challenges or problems they

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currently face and get the support and
accountability check they need to realize their visions.

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He joined us from Melbourne, Australia. It was a great conversation with

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us. This week is Sharon Demattia. She is the founder of the AIM

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Project and also a connection and communication
expert, human re engineer and storyteller.

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She's just come back from a trip
from South Africa in service of her project.

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We'll be talking about that trip,
how the AIM Project was born,

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and why it is critical in addressing
some today's thornia school problems. She joined

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it today from Reno, Nevada.
Sharon, Welcome to Working on Purpose.

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Hello Elise, it's great to meet
here. It is so great to have

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you. You know. One of
the greatest things about getting to host the

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show, Sharon, is that I
stumble into people like you who I otherwise

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have no business in meeting, and
I get inspired and turned on by them,

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and I get to show them with
my listeners. It's amazing. It

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is great when you get out there
you meet incredible people. Yeah. Yeah,

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And so we're going to get into
really one of your latest adventures where

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you got to meet some great people. But I really want to get first

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into you your background at all,
how this thing was really born. So

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I want to dive in. I
think you're you're an interesting person to meet,

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Sharon, and that you're a scientist
turned artist, And we'll get to

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your previous background and encouraged it a
little bit later. But I want I

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want you to tell us, if
you will, of how and why the

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AIM project came to be. Well, let's see, it was about six

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years ago, and you know,
I was forty six at the time,

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and much like many of my peers, I had live a life of kind

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of predictable and meeting the expectations that
the system had set for me. I

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had a master's degree while I still
do. It's not that I had.

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It didn't go away. I'm educated, I worked a corporate job. I

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had a big house on the hill, the gated community, three children that

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went to private school, you know, BMW in the garage, living the

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you know, prescribed American dream,
and yet had that feeling inside me that

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was like, there's something missing,
there's something I'm supposed to be doing.

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I don't know what it is,
and I don't even know how to label

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it. And then it was,
you know, and I was reading,

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you know, to try to find
out. I was reading books and listening

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to podcasts trying to point me in
the direction of this purpose that I didn't

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even know what it was, or
how it exists or how to access it.

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And it was through my divorce that
that it really shook me up.

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It was as if my entire operating
system crashed. Every foundational belief upon which

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I based my life. It appeared
to be untrue, and I was lost.

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I was completely lost, in groundless, like had nothing to stand on

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anymore. All the stories that I
told myself were gone. And it was

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through a conversation with the identity crisis
right is where I was the existential crisis

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of you know, I don't think
it's an unusual thing for a woman in

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her mid forties anymore. And so
its conversation with my youngest son about identity

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because someone had been calling him names, and in trying to lead him to

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a greater understanding of who he was, I asked him because he'd loved to

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draw, I asked him, if
he was a blank canvas and I painted

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his outline on it, how would
he feel it? And it led to

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such an interesting conversation that I was
able to guide on just the drive home

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from school that I arrived home last
night, and that was the scientist in

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me that I understand that one of
the hardest things to do is find the

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right question. And this seemed so
interesting. And sat down that night and

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poured myself a big glass of wine, and I took out a canvas and

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without overthinking it, without allowing my
mind to take control, and it was

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almost like I was in such a
dark place that it didn't I had lost

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the control from my mind, and
I just drew this outline. It came

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from someplace I don't know, onto
the canvas, and it looked like the

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torso and head of a human.
It was just a single line, and

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then it came to do I put
a heart in it. And there was

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the part of me that was like, don't put the heart there. That

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seems so girly and the logical and
hello kitty, and you're none of those

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things. I had defined myself very
logically through my life and kind of wore

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that like a badge of honor.
You know. I didn't wasn't ruled by

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emotion, but I put it there. And as I filled in my own

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canvas, it started with the things
that I knew about myself, creative and

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intelligent and an athlete and all these
things that I felt very comfortable with.

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But when it came to my heart, I paused, and I remember it

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like it was yesterday. That sharply
in my hand and inside my head there

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was a voice that said, right, scare and another voice that said,

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you're not allowed to be that.
Don't do that. And the other voice

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came back and said, I dare
you to do it. You're terrified,

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Write it down. The other voice
said no, pull up your bootstraps and

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move forward. Do not be scared. And it was like my hand was

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shaking as I overcame that internal battle
and wrote scared right over my heart.

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And from there I allowed myself every
emotion that I had been denying for forty

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six years. Out came pain,
outcame loneliness and brokenness, and vulnerability and

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fear. And it was only after
that then the miracle happened that like flowers

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suddenly sprouted out of the portrait too, and this growth, and it was

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the best way I can describe it
is that I exhaled for the first time

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in many, many years, and
I hadn't even known I was holding my

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breath, and everything that was tight
became loose, and it was so powerful.

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I wanted to share it with the
world and started testing and prototyping.

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My kids did it, friends,
did it started to grow? And now

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there's over. You know, we're
approaching six thousand of these portraits. Yeah,

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Sharon, that was breathtakingly beautiful,
And what a great way to open

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this conversation. I want to say
two things if I can. First,

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I think it's really important that our
listeners hear what you said that here you

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had what on the outside looks like
should have been a perfect life, something

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that everybody aspires to have, and
yet you were. What was lacking was

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fulfillment and meaning. And what we
know, and you, as a scientist

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will get this better than most,
is that there is an inverse relationship relationship

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between wealth and well being in the
world. So the countries that have higher

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wealth have lower lower well being scores. So and then fulfillment comes with that.

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So you are illustrating that rit large. And then the second thing is,

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you know what a beautiful example you
are of a fifty two year old

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woman who has come into her own
and in part thanks to a divorce.

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And you and I spoke about that
on the phone when we were getting are

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getting acquainted for this conversation. I'm
fifty three and I wouldn't be doing the

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work that I'm doing now if I
was still married. There wouldn't have been

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a space for me to create that, and wasn't anything my ex husband did.

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I put myself in that box.
But I'm so grateful that I got

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the chance to come and play in
the sandbox because this is where I'm supposed

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to be. And it sounds like
you're where you're supposed to be too.

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Yeah, And I like that you
called it the sandbox because I talked to

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people about that in the workshops.
Is it's this return to the playground.

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Yes, and even you know,
the playground is where we establish trust and

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relationships and we don't ask people where
they're from and what they do. We

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just arrived together and we make things. That's right. You start playing and

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making things, creating things together,
that's right. So that's right. So

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that's exactly. And you and I
immediately got that about each other. And

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I really appreciate that you just right
out of the gate shared that with our

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listeners and opened this conversation in au
and authentic a way, which is where

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I want to come to next.
By the way, one of the things

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that really struck me about the way
that you write about what you're up to

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there is you get into this basic
need, this basic human need for authenticity

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in a world where it somehow gets
sacrificed for survival. We say more about

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that for us. Yeah, and
you know this is something that I absolutely

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so these portraits they're anonymous self portraits
of our internal dialogues, the things that

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we're afraid to ourselves, find their
say to ourselves and to other people,

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find their way out on canvas,
and they teach me a lot, and

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we have this basic human need to
be exactly who we are, you know,

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to be loved and accepted as who
we are. And yet there comes

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a time, and it happens very
very early in life and often from a

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place of love, that demand is
made to become something other than who you

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are in order to fit in,
you know, and fitting in isn't belonging,

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you know, and in that side
sacrifice of authenticity, that's like the

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first break of our heart. That's, oh, you mean, I don't

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get to be this thing? And
you know, and even me as a

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parent, we have our fears about
how our kids are going to be in

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the world, what does it mean
to be successful? And that definition is

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also often based on their parents,
and so we keep handing down these stories

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and expectations that aren't really necessarily realistic
or or ideal for that child. And

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so we start to become who we
think we're supposed to be instead of who

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we truly are. And that very
active fitting in blocks us from what we

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really want, which is to belong
And there's no we don't trust anymore.

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You look at business, you know, we demand authenticity and transparency and we

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want to work for people that we
trust. And yet if you run the

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surveys and look at them, we
don't believe our leaders are authentic. We

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certainly have huge trust problems in business, and the cost of that is productivity,

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efficiency and profit, you know,
and well being. At the end

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of the day, you know,
we don't feel good. We're not engaged

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in our lives and relationships. So
true, so true. And you know,

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for me, Sharon and you and
I spoke about this is part of

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what I'm up to in life is
to be able to help awaken the possibility

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of what an amazing like people really
can have, because I do see a

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lot of people walking through like completely
dead Monday through Friday. The switches off,

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then they turn on maybe Friday night
at about five thirty. And part

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of what I'm up to is to
help them see the magic and wonder in

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the possibility and how great their overall
life can be, including work. Well,

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it's true because in that it's like
we agree to a life of fear,

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you know, arguably, and today's
election day and look at our election

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campaigns, you know, the runoff
of fear and disconnection, yea, And

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when fear rules the narrative, its
questions our possibility because we're afraid to speak.

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I mean, yes, shuts down
communication. And even if you plug

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in at five thirty at night on
a Friday with your partner, how honest

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and trusting is the dialogue even there. Quite often some of the loneliest places

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in the world are our marriages,
and that's so true. So so I

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want to really presence this for our
listeners because what you're getting at it is

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just really so important. And that's
why one of the reasons I wanted to

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feature you on the show, Sharon, is because I think you're up to

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some really important work and addressing some
really awful, terrible global problems and so

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and you've written about this in a
way that I can't really speak to,

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so I want you to help me
out here. But you talk about this

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battle, this internal battle between craving
authenticity but feeling driven to be accepted into

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the tribe to survive, like you
spoke about before, and you say that

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that becomes our external war as judgment, cynicism, and fear that leads to

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anxiety, depression, and aggression.
Did I get that right? Yeah?

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Pretty much. I mean this disconnect
within so when from ourselves, it doesn't

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feel good. It feels really bad. And the portraits what you see is

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the hearts. They grow shadows,
they get put in cages, they become

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thorny, they get completely scribbled out, they get walls built around them.

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And this starts happening in middle school. And so it's like if I was

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to draw a parallel between, like, we crave connection, right, we

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design our lives around digital connections.
We go to coffee shops, we buy

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houses, we go on vacation based
on the fact that we can connect.

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And yet we've unplugged for our own
personal power source, you know, the

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heart, and it's all walled in, and our system is sluggish and not

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running and it's clouded, and yet
we tolerate it. We tolerate what we

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wouldn't tolerate from, you know,
like our phones. Oh my gosh,

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that sends us over the edge.
So the very connection that would define a

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meaningful life is missing, and that
doesn't feel good. The mouths gets stitched

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shut, that's super common. They're
gagged, they're stitched shut, the eyes

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are closed, they're dripping tears.
In high school, it says, I'm

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fine right over a mouth that is
stitched shut with a noose around its neck.

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I mean, it's vivid, and
it's redefining what is at risk.

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So when you don't feel good inside, you can't feel good outside. You're

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wearing this suit of armor everywhere that's
heavy. You're dragging yourself from place to

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place, trying to put on this
happy face. Susan David calls it.

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She wrote a book called The Emotional
Agility. She calls it the tyranny of

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positivity. And so we do not
allow our authentic voices to speak all of

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them, every emotion, and in
that this connection. Now we judge others

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that do we think they have what
we want, and of course we actually

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have it, everything we need.
We were born with it. We've just

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forgotten. And so like the outward
journey has to turn inward. We're so

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focused on what we can see outside, and yet there's this infinite wonderland on

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the inside that will set you free. It's nothing on the outside that's that

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removes the cage. It's all within, if that makes sense. So yeah,

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it does. And beautiful, beautiful
way for us to be able to

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presence, for you to be able
to presence. Really kind of where this

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came from and the suffering that's happening
in the world, that you've experienced,

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that you've seen in others. So
that's the first part of our conversation.

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Let's take a quick break, and
then after the conversation, let's get into

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what you're doing at the AIM Project, the what and the how. I'm

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your host, Alice Cortez, who
were on the air Sharon de Mattia.

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She is the founder of the AIM
Project and also a connection and communication expert,

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human re engineer, and storyteller.
She's just come back from a trip

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to South Africa in service of her
project. She noted today from Nevada,

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we've been talking a bit about the
problem that she's trying to address. After

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the break, we're going to talk
about her project and how she aims to

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help solve some of those problems.
Stay with us, we'll be right back.

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Elise Cortez is a speaker and engagement
and development catalyst. She designs and

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delivers professional development, leadership and engagement
workshops and can bring her expertise to your

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organization. She will help ignite meaningful
development within your workforce that will increase employee

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engagement, performance and retention to learn
more or to invite Elise to speak to

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00:17:38.960 --> 00:17:45.359
your organization. Please visit her at
www dot Elise Cortez dot com. She

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00:17:45.440 --> 00:17:56.599
would welcome the opportunity to help get
your employees working on purpose. This is

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working on Purpose with Elise Cortez.
To reach our program today, send an

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email to Elise ali Se at Elise
Cortez dot com. Now back to working

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on Purpose. If you're just joining
us, my guess is Sharon Dematia.

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She's the founder of the AIM Project
and also a connection and communication expert,

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human reengineer, and storyteller. I'm
your host, Elise Cortez. So,

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Sharon, before the break, we
were talking a bit about some of the

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instances, some of the things that
have elicited your your drive, your purpose

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to create the AIME Project, and
I really want to help our listeners understand

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some of the statistics that you've been
able to surface around the issues that you're

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trying to address. Will you share
some of that data with us? Sure?

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So, when we talked about this
disconnection from ourselves, you know this

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is in the internal war, are
you know, the internal battle becoming the

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external war? This is really evidenced
in the fact that depression has become the

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number one cause of global disability.
You know, shocking. You are better

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off smoking fifteen cigarettes a day than
being lonely. And loneliness can be perceived

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as either real or you know,
I'm alone together kind of thing or perceived

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loneliness or social isolation is the scientific
term port but it's an epidemic. SIGNA

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just published a study on the epidemic
of loneliness and that one and only like

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one in four people they don't they
don't have any confidence, they have no

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one to talk to, this feeling
of being alone. Suicide rates have increased

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by thirty percent since nineteen ninety nine, and shockingly, one of the biggest

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drivers is when you look at our
teenagers and if you just look at high

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schoolers, so ninth through twelfth grade, if I there's it's a total of

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thirty eight percent is the total that
in the next twelve months will seriously consider

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suicide. They will make a plan
or an attempt. So the breakdown goes

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like seventeen thirteen and eight percent or
an attempt, so they'll consider they will

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make a concrete plan or an attempt
to end their lives. And that doesn't

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include the cutting and all the other
different negative expressions that they experience. And

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if you translate that into numbers just
in California and Nevada alone, it's seven

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hundred and ninety seven thousand, five
hundred and forty high school students will feel

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that disconnected that they will want to
consider ending their lives in the next year.

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And so part of my thought is
if this was a virus and a

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physical virus in our system and we
could see it, I mean, look

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what we do for the bird flu
or mosquitoes, right, We're tracking it

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all and we've got our top scientists
on it, and we're demanding immunizations for

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things for looping cough and such.
And yet what are we doing. You

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know, this is such a scary
thing that we push it away. I

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don't know how to deal with this. I don't want to talk about it.

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This is emotions, and it's killing
us. It's killing our kids.

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The very people that are responsible for
creating our future are sick. And if

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they don't die from it in high
school, it's going to affect the rest

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of their lives, every relationship they
have, whether it be personal or professional.

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And we must act now. We
must can't push it away anymore.

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I think that the way that you
have explicated the problem is is unfortunately enormous,

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and really I am very keenly aware
of some of these numbers myself,

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which is part of the reason that
I'm out to help people find meaning and

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purpose and inspiration in their lives because
it helps counterbalance that whole empty vacuum of

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lack of connection at etc. And
so the work you're doing is all the

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more hugely important, Sharon. So
let's talk a little bit about just quickly

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about your background, because I want
that to be a basis of what when

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we talk about your project, what
you're doing there. So looking at you,

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you are a beautiful woman. You
are very fit, You scream vitality,

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You take good care of yourself.
You clearly are in touch with your

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emotions. You have this great scientific
background, and now we're getting into the

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artist space, and so will you
share just a bit about your scientific background

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and how you made the switch to
become both scientist and artist. Sure.

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So, first off, my dad
is a physicist, and you know,

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I was raised in logic. You
know, everything was very logical, and

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and then when I went to school, I have a master's in kinesiology and

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applied physiology, and I did.
I worked in an integrative vascular biology lab

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where we did human subjects research.
We did infusion studies in the brachial artery

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infusing different basoactive agents and measured nitric
oxide, bioavailability, vasio dilation, aging,

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hormone replacement, therapy, gender basically
like how do our arteries work?

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And I spun the blood down right, the essays, did the research for

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the grants that we needed to run
the fund the projects, so basically,

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and the good life of logic,
prediction and measurement and what I've learned and

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when the scientists came in, I
mean the artists came in at that place

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where all of that failed me,
where I learned that everything that mattered most

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in the world really was the logical, difficult to predict and merely impossible to

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measure. How do you measure love? It's infinite, you know, we

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don't even like that, you know, we like to think about an infinite

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universe, but it's hard to think
of that infinite love. And it is

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you know, it is, it
is that, and it's that which matters

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Sharon. That's so beautiful. So
to me, the way you encapsulated that

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is you're describing what I would like
to call a full human being, somebody

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who is able to tap into the
logic, the rationale, the scientific,

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as well as the spirit and the
emotion and still live in the question mark

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that says, I don't have to
have the answers for everything right. The

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freedom for me came in being wrong. Oh my gosh, I mean I

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get to be wrong. Yes,
there is so much freedom in not knowing,

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embracing the mystery. We love it
in our movies and books, but

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when it comes to our lives,
it's like we want to read the last

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page. We want to have the
whole spirit. No one's going to end

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before we've even embark on it.
And how boring is that? And that

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is tragic because it's like we've got
Yes, it is tragic. Yes,

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talk about it differently, not as
fear, but as embracing the mystery,

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living on the edge of it.
You know, like to look at that

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at other people, but why not
ourselves on the other side of fear.

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You've got to walk through it,
not away from it. I totally get

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that. So now now we've we've
surfaced a bit about your background and the

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reason I wanted to do that In
part shared is because obviously I know you

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better than my listeners do. So
far, most my listeners and I can

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see you, and I want to
make sure that they understand that we're not

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just talking about some fluffy topic here. This is really important stuff, and

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you, as a scientist, are
bringing to bear that background as well as

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everything else you've learned from the emotional, spiritual place, and I think that's

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just an artistic space. I think
it's really important that our listeners understand that

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you're coming at this from what I've
considered to be a pretty complete package.

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So that's the reason I wanted to
have that conversation. Yeah, yes,

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for sure. I think that that's
a big part of my value is that

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I've lived both sides of a lot
of different coins and and that I bring

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that all into what I do now. I've lived a lot of worlds,

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and I'm really grateful that I have
because I can stand in front of a

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lot of different groups of people and
connect where they are. I know just

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how they feel, and you can
you can speak their language, and so

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so now when I look at the
AIM project and mind, you have a

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ton to learn about that, and
I'm learning as we talk in this conversation.

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But it seems to me, and
you correct me where I'm wrong,

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that the AIM Project is part movement, part thought leadership, part real world

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workshops. So what's the purpose of
the AIM Project and how do you like

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to talk about it? Yeah,
that took a while because it was so

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big. How do I fit it
into a sentence? But especially what I

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do? So people always want to
know where you're from and what do you

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do? And it was easy to
say I was a scientist, right and

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but now what I realize what I
do is I give people permission and a

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space to be themselves. And the
purpose of the AIM Project is great to

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break down walls that we build within
ourselves between each other and open these dialogues

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on the other side of our fear. And you know, the global vision

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is to you know, turn the
whole world into this gallery of our shared

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humanity where we are accessing the power
within our diversity. Instead of letting fear

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push us away, come together and
in that space, a fearless, courageous

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space, we will create solutions for
the the you know, for this expanding

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world that is arguably really chaotic and
confusing. Right now, I agreed and

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to agree. I certainly agree it's
in confusing and we're both up to work

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to try to address that. And
so to that end, we've been waiting

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and waiting. I've been waiting and
waiting to hear about your stint in South

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Africa. You and I spoke before
you went to South Africa for the project,

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So tell us about how this visit
to South Africa happened, how it

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came about, and what happened while
you were there. Tell us. I

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went with an organization called Amplify Africa, which was a group in the US

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that was organized by an expat so
a woman that grew up in South Africa

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that now owned a business in Reno, and her vision was to kind of

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create this cross cultural networking community,
and so we worked with We did a

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women's summit in Stellenbosch and we worked
with, Oh my gosh, the most

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incredible people from people. Women flew
in from Zimbabwe and we had those from

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Uganda and a transgender entrepreneur from Bella, Bella township that you know, it

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was incredible, all the people that
came together. We worked at different foundations

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within Cape town a primary school within
a township in the northwest territory and we

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just they blew my mind. I
had just my mind absolutely blown, because

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you know, there they are really
collaborative. They have to find solutions.

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So they're only twenty four years post
apartheid, so it's a very new dynamic

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and in order really to survive,
they have to come together, especially women

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and then women of color, they
have to come together and in a way

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that they come up with creative approaches
to business and everything there is about social

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impact. Everything is about empowering education
so they can rise above this story that

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they've been living. And they dance, they sing, they do all the

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things that we It's like we've forgotten
how to do that. You know,

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we stand against walls at our dances, and these guys are out there dancing

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and talking and hug and and it's
not I just it flips on its end,

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this idea of who's the teacher and
who's the student. You know,

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they would sit there and think that
we had everything. We have all these

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resources that we have wealth and education
and all of these things. Yet we

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are disconnected. We've lost community,
we've stripped ourselves of social bonding. We

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don't dance and we don't sing so
much. You know, anymore, we're

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afraid too. So they almost have
what we want and we have what they

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want, you know, and so
opening up and learning from each other,

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you know, sharing these resources is
just part of the vision. They're so

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inspiring. You know. One little
girl stood up in front and told her

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story and she said, I have
wings and I fly. Oh you do,

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and I can be whatever I want
and and she can. She can

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when you believe that you can.
And then we hear stories about that all

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the time. It's absolutely incredible and
inspiring. There was one boy at the

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school that stood up and looked at
me and the women I was with from

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the US, and said, do
you like to be the black people?

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And it was like, this is
a dream come true. It's a dream

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which I'm so inspired by and grateful
for the opportunity to be with everybody in

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a place beyond the judgment that I
used to have because I used to have

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it. I mean I lived it
too. I didn't know. And yeah,

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they are our teachers. They teached
me all the time, and I'm

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so grateful for that. How beautiful, how absolutely beautiful. And so what

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was the format was it? Was
it a workshop? Was it a conference?

409
00:31:52.880 --> 00:31:55.839
Was it a conversation. It was
all of those. Like at the

410
00:31:56.279 --> 00:32:00.759
Women's Summit, we had speakers.
We had it was two and a half

411
00:32:00.839 --> 00:32:07.559
days really, so different speakers from
both South Africa and the US spoke on

412
00:32:07.680 --> 00:32:16.039
topics. I talked about what I
do and then and just storytelling. That's

413
00:32:16.039 --> 00:32:22.720
how we connect right here, this
is that's how we connect and make sense

414
00:32:22.720 --> 00:32:29.480
of our world. So a lot
of different entrepreneurs that have been successful and

415
00:32:29.559 --> 00:32:34.279
pushed past their fear. The theme
was pushing your boundaries on the other side

416
00:32:34.279 --> 00:32:39.039
of fear. So and then the
next day we did we did we did

417
00:32:39.079 --> 00:32:45.440
portraits and then talked about them.
And that's what happened. In we went

418
00:32:45.519 --> 00:32:52.000
to a place called Kids Positive where
the next day where women that are all

419
00:32:52.160 --> 00:32:57.079
HIV positive they create you can see
some of the bead work here. They

420
00:32:57.160 --> 00:33:02.440
create beaded artwork, including things you
can use like lanyards for meeting their meetings

421
00:33:02.440 --> 00:33:07.440
and such. They're beautiful and they
do it and it raises money for their

422
00:33:07.480 --> 00:33:13.079
healthcare and to support their families.
And then we went to the Amy Foundation

423
00:33:13.160 --> 00:33:19.160
the same thing. It's teaching women
from these townships that don't have much how

424
00:33:19.200 --> 00:33:23.000
to sew and be resourceful and giving
them the tools that they need to grow

425
00:33:23.440 --> 00:33:29.119
and they too. You know again, we just sat and we told stories

426
00:33:29.240 --> 00:33:34.759
and we used art as that medium
of expressing ourselves and feeling good about the

427
00:33:34.799 --> 00:33:40.039
places that we are and setting some
goals for where we're going. The school

428
00:33:40.240 --> 00:33:47.440
was amazing, amazing, a classroom
of sixty kids, one teacher, and

429
00:33:49.759 --> 00:33:53.640
that was probably the most inspirational.
The energy in that room was amazing.

430
00:33:54.359 --> 00:33:59.880
They have their artwork. I've also
done it in Kenyatt has messages like mouth

431
00:34:00.160 --> 00:34:06.160
to the speechless, I will live
a life without regret. Yeah, I

432
00:34:06.240 --> 00:34:08.440
want to give back. All that
matters in a human being's heart is a

433
00:34:08.519 --> 00:34:15.159
type of seeds that are planted.
Their hearts aren't engages or barming. They

434
00:34:15.159 --> 00:34:17.880
don't have shoes on their feet,
and many of them have lost their parents,

435
00:34:17.960 --> 00:34:23.519
but they come together in a different
way that is absolutely gorgeous. Gorgeous.

436
00:34:23.760 --> 00:34:27.360
Oh, Sharon. On that note, let's grab a quick break,

437
00:34:27.679 --> 00:34:29.519
our last break here, and then
I want to get I want to ask

438
00:34:29.599 --> 00:34:31.599
you one another question about your experience
there. So hold on, hold,

439
00:34:31.880 --> 00:34:36.559
hold your thought in your heart for
just a moment. I'm your host,

440
00:34:36.559 --> 00:34:38.360
Alice Cortez, who do on the
air of Sharon Dematia, who is the

441
00:34:38.400 --> 00:34:43.639
founder of the AIM Project and she
was also a communication excuse me, a

442
00:34:43.639 --> 00:34:47.519
connection and communication expert, human re
engineer and storyteller. She's just come back

443
00:34:47.559 --> 00:34:51.679
from South Africa in the service of
her project. Sheow just a day from

444
00:34:51.679 --> 00:34:53.920
Reno, Nevada. After the break, We're going to get more into where

445
00:34:53.960 --> 00:34:57.679
this project is going. How maybe
you can help stay with us. We'll

446
00:34:57.719 --> 00:35:12.280
be right back. Elise Cortez is
a speaker and engagement and development catalyst.

447
00:35:12.440 --> 00:35:16.880
She designs and delivers professional development,
leadership and engagement workshops and can bring her

448
00:35:16.920 --> 00:35:22.039
expertise to your organization. She will
help ignite meaningful development within your workforce that

449
00:35:22.079 --> 00:35:28.039
will increase employee engagement, performance and
retention. To learn more or to invite

450
00:35:28.039 --> 00:35:32.320
Elise to speak to your organization,
please visit her at www dot Elise Cortez

451
00:35:32.480 --> 00:35:37.239
dot com. She would welcome the
opportunity to help get your employees working on

452
00:35:37.320 --> 00:35:49.599
purpose. This is working on Purpose
with Elise Cortez. To reach our program

453
00:35:49.599 --> 00:35:54.840
today, send an email to Elise
ali Se at Elise Cortez dot com.

454
00:35:54.840 --> 00:36:00.440
Now back to working on Purpose.
If you're just tuning in, my guest

455
00:36:00.440 --> 00:36:04.440
is Sharon De Mattia. She's the
founder of the Aim Project and also a

456
00:36:04.440 --> 00:36:07.719
connection and communication expert, human re
engineer, and storyteller. I'm your host,

457
00:36:07.760 --> 00:36:12.559
Alice Cortez. So, Sharon,
there's I'm sure so much more you

458
00:36:12.559 --> 00:36:15.119
could tell us about that trip in
South Africa, and I'm quite certain you're

459
00:36:15.119 --> 00:36:20.840
going to be processing that experience for
some time, but I'm really interested to

460
00:36:20.840 --> 00:36:25.280
hear what did you really take away
from that experience? Well, it really

461
00:36:27.519 --> 00:36:35.239
confirmed a dream beyond what I could
imagine. You know, what I've learned

462
00:36:35.320 --> 00:36:38.920
is that whatever it is that we
believe about ourselves will determine how we experience

463
00:36:38.960 --> 00:36:45.599
our lives. So it's really important
to know what we believe. And through

464
00:36:45.639 --> 00:36:50.360
this project, you know, I
say, there's this shared humanity, this

465
00:36:50.599 --> 00:36:57.119
story that is behind our skin,
that that you know, we are all

466
00:36:57.119 --> 00:37:00.800
connected, we are all the same. We just want to be love and

467
00:37:00.840 --> 00:37:06.360
belong as exactly who we are,
to be able to become what we imagine

468
00:37:06.440 --> 00:37:12.000
or believe or dream about, or
at least work towards it. But when

469
00:37:12.119 --> 00:37:21.239
we recognize that shared space, and
in these portraits you see you just see

470
00:37:21.480 --> 00:37:27.239
all the emotions on the display that
make us human. This integrated human.

471
00:37:27.280 --> 00:37:31.159
Like we talked about, there is
nothing we can't do when the power held

472
00:37:31.199 --> 00:37:37.119
within our diversity, and what we
can accomplish from a place of love and

473
00:37:37.159 --> 00:37:44.400
compassion rather than allowing fear to silence
our voice and our possibility is beyond measure

474
00:37:44.559 --> 00:37:47.360
or anything that we can imagine.
You know, Like when I say my

475
00:37:47.440 --> 00:37:52.320
mind was blown, my mind is
blown. And I'm so encouraged by what

476
00:37:52.440 --> 00:37:57.519
I saw and what I continue to
see here in the United States. These

477
00:37:57.639 --> 00:38:00.400
kids that I work with here,
they want contribute, they want to be

478
00:38:00.559 --> 00:38:07.119
more than the story that we're telling. I so appreciate what you're what you're

479
00:38:07.159 --> 00:38:08.440
saying, and I do want to
say something. And this is just my

480
00:38:08.480 --> 00:38:12.159
perspective. You sort of may not
agree with it, but when you talk

481
00:38:12.199 --> 00:38:15.199
about coming into a space and really
navigating it from love and compassion, I

482
00:38:15.239 --> 00:38:19.880
think that generally is more of a
position that more women than men would take.

483
00:38:21.079 --> 00:38:23.719
And I think that's one of the
reasons that women make great leaders is

484
00:38:23.760 --> 00:38:28.280
we bring something to the party that
and men bring great things to the party

485
00:38:28.280 --> 00:38:30.119
too. This is not to say
that they don't, we just do it

486
00:38:30.159 --> 00:38:32.800
differently. I couldn't help noticing when
I went to go cast my bellot today

487
00:38:32.800 --> 00:38:37.599
at the voting polls that the vast
majority of people running for office today are

488
00:38:37.639 --> 00:38:39.840
women in my state down here in
Dallas, Texas. I was amazed by

489
00:38:39.840 --> 00:38:45.719
that. So I just really want
to applaud that you're putting out there into

490
00:38:45.760 --> 00:38:51.360
the universe this whole place of love
and appreciation and seeing what's possible in people.

491
00:38:51.400 --> 00:38:54.280
I am too, and I think
it's really important to help heal some

492
00:38:54.440 --> 00:38:58.960
of the suffering in the world today. Well, thank you, Leeds.

493
00:38:59.280 --> 00:39:02.880
I do agree with you. And
one of the things that I've been told,

494
00:39:02.960 --> 00:39:07.360
and one of my fears was actually
to say the word love. Is

495
00:39:07.679 --> 00:39:10.599
like, oh my gosh, what
will people think if I say love?

496
00:39:10.639 --> 00:39:14.440
And compassion, Oh my gosh,
empathy. They're going to think I'm so

497
00:39:14.480 --> 00:39:22.239
emotional and that we have actually used
the emotion as a way to silence people

498
00:39:23.119 --> 00:39:28.519
want this stripped down logical world,
and yet it's not serving us. Look

499
00:39:28.519 --> 00:39:32.880
at the statistics. It does not
serve us. Creativity and innovation come from

500
00:39:32.880 --> 00:39:38.800
the soul, and it's a little
messy sometimes, but but we don't have

501
00:39:38.840 --> 00:39:43.840
to be afraid of it. You
can be confused, you can have pain,

502
00:39:44.400 --> 00:39:46.679
you can have all those things.
And love them because that's what makes

503
00:39:46.760 --> 00:39:53.119
us human. That's that's the experience. Yeah. Well, and to your

504
00:39:53.119 --> 00:39:59.159
point, I have a friend who
who is very much about authenticity, Kimberly

505
00:39:59.199 --> 00:40:01.960
Davis, who wrote Leadership, and
she talks about how, you know,

506
00:40:02.280 --> 00:40:05.880
you do put yourself out there in
the world when you are authentic, and

507
00:40:06.000 --> 00:40:08.960
it does take bravery of sorts to
do that, and I agree with that,

508
00:40:09.119 --> 00:40:13.119
and it's so worth it, it's
so worth it, but it does

509
00:40:13.199 --> 00:40:15.679
take something from us. Well,
Renee Brown says, I mean my first

510
00:40:15.719 --> 00:40:20.519
portrait when I displayed it, because
I displayed it and I had a party

511
00:40:20.559 --> 00:40:22.840
and I had everyone come look at
my fear and I had a quote from

512
00:40:22.880 --> 00:40:27.159
Berne Brown that said, you know, and this is six years ago,

513
00:40:27.599 --> 00:40:35.079
and it said owning your story is
the bravest thing that you could ever do.

514
00:40:37.440 --> 00:40:40.559
And again, you know, you
have to like it's courageous. That

515
00:40:40.800 --> 00:40:46.519
is courage is defined by risk,
uncertainty, and vulnerability. You've got to

516
00:40:46.519 --> 00:40:50.280
be comfortable with not knowing what's going
to happen, and you have to take

517
00:40:50.320 --> 00:40:54.039
that risk because the reward is your
freedom. The reward for the risk of

518
00:40:54.159 --> 00:40:59.039
letting yourself be seen is freedom.
And that's what all want. We fight

519
00:40:59.119 --> 00:41:02.079
for it. Yes, on both
sides of the aisle too, by the

520
00:41:02.079 --> 00:41:07.320
way, both for it and against
it. Well, I want to talk

521
00:41:07.360 --> 00:41:09.880
about where this bus is going.
Right. So, you've got some really

522
00:41:09.880 --> 00:41:14.199
amazing strong wind under your sales here
already in the AIM Project, and I

523
00:41:14.280 --> 00:41:17.719
know you care deeply you're in this. I got that, You've got curiosity,

524
00:41:17.760 --> 00:41:22.000
you're all about really in there,
and the love is totally there.

525
00:41:22.000 --> 00:41:25.280
I can totally see that. I
love that you're all about expanding the field

526
00:41:25.280 --> 00:41:29.960
of human possibility and freedom. So
where do you want to see the AIM

527
00:41:29.960 --> 00:41:32.639
Project go? Well? Okay,
So what I love about it is it

528
00:41:32.679 --> 00:41:37.360
doesn't exist except for the energy and
the participation of the nearly six thousand people

529
00:41:37.400 --> 00:41:43.920
now that have created and shared their
stories in a really raw way. It's

530
00:41:43.960 --> 00:41:47.400
a lot of energy, and I've
had a lot of support, but most

531
00:41:47.440 --> 00:41:51.079
of it has been self funded.
You know. I went and I've pretty

532
00:41:51.119 --> 00:41:54.039
much sold everything because with each hub
it was like, well I can't get

533
00:41:54.079 --> 00:41:59.280
this up, and I keep doing
it, but it's time for us as

534
00:41:59.320 --> 00:42:04.480
communities to step forward. I have
a whole curriculum that I bring into schools.

535
00:42:04.519 --> 00:42:09.920
I just worked with the most incredible
marching band in Phoenix, Arizona,

536
00:42:10.039 --> 00:42:15.280
and they chose for their show theme. Their competition theme was called Behind the

537
00:42:15.360 --> 00:42:21.840
Mirror and it was all about depression
and it was incredible to work with these

538
00:42:21.920 --> 00:42:25.159
kids for three hours to read they
wrote what you know? I ask them

539
00:42:25.199 --> 00:42:31.079
to notice and wonder and what do
you want people to know? And they

540
00:42:31.159 --> 00:42:36.960
talk about like revealing themselves like I've
never said this to people before. I'm

541
00:42:37.000 --> 00:42:39.000
confused. I want you to know. I want help, you know,

542
00:42:39.119 --> 00:42:43.639
and they're begging for it and their
portraits. So it's really important that we

543
00:42:43.679 --> 00:42:47.000
support these kids, let them know
they're not alone, let them, keep

544
00:42:47.039 --> 00:42:52.719
them connected to themselves, because that
is the best way to navigate the chaos

545
00:42:52.199 --> 00:42:59.800
is create this self aware, integrated
whole person that despite all the all the

546
00:43:00.199 --> 00:43:02.639
pulling in the different directions, has
a place, a centered place, a

547
00:43:02.639 --> 00:43:07.400
compass, an internal compass with which
to navigate it. So that curriculum is

548
00:43:07.440 --> 00:43:14.199
really important, and so we have
to move energy in that way, bringing

549
00:43:14.199 --> 00:43:19.159
me to organizations and schools. That's
great. Funding them. I have a

550
00:43:19.199 --> 00:43:22.599
Patreon, a site where people for
as little as a dollar a day,

551
00:43:23.000 --> 00:43:28.000
five dollars a dollar a month.
I'm sorry, five dollars a month,

552
00:43:28.039 --> 00:43:34.679
a cup up coffee a month by
some people. Yeah, this is important

553
00:43:34.679 --> 00:43:37.519
to me. I care about everyone's
at risk. Six and a half million

554
00:43:37.719 --> 00:43:44.119
high school students will consider make a
plan or an attempt to kill themselves this

555
00:43:44.199 --> 00:43:47.840
year. Do you have five dollars
to put towards this solution that I'm creating,

556
00:43:49.079 --> 00:43:53.039
this human net that holds itself,
Because if you have to go with

557
00:43:53.079 --> 00:43:58.039
an ad based model or I've got
to look to corporate funding, they're shaping

558
00:43:58.039 --> 00:44:00.679
the project, and I believe that
we should shape the project. I want

559
00:44:00.719 --> 00:44:07.280
to listen to and interact with the
people that the project is. I'm just

560
00:44:07.360 --> 00:44:12.880
the condulit. I'm the spokesperson.
So if you go to my Patreon site,

561
00:44:12.880 --> 00:44:17.719
which is patreon dot com the AIM
Project, you can interact with me

562
00:44:17.800 --> 00:44:23.079
there, send me messages, subscribe. It's a subscription based model. Please

563
00:44:23.559 --> 00:44:27.599
join me. You can keep living
your life, you can keep doing what

564
00:44:27.639 --> 00:44:31.719
you do, but throw a little
energy this way because it will expand exponentially.

565
00:44:32.880 --> 00:44:37.199
Beautiful. That is so well said
and articulated, Sharon gorgeous. So

566
00:44:37.280 --> 00:44:42.280
we're getting very close to being out
of time here. It's very clear to

567
00:44:42.320 --> 00:44:45.440
me that you are living and working
from purpose, And of course, you

568
00:44:45.480 --> 00:44:47.280
know, what I'm trying to do
is help others awaken to that possiblity for

569
00:44:47.320 --> 00:44:52.199
themselves as well. So help our
understand, help our listeners understand what is

570
00:44:52.239 --> 00:44:54.360
that experience like, what does it
feel like? What's it like to live

571
00:44:54.360 --> 00:45:00.760
and work on purpose? You know
what I've learned is everything that we've ever

572
00:45:00.800 --> 00:45:05.119
imagined in our lives lies on the
other side of our fear. We just

573
00:45:05.159 --> 00:45:09.320
have to tell a different story about
it, and continually over. I would

574
00:45:09.360 --> 00:45:15.599
never go back over and over again. You know, as little as seven

575
00:45:15.679 --> 00:45:17.760
years ago, I never could imagine
this dream that I'm living. I'm pinching

576
00:45:17.880 --> 00:45:21.280
myself, you know, like,
oh my gosh, are you kidding?

577
00:45:21.360 --> 00:45:23.719
Like this exists? And it does, and it's right next to you.

578
00:45:24.320 --> 00:45:31.039
Like it's not parallel, it's not. It's one leads to this to this.

579
00:45:31.239 --> 00:45:35.519
You just have to look that far. You just have to open the

580
00:45:35.559 --> 00:45:38.320
door just next to the one that
you keep going through. There's this other

581
00:45:38.320 --> 00:45:43.480
door, and then there's six mores
and so there's kind of like this parallel

582
00:45:43.599 --> 00:45:49.079
existence that is accessible to all if
you're willing to just be courageous and walk

583
00:45:49.199 --> 00:45:53.360
through your fear, not to ignore
it but through it, and it is

584
00:45:53.559 --> 00:46:00.239
the most incredible experience to feel that
what you do has some sort of impact

585
00:46:00.840 --> 00:46:06.360
on somebody thinking just a little bit
differently about themselves in a way that it

586
00:46:06.480 --> 00:46:09.760
leads them to a better future possibility. There is nothing better in the world,

587
00:46:10.079 --> 00:46:15.880
nothing, you know. For me, it gives me, and I

588
00:46:15.920 --> 00:46:17.599
think you're talking about this, it
gives me courage to do things that I

589
00:46:17.639 --> 00:46:22.199
would just never have done before.
By living and working in purpose, the

590
00:46:22.280 --> 00:46:28.800
energy is totally different. I'm amazed
by how long and hard I can work

591
00:46:29.440 --> 00:46:34.159
and what I go after. And
then there's also this strange confidence that comes

592
00:46:34.159 --> 00:46:37.440
with that. It's just that I
know I'm being governed from a place of

593
00:46:37.480 --> 00:46:42.400
purpose, and I trust that,
and it's incredibly centering. Yeah, you

594
00:46:42.440 --> 00:46:45.199
know, there's this thing about trust
and faith. We talk about it and

595
00:46:45.239 --> 00:46:47.519
yet we don't practice it, and
we are parts of nature, we are

596
00:46:47.559 --> 00:46:52.519
not separate from it. And a
tree just courageously grows wherever its seed lands.

597
00:46:53.159 --> 00:46:58.400
You know, we have the greatest
of freedom and choice, and we

598
00:46:58.480 --> 00:47:02.320
can be courageous in that expression of
everything that we are. You know,

599
00:47:05.280 --> 00:47:07.719
we just have to grow and spread
our wings, you know, fly like

600
00:47:08.360 --> 00:47:15.079
metamorphosis, you know, the kind
of cliche caterpillar to the butterfly doesn't know

601
00:47:15.159 --> 00:47:17.239
it's going to fly the first time. It just spreads its wings and doesn't.

602
00:47:19.000 --> 00:47:21.719
And that's what we're meant to do, if we can get out of

603
00:47:21.719 --> 00:47:24.559
our own way. Yes, ma'am, I agree with them, and here

604
00:47:24.559 --> 00:47:28.400
we are. I like to give
my guests the last word, if you

605
00:47:28.440 --> 00:47:30.880
will share. And you've said so
many wonderful things, but saying about thirty

606
00:47:30.920 --> 00:47:35.760
seconds, what would you like to
leave our listeners with. I am really

607
00:47:35.760 --> 00:47:38.199
grateful for this moment that I've spent
here with you, Elise, for the

608
00:47:38.239 --> 00:47:44.559
support that I've had in the connections
and the people that have contributed to what

609
00:47:44.719 --> 00:47:50.760
I've done. And I encourage you
to become a part of something bigger than

610
00:47:50.800 --> 00:47:53.480
yourself, because it will lead you
to where you never could have imagined you

611
00:47:53.519 --> 00:47:59.599
could go. It's incredible. Thank
you for all your support. Thank you

612
00:47:59.639 --> 00:48:02.719
for airing your beautiful heart, soul
and mind with us today and sharing your

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energy what you're up to with the
AIM Project, letting us know how we

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can help and get involved. Sharon, thank you for being a guest.

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Thank you at least for having me. I really appreciate it. If you

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want to learn more about Sharon Demattia
or The Aim Project, visit the website.

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00:48:15.559 --> 00:48:22.159
It's the Aim Project dot Net Again
the Aim Project dot Net. Next

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00:48:22.159 --> 00:48:24.840
week, we'll be on the air
with Phil Sautuk of DPMC North America to

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learn why companies and leaders need to
pay attention to purpose and how some are

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unleashing it to produce increased commitment and
motivation within the organization and to improve financial

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results. See you there. Remember
that work is at least a third of

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our lives, so let's work on
purpose. Well you hope you've enjoyed this

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week's program. Be sure to tune
in to Working on Purpose featuring your host

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00:48:45.920 --> 00:48:52.199
Alas Cortez, each week on the
Voice America Empowerment Channel. This week,

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00:48:52.519 --> 00:48:53.880
find your life's purpose at work.