Jan. 1, 2020

Change a Life in a Single Conversation

Change a Life in a Single Conversation

Want to make a profound difference in this one, precious life you’ve been granted? Learn how to change someone’s life for the better in a single conversation. It will take a certain mindset, a clear heart, and being fully present, among other...

Want to make a profound difference in this one, precious life you’ve been granted? Learn how to change someone’s life for the better in a single conversation. It will take a certain mindset, a clear heart, and being fully present, among other essentials discussed in this episode. And sometimes timing is critical – being able to have this kind of dialogue with someone in their hardest times can be incredibly valuable. The world needs more people who can change a life in a single conversation. Are you – or can you become – one of them?

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There are some people that make their
work just another thing they have to do,

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and there are those that make their
work something that they want to do.

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Welcome to Working on Purpose with your
host Elise Cortes. In our program,

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we provide guidance and inspiration from those
people who have found deeper meaning and

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personal connection to their work life.
It's beyond nine to five. It's working

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on Purpose. Now Here is your
host, Elise Cortes. Welcome back to

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Working on Purpose show. Thanks for
tuning again this week. I'm your host,

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Elise Cortes. Join you live from
Dallas, which is home base for

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me. If you've been tuning in
for a while, you know this program

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is all about helping people create more
meaningful and purposeful lives and equipping leaders inside

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organizations to make work a rich and
compelling part of life so employees thrive,

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give their best performance, and want
to stay. I talk with my guest

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to draw on their expertise and share
my own experience consulting, speaking and developing

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workforces across the globe. Each week. In these conversations, I hope you

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walk away with something you can immediately
put to use and if I can do

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anything to help you along your journey. Go to my website at at leastcoretes

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dot com and use the contact me
future to message me. Let's open a

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conversation and explore what's going on for
you and how I might be able to

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help. Whether you want to learn
how they're vitally inspired living and leading from

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purpose, leadership program or consulting can
help you develop you and your team's efficacy

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in motivating your team to give their
best while creating a meaning infused culture in

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your organization. You want to see
about joining a cash fire online community to

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stoke your own passion, inspiration or
purpose discovery, or provide this as a

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gift and benefit to your team.
You want to learn more or recommend a

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woman to submit her story to the
Women's Anthology. I am curating collecting stories

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from women across the globe who are
up to something. It's called passionately striving

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in why women who pursuve your mindly
to live their purpose. Or finally,

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you'd like me to speak for your
company or conference at any rate. I'm

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glad we're connected and thanks for listening. Now onto this week's program with us

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today is Justin mccorkol. He is
the director of Business development for Tauras Cyber.

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Previously, he worked in the ministry, where he spent twelve years as

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a preacher, guiding church growth and
delivering church leadership seminars around the United States

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and in Central America. He's also
worked in the political arena as a speech

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writer, campaign coordinator, and state
delegate for various officials and candidates in the

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state and national levels. He joins
us today from Dallas, justin. Welcome

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to Working on Purpose. Thank you
very much. It's really an honor to

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be here with you. Eli Well, thank you, and I want to

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share with our listeners how we found
each other. It's always nice to know

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how people come into my sphere.
You were minding your own business and you

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were in the recipient of a speech
I gave to a group that you're a

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part of here in Dallas, and
you heard my message and we connected.

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It was around meaning, passion,
inspiration, and purpose, and you,

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of course just got it. And
that is where we developed really a friendship

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here out of this, and I
knew that we could create a powerful conversation

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around the importance of having conversations that
really make a difference in people's lives.

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And so that's the focus of today's
conversation listeners, and you get to you

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get a special little insight into this
man's world, and he's really accumulated quite

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a lot of experience over his few
years on the planet. So you're ready,

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absolutely, Okay. So this idea
of what I wanted to talk with

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you about, Justin, came from
reading your beautiful blog and I found one

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of your conversations about the possibility of
changing someone's life, of really making a

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profound difference in just one conversation.
So that's what I want to really explore

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deeply in this conversation because, as
you know, Justin, so much of

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what I'm up to is to help
people really really live that rich, meaningful

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life, and having powerful conversations that
can alter the course of a person's life

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is pretty big. Talk about impact. Absolutely, yeah, It's not to

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be taken lightly, the ability that
we have with our words to affect someone

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in a deep and meaningful way.
And I think sometimes in our mind we

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view people who come into content with
as well, there's passers through, right

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they We're only going to be there
for just a little while. So if

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I just have an opportunity to sit
down with this person and speak to them

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for a few minutes. Generally,
conversations are kept shallow. We don't really

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open up to one another, we
don't connect, so they just go on

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about their day. We do the
same. We walk away say hey,

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that was a nice person, and
they say the same thing about us.

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But at the end, there was
no real impact. I'm not saying that

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every conversation that we have is going
to be this tremendous life changing event for

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someone, but I think we have
to recognize the possibility that every conversation we

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go into can have that profound of
an effect. Yeah, indeed, and

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certainly I hope and well, I
have been in the recipient of people who

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reach out to me after I've I've
been out speaking it and saying, oh

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my gosh, I something awakened in
me when you came out to speak.

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And of course that's what I want. I want people to be awakened when

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I speak. But it isn't just
the plan to conversations that can make a

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big difference. I think we can
all look at our own lives and conjure

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something where one conversation like totally made
a difference in our lives. And I

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thought you and I could each start
by sharing one of those for each of

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us so that our listeners can get
present to maybe something for their own life.

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And so I'll go first. I
will. I've shared this before,

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just and other other listeners have heard
this before, just in case they haven't.

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And one conversation that made an enormous
difference in my life happened when I

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was nineteen years old and I was
living and working in a small office in

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Portland, Oregon for a man that
I absolutely adored working with, and I

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was his administrative assistant. And I
had been there for a year and a

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half when literally one day, on
the way out the door to go to

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lunch, he opened the door wide
and was walking through it and over his

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shoulder, he says to me,
you got to get out of here.

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You got to go see the world, get an education. But before you

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go, do something or high your
replacement, he said, And that was

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just profound, justin I didn't know
that was coming at all. And so

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when he came back from lunch,
I was still sitting there trying to process

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did he fire me? And I
asked him myself, hold on, before

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you go back to your office,
did you just fire me? And he

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said, of course I did.
It would be a crime to keep you

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here. And the thing about that, Justin, is that it never occurred

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to me that I could go to
college and so here I am. Let's

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see a bachelor's, two masters,
and a pH d. Letter. I

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think I did that. It never
occurred to me that I could that I

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could, you know, work or
live live abroad. And I've lived in

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Spain, in Brazil and presented in
most of the continents. So still working

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on that that bit about doing something
with myself, of course that's ever evolving.

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But that man totally changed my life. He actually saved my life because

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he opened a vista for me that
I could not see for myself, and

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I walked through that door. That's
a wonderful story and really shows someone that

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cares. We care more about the
hear and now they care more about even

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the individual conversation. They care about
you. And that's a really large part

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of what the premises of the blog
to reference, the idea that we can

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see someone and we can take one
conversation and redirect where they're going in life.

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And he did exactly that, and
that's truly an act of love,

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it really is, and your blog
is called love in Leadership, which certainly

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exemplifies what we're getting through here,
which is again why I wanted to have

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you on the show and around the
holidays, no less right talk about an

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act of giving that has made a
difference in my life decades later, and

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by the way, he and I
still stay in touch. He's a dear

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friend. When I went through my
divorce a couple of years three years ago,

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he called me every single weekend for
six months to make sure I was

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okay. Amazing man, absolutely,
What about you justin what can you can

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you share with us a conversation that
has really made a difference in your life?

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Sure, there are many, of
course I could point to. Just

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I think with all of us and
all of your listeners, there's one particularly

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that comes to mind. It was
very meaningful to me personally. It was

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actually after I had done something that
I was deeply ashamed of. I had

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wronged some people around me emotionally left
some wounds there with people that were close

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with me and a mentor and friend
of mine, and he's one of those

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people that I've had many conversations with
that have helped to redirect my life.

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And you might have someone in your
life like that that you kind of come

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back to again and again because they
tend to give you those types of deep

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thoughts and perspectives, and this man
is one of those people for me.

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And we were speaking after all of
this had started to kind of go on,

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and he sat down with me and
he just started asking me some questions

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about my mindset, what I had
been thinking, what my perspective was,

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and long story short, when he
came to help me realize is that I

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didn't really understand love, and he
did that in a powerful way. I

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remember him particularly asking me what I
felt the reactions of people around me were

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going to to what I had done, and in the course of that conversation,

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I revealed to him what I expected
I would lose all of these relationships

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and people wouldn't want to speak with
me anymore. And he asked me why

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it is I thought that that would
happen, and I explained, well,

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basically without saying it these words at
this time. There's a little more perspective

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later on, but basically what I
explained to him is I felt that the

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relationships were all conditional, and that's
where he began to shift to my thinking

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and explain to me and help me
to accept that love is not necessarily conditional.

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And moreover, many of these people
unconditionally loved me himself one of those

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people, and all it did was
hurt. It hurt myself, it hurt

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other people these decisions that I had
made. But there was life after those

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things, and there was still relationship
after those things. That thought was such

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a marvelous thought to me, and
it took me a good while longer to

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really accept the full impact of that. But I'll say that that conversation really

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helped me to understand unconditional love and
help me to understand my misunderstandings about love.

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So I'll say that that has such
a profound impact on my life and

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how I viewed relationship that even now
this blog Love and Leadership dot org,

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it centers around that idea intimacy and
unconditional love and what that looks like in

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relationships, especially in business relationships.
Is that's kind of one of the focuses

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of the blog, but it carries
over into every aspect of life that is

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so beautiful. Justin and again exemplifies
why I wanted to have you on the

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show and share you with with my
listeners because of that beautiful spirit and heart

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of yours and the service that you
have really cultivated in your being over the

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course of your time on the planet, and in so doing, share with

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our listeners the opportunity to really deepen
how they connect and communicate and converse with

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other people so that it's not only
enriching of their lives, but also that

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of the person they're speaking with,
just like you demonstrated and what you just

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shared with us. So thank you
for that beautiful story. So on the

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other side here, I'm very very
curious. I know that I can't even

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imagine the numerous or the number of
conversations that you've had over the years,

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and certainly in the twelve years that
you spent as a preacher talking with people

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and helping them. But would you
share with us just one conversation that you've

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had with someone where you could really
see that the message that you were giving

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them sync into them, into their
bones and alter their being. So what

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was the nature of the message and
why did you think they needed to hear

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it? Obviously protect the person that
you're going to share, I know you

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will, but help us understand what
that looks like. Sure, no,

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obviously, As'm pretty sure those types
of conversations happened pretty regularly. Would meet

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people a lot of times for the
first time and serious life crisis moments,

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whether it was the death of a
loved one or some type of a terminal

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diagnosis, or it was some event
that they had done themselves, maybe some

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wrong they had committed and so now
they're trying to figure out where to go

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from this point. I mean,
all types of things. You have a

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lot of powerful conversations in that way, but I think that I would rather

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discuss one that was more recent because
it was in the business community, outside

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of preaching in those things, and
I think it illustrates that you don't have

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to be a preacher, you don't
have to be someone in the ministry or

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whatever to have these types of powerful
conversations. Just recently, there was a

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man I was speaking with. He's
become a friend, and he was just

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talking to me about his brother's destructive
actions, actions that were destructive to himself

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and to the rest of the family, things centering around addiction, And in

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the course of that conversation just started
asking questions about his brother's upbringing, the

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things that he went through as a
child, and it starts becoming clear that

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this man had serious issues from childhood
relating back to abandon that and that type

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of torn emotional bond and a child
leaves lasting stars, as you very well

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know. And all of a sudden, all of the things he was saying

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about his brother's action started to make
sense to me. They very much represent

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shame and the stealing of hopelessness and
helplessness, this lost feeling that then leads

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a person to feel like there's no
other way to go. They might as

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well do bad things. They might
as well steal from family, or go

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back to drug use, or disappear
for a little while. That is such

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a hopeless and helpless place to be. So what I proceeded to do was,

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leaning on some of the experiences that
I've had dealing with others and working

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through different types of traumas, started
to bring to the forefront how his brother

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may be feeling deep down even if
he can't verbalize it. Maybe he can't

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verbalize what shame really is, the
self hatred that's there, or maybe he

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can't explain what it's like to not
be trusted by anyone and not feel unconditionally

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loved by anyone. You know,
We're much more likely to behave well,

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so to speak, and to do
good for others when we feel that others

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love us, when we feel that
there's a place for us in the world.

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And when you don't have those things, everything seems hopeless and it just

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doesn't seem like a point to living
anymore. And it's not to say that

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we don't have to deal with the
physical fallout of actions and to try to

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navigate through the difficulties of individual circumstances, but I think that it's important when

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we're dealing with someone in that type
of situation that we still understand where they

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may be coming from emotionally, why
they're doing what they're doing, and try

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to strike at the root of the
issue. So in the course of the

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conversation I recommended a couple of books
to him. One of those books was

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Trust First by Bruce Deal, a
recent relief. It's very powerful, and

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going through this conversation, what I
saw in the individual I was speaking with

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was a total of thinking around why
his brother may be behaving in this way,

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And that's a powerful thing to witness. And I don't know what's going

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to happen out of all of that
situation yet, but I do know that

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the beginning of change is going to
come from love and having some type of

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impact in this man's life I was
speaking with. Is enough to walk away

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from the conversation that they're like,
Wow, that was supposed to just be

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a little business meeting and what it
ended up being with something much more powerful

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than that and lasting than that.
How beautiful? Justin just a gift And

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I want to comment on a couple
of things, but let's grab our first

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break. I'm your host, Alis
Cortez. We've been the yere with Justin

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McCorkle, who's the director of business
development at Tuaris Cyber. Previously, who

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worked in the ministry, where he
spent twelve years as a preacher, guiding

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church growth and delivering church leadership seminars
around the United States and in Central America.

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He has also worked in the political
arena as a speechwriter, campaign coordinator,

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and state delegate for various officials and
candidates at the state and national levels.

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Today he joined us from Dallas,
Texas. We've been talking a bit

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about the art of conversing in a
meaningful way. After the break, will

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continue the conversation. Stay with us. We'll be right back. Alise Cortes

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is a speaker and engagement and development
catalyst. She designs and delivers professional development,

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leadership and engagement workshops and can bring
her expertise to your organization. She

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will help ignite meaningful development within your
workforce that will increase employee engagement, performance

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00:16:42.120 --> 00:16:47.320
and retention. To learn more or
to invite Elise to speak to your organization,

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00:16:47.519 --> 00:16:52.600
please visit her at www dot Elise
Coortes dot com. She would welcome

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00:16:52.639 --> 00:17:03.799
the opportunity to help get your employees
working on purpose. This is working on

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00:17:03.879 --> 00:17:07.640
Purpose with Elise Cortes. To reach
our program today, send an email to

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a lease Alise at aliscortes dot com. Now back to working on purpose.

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Thanks for staying with us, and
welcome back to working on purpose. If

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you're just tuning in. My guest
is Justin mccarchole. He is the director

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of business Development at Tuaris Cyber.
He has also worked in the ministry,

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where he spent twelve years as a
preacher, guiding church growth and delivering church

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leadership seminars around the United States and
in Central America. I'm your host at

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Las Cortes, So just one comment
about that beautiful story that you shared with

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us before we go on here to
the conversation Justin is what I really heard.

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For that conversation to be as effective
as it was is presence. You

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had to be present to be able
to catch that what he was sharing with

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you in order to be able to
serve up what you did. Yeah.

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Absolutely, I mean there's something about
looking to the next thing that distracts you

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from what you're doing. I've done
that a lot myself, I think all

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of us have. And in that
conversation, it may have been more prudent

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business wise, or it may have
stuck with the agenda more to not get

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dragged off into some tangent about some
family things that were going on, But

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it doesn't actually change anything. It
doesn't help anybody in the long term.

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So instead hearing what's going on in
someone's life and then instead engaging with that,

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sometimes that's just the better use of
time. I mean, at the

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end of the day, we have
one life and we're going to spend that

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one life and it's over with.
We're not walking under the sun anymore.

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So what do you want to spend
your time doing? And that doesn't just

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have to be a big conversation about
priorities of life in general. A lot

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of times it just comes down to
a momentary decision, what do I want

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to do with my life in this
moment, in this conversation, and hear

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what's being said and what people are
actually dealing with, because a lot of

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times it's not the most important thing
that we talk talk about what's pressing business

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wise. Sometimes the most important thing
is what's pressing life wise. Absolutely,

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and I so much of what I'm
up to in the world, as you

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know, is helping people to really
be awakened to a deeper level of meaning,

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passion, inspiration, and purpose.
And that does take really being in

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that space, and which is why
I wanted to have this conversation with you

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justin because you know, to be
able to help our listeners develop the acumen

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and the ability and the muscle to
have these kind of conversations is incredibly meaningful.

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And when we look at the world, that is what's missing for so

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many people is connection. Part of
what is undergriding the depression and anxiety and

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drug use, et cetera, is
that people don't feel connected. So all

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the more that I wanted to have
you on the air talking about it because

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I think you are and I know
you're gonna blush at this, but you

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are uniquely qualified to talk about this
just because of who you are as a

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human being and the work that you've
gotten to do as a preacher. Well,

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well, I may be uniquely qualified
in some negative ways as well.

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I mean, the truth is that
even in leadership roles, even in preaching,

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for most of my time on the
planet, I have not been a

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connected person. And it's not that
I wasn't connecting to help others. It's

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that I wasn't allowing them to truly
connect with me. And there's a lot

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written on my blog about that.
You know, I also come from some

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childhood trauma and some abandonment issues and
things of that nature, and have spent

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most of my life on the planet
not understanding the impact of those things on

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myself. And just like I mentioned
the conversation with my mentor earlier, that

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helped to change my thinking and redirect
my focus. You know, broken people

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oftentimes want to help other broken people, and that's where I would fit into

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that category. I wanted to do
good for others. I wanted to help

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other people, but I didn't really
understand my own brokenness and why it is

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that I felt those kinships and connections, and moreover, I didn't understand that

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I was not providing the same intimate
see into my life to others that I

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was seeing in other people and receiving
from other people. And that what that

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speaks to for me, justin is
just that the beauty and grace of your

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willingness to step into growth right and
to recognize where you've been and to work

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on trying to develop from that place
is what I think life is all about.

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And you have something interesting along those
lines on your blog that I thought

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was interesting in that same post that
I'd love for you to share on You

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say, lately, it has become
obvious to me that many people have not

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spent much time in the space of
radical, challenging growth. So I'm wondering,

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you know, just because I can
see that in you you have gone

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through that and will continue to do
so, I know, but what are

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your observations on this and how did
you arrive at that deduction? Well,

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first of all, I would just
say that pride is a mask and I

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myself have borne that mask quite a
bit, so then having painfully removed it,

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it's often easy to spot on other
people for me in engaging in so

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many conversations that I do. Of
course, my work now enables me to

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meet a lot of people, and
that's always exciting. You're one of those

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people, and I really appreciate the
opportunities that I have to get to know

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so many different types of people.
But as those things happen, I often

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am in inside myself kind of gauging
a person's willingness to be vulnerable, and

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I think that that's often indicative of
how much time they've spent in that radical,

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challenging growth space that you're referring to. So people come into conversations a

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lot of times and you can almost
see the bravado, the ego, and

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the pride that's there behind what they're
saying. Everybody wants to speak about,

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even if in a very subtle way, how great we are. And I

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guess I'm kind of past that enough
to the point now to where what it

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seems like to me is a mask
and it's guarding something, it's guarding intimacy.

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But that's also where these conversations come
into play, and we can give

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the opportunity for other people to take
that mask off, and a lot of

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times it comes along with us speaking
about our worst moments rather than our best

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moments. Yes, I wanted to
talk about that, and I completely agree,

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and that was so beautifully narrated and
brought to the surface for us,

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justin thank you for that. One
of the things that you also say is

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that you've noticed, and certainly in
your own life too, that sometimes the

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hardest times to speak to someone is
when they might be not having a they

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might be in a very difficult time
that we tend to avoid that, like

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when somebody, for example, I
see it all the time, when somebody

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has lost a loved one. There's
usually the cursory, oh, I'm so

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sorry for your loss, instead of
really engaging in and being in the moment

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with that person to maybe hear tell
me about David or you know the person's

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name, bring the person's name out
there and enter into that beautiful, delicate,

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vulnerable space with them. Will you
say more about that, this whole

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notion of maybe our reticence not to
engage in conversations with people when they are

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dealing with some of the most difficult
things. Yeah, there's an obvious temptation

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in most of us to avoid difficulty, and that includes difficulty in conversations.

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So someone says something about having just
lost a spouse or they've just been diagnosed

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with some terrible disease, and what
we I think tend to want to do.

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Speak for myself, I mean a
lot of times there's this urge to,

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oh, let's redirect the conversation,
let's change something else. But that's

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probably the best time to have meaningful
conversation. So one view says that we

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have about seventy two hours to reset
after crisis. That is to say that

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there's this window of moment where we
can totally change our lives and we can

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have everything flipped for us. But
it's going to take different direction, it's

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going to take a whole new perspective. But crisis is something that just has

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up ended us. With that in
mind, when we are conversation with someone,

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even if you're outside of the seventy
to our window, but you know

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that they're going through some major life
crisis, even if they're downplaying its impact.

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Instead of avoiding that, it may
be best to engage it. Of

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course, not pushing, not wanting
to put someone into a conversation they don't

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want to be in. However,
if we know these things about them,

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especially if they brought it up,
there's probably a desire within them to discuss

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it or to have some type of
interaction around the topic. So instead of

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running away from it, I think
that we ought to embrace the moment and

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see it for what it is.
Even if it's terrible, it's also beautiful,

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and it's more beautiful for someone that's
not in the crisis, right.

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I mean, you've been through crisis. I have as well, and in

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that moment, it is the most
awful feeling. There is a fear,

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there is all types of adrenaline,
so much going on within us that is

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just awful. However, someone standing
outside of us can see something that we

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can't see. In things that I've
gone through, there have been people outside

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of me that have looked at me
and told me that you're going to be

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better because of this. This is
going to change you for the better.

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And it is not something that is
easy to hear, and you certainly don't

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accept it at the moment because you
feel like you're never going to get up

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from whatever has just knocked you down. But it's oftentimes true and others can

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see that better and we may be
one of those other people to step back

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and to look at someone's situation and
to just get perspective and meaningful conversation to

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them that will help them to become
the person that they can become out of

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these things, which, of course, as you know, Justin, is

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exactly why I get up every single
morning, is wanting to have the ability

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to make an impact on others by
transforming them, by helping them transform into

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something more or bigger, or more
enriched than they were before. So I'm

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hanging on every word justin. Thank
you. So one other thing that you

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said in that blog post thought was
so enticing, and you've said a lot

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in a short amount of time,
by the way. So one of the

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other things that you say is that
in making a difference to someone's life in

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a single conversation does require a certain
mindset. You say, so help us

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get present to that, is it? How would you describe maybe a more

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ideal or effective mindset? Sure,
I mean, obviously this is probably not

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a complete list of things that go
along with that. I'm sure that you

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and your audience can think of other
things that would be relevant to that conversation.

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But start out with a negative.
What we don't want to be is

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a know it all and having a
know at all mindset. This I know

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better for you, I know better
for your life than you know. All

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those types of things are major barriers
to actually helping someone, But rather it

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requires a mindset of love and respect, concern, compassion, and passion to

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help other people. If we enter
into a conversation with those things, it's

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going to be very different. So
what I mean, particularly by that the

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mindset of love is the selflessness that
I'm not here in this moment from me.

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I'm not here to talk about me, although that may help, and

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we can come back to that if
you want to in a little while,

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but I'm not here for my benefit. I'm here for someone else that's benefit,

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and this person that's in front of
me respect. They deserve respect no

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matter who they are, no matter
what they've done, no matter where they

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are in life. It doesn't matter
if you're talking to someone that has burned

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every bridge they've ever crossed. This
person deserves respect because they're a human being

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and their subjective experience has shaped them. I tend to see the best in

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people. I think that most people
have good within them, even if it's

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very deep down, and usually it's
very deep down because of trauma, because

404
00:28:42.960 --> 00:28:48.079
of things inflicted upon them. So
everyone deserves respect, and we have to

405
00:28:48.079 --> 00:28:51.960
start with respect or we're certainly not
going to receive any back, and then

406
00:28:52.039 --> 00:28:56.160
concern wanting to see them evolve to
become better than they are and we all

407
00:28:56.200 --> 00:28:59.759
can be better. So it's not
a way of looking down our nose at

408
00:28:59.759 --> 00:29:00.839
some point one to say that.
I mean, people can look at me,

409
00:29:00.920 --> 00:29:04.480
and I hope they do say this
person can be better, and I

410
00:29:04.559 --> 00:29:08.599
want to be. So if we
approach others with the same mindset that they

411
00:29:08.599 --> 00:29:12.359
can be better than they are right
now, that's concerned, and then compassion

412
00:29:12.400 --> 00:29:18.680
for their circumstance, and then having
a real desire to help to be involved

413
00:29:18.920 --> 00:29:22.640
with them and to help them grow
from this. And maybe they don't want

414
00:29:22.680 --> 00:29:25.880
us there, and that's okay as
well. It's that's part of respect.

415
00:29:26.400 --> 00:29:29.079
We might not be the person for
them in that situation, and maybe they're

416
00:29:29.079 --> 00:29:32.480
not ready to enter into those conversations
and that's all fine as well. But

417
00:29:32.599 --> 00:29:36.160
having the mindset with all of those
aspects to it, I think will help

418
00:29:36.240 --> 00:29:40.839
us to find these kind of conversations
where we're able to change lives. You

419
00:29:40.920 --> 00:29:44.640
gave us so much that in that
justin just now, and that giving us

420
00:29:44.680 --> 00:29:48.680
access to be able to get present
to just we're how it is that we

421
00:29:48.720 --> 00:29:53.559
can create a space in which to
converse meaningfully with someone that was that was

422
00:29:53.599 --> 00:29:56.920
incredibly useful. Thank you, and
let's go ahead and grab our last our

423
00:29:57.000 --> 00:30:02.079
last break here before we go into
segment. I'm your host, Elise Cortes.

424
00:30:02.119 --> 00:30:03.599
We've got on the air with Justin
mccorkorl who is the director of business

425
00:30:03.640 --> 00:30:07.200
development for Tuares Cyber. Previously,
he worked in the ministry, where he

426
00:30:07.240 --> 00:30:11.400
spent twelve years as a preacher,
guiding church growth and delivering church leadership seminars

427
00:30:11.440 --> 00:30:15.759
around the United States and in Central
America. He also worked in the political

428
00:30:15.799 --> 00:30:18.720
arena as a speech writer, campaign
coordinator, and state delegate for various officials

429
00:30:18.720 --> 00:30:22.000
and candidates at the state and national
levels. He joined it today from Dallas,

430
00:30:22.079 --> 00:30:26.200
Texas. After the RAC will continued
conversation. Stay with us, We'll

431
00:30:26.200 --> 00:30:49.920
be right back. Alice Cortez is
a speaker and engagement and development catalyst.

432
00:30:51.119 --> 00:30:56.519
She designs and delivers professional development,
leadership and engagement workshops and can bring her

433
00:30:56.559 --> 00:31:00.680
expertise to your organization. She will
help ignite meaningful development within your workforce that

434
00:31:00.720 --> 00:31:06.680
will increase employee engagement, performance and
retention. To learn more or to invite

435
00:31:06.720 --> 00:31:11.400
Elise to speak to your organization,
please visit her at www dot Elisecortes dot

436
00:31:11.440 --> 00:31:17.400
com. She would welcome the opportunity
to help get your employees working on purpose.

437
00:31:22.680 --> 00:31:27.680
This is working on Purpose with Elise
Cortes. To reach our program today,

438
00:31:27.920 --> 00:31:34.720
send an email to a lease Alise
at Aleasecortes dot com. Now back

439
00:31:34.799 --> 00:31:41.640
to working on purpose. Thanks Christine
Lincus, and welcome back to working on

440
00:31:41.680 --> 00:31:44.359
purpose. If you're just tuning in, my guest is Justin mcorcole, who

441
00:31:44.400 --> 00:31:48.160
is the director of business development for
tuaras Cyber. He's also the author of

442
00:31:48.200 --> 00:31:51.759
a blog called Love in Leadership.
It's Love in Leadership dot org. I'm

443
00:31:51.799 --> 00:31:55.839
your host Elise Cortes. So Justin, one of the things that I also

444
00:31:55.920 --> 00:31:57.680
wanted to service, which you started
to speak to there, or you did

445
00:31:57.680 --> 00:32:01.640
actually speak to, but I wanted
to up more deeply, is you say

446
00:32:01.720 --> 00:32:07.400
that we need to take caution when
our heart is our own heart isn't right

447
00:32:07.440 --> 00:32:09.799
when we because we can actually cause
damage and our intention to help someone else

448
00:32:09.839 --> 00:32:14.640
in a conversation. So I think
that's really really important. In fact,

449
00:32:14.640 --> 00:32:20.359
in the years that I've spent running
crucial conversations workshops for companies and still do

450
00:32:20.480 --> 00:32:23.640
somewhat today, that whole part about
the heart getting very clear about your intention

451
00:32:23.799 --> 00:32:29.160
is really important. Can you say
more about that? Yeah? Sure,

452
00:32:29.559 --> 00:32:34.079
it's true in every field, in
every area of life and every relationship that

453
00:32:34.319 --> 00:32:37.680
if we aren't approaching it with the
right intention, with a selfless intention to

454
00:32:37.680 --> 00:32:40.440
help someone else, it's probably not
going to turn out to their benefit or

455
00:32:40.519 --> 00:32:45.799
hours. Now, sometimes I think
that we try to deny that to ourselves.

456
00:32:45.839 --> 00:32:49.400
We know maybe deep down that we're
not doing this for the right reasons.

457
00:32:49.400 --> 00:32:51.920
We're not saying these things for the
right reasons, but we kind of

458
00:32:51.920 --> 00:32:53.759
press through because we think, hey, it all is good in the end,

459
00:32:53.920 --> 00:32:58.799
but it really isn't because we're not
going to focus on the things we

460
00:32:58.839 --> 00:33:01.960
should focus on, say what we
should say, whether that's an easy thing

461
00:33:02.000 --> 00:33:06.400
to say or a hard thing to
say, if our purpose and intent isn't

462
00:33:06.440 --> 00:33:10.920
correct in the conversation. So however, we're approaching a person that's in front

463
00:33:10.960 --> 00:33:15.799
of us, we have to be
looking at them for who they are and

464
00:33:15.839 --> 00:33:19.599
where they are, and recognizing ourselves
who we are and where we are and

465
00:33:19.640 --> 00:33:23.000
what our biases are. Even having
a bias doesn't necessarily mean that we can't

466
00:33:23.000 --> 00:33:27.640
do that. But we can't be
selfless and help someone, but we have

467
00:33:27.680 --> 00:33:30.480
to recognize that it's there. And
if I'm talking with someone and the story

468
00:33:30.480 --> 00:33:34.680
that they're telling me has an impact
on my life, and them choosing a

469
00:33:34.759 --> 00:33:38.920
particular path is going to affect my
life, I may be tempted to push

470
00:33:39.039 --> 00:33:44.839
them toward doing what is expedient for
me personally, and that's not what we're

471
00:33:44.839 --> 00:33:47.920
talking about and having these types of
meaningful conversations and changing someone's life in one

472
00:33:47.920 --> 00:33:52.759
conversation, because it's very likely the
unit that's down the road they're going to

473
00:33:52.759 --> 00:33:57.400
come to understand what your true intent
was and it's going to turn bad.

474
00:33:57.799 --> 00:34:01.200
So instead would say that it's better
for us to walk away from those conversations.

475
00:34:01.400 --> 00:34:06.279
Sometimes there are conversations that could be
meaningful, could be powerful, that

476
00:34:06.279 --> 00:34:08.920
we just shouldn't be a part of. And that's the same reason. Right

477
00:34:08.960 --> 00:34:14.000
when someone's being selected for jury,
they want to know what type of bias

478
00:34:14.039 --> 00:34:17.360
is there in that person? Do
they know the defendant and questions around that

479
00:34:17.400 --> 00:34:22.119
topic affect the choice of who's going
to be in that jury, and maybe

480
00:34:22.119 --> 00:34:27.800
sometimes we're not the person to have
a conversation. Mm hmm, agreed.

481
00:34:28.559 --> 00:34:31.199
And as you were talking about that, Justin, I got present to something

482
00:34:31.599 --> 00:34:36.639
for myself and for me, one
of the most glorious things someone can say

483
00:34:36.679 --> 00:34:39.639
to me as we're having a conversation
is I've never heard myself say that before.

484
00:34:39.960 --> 00:34:43.960
In other words, I'm the first
person to catch something that they just

485
00:34:44.000 --> 00:34:45.400
got for themselves. To me,
that is one of the greatest gifts and

486
00:34:45.440 --> 00:34:51.159
indications that we're having a meaningful conversation
that may actually alter the course of their

487
00:34:51.199 --> 00:34:57.039
lives. And I used to always
say Justin that when I'm talking with people,

488
00:34:57.079 --> 00:34:58.840
Look, if you're not going to
share your soul with me, don't

489
00:34:58.840 --> 00:35:02.559
waste my time, which isn't for
everyone, right, But you do talk

490
00:35:02.599 --> 00:35:08.719
about the essentialness of openness and intimacy
and having these life changing conversations. And

491
00:35:08.760 --> 00:35:14.920
I think the word intimacy is often
misunderstood. Will you give us a bit

492
00:35:14.960 --> 00:35:20.079
deeper access to what you mean by
openness and intimacy? Sure? Why should

493
00:35:20.119 --> 00:35:24.239
anyone trust me if I won't trust
them? There is an elitism that comes

494
00:35:24.239 --> 00:35:31.440
along in leadership roles A lot of
times that we feel this maternal or paternal

495
00:35:31.480 --> 00:35:37.679
instinct for the people that we're dealing
with. But that type of thinking is

496
00:35:37.800 --> 00:35:42.639
very self damaging. I've definitely been
involved in this, I've had these types

497
00:35:42.679 --> 00:35:45.559
of mindsets, So I want you
to know I'm speaking from real personal experience

498
00:35:45.599 --> 00:35:50.400
here, where what i want is
for the person I'm speaking with to truly

499
00:35:50.480 --> 00:35:52.679
open up, to be totally vulnerable, totally intimate, and I'm going to

500
00:35:52.719 --> 00:35:58.239
do my best to help them based
on what they provide in that conversation around

501
00:35:58.280 --> 00:36:02.239
those things. However, keeping myself
guarded and distant from them is done to

502
00:36:02.239 --> 00:36:06.639
protect myself because, after all,
I'm in a role of influence. You

503
00:36:06.679 --> 00:36:08.880
know, I'm some type of leader, whether it's a church leader, a

504
00:36:08.960 --> 00:36:13.559
counselor, or whatever. And of
course counselors maybe a little different there,

505
00:36:13.559 --> 00:36:17.639
and we could have more conversation around
that another time, But there's a type

506
00:36:17.639 --> 00:36:22.559
of thinking that says, well,
I can't be equally as vulnerable as person.

507
00:36:22.079 --> 00:36:25.079
And I went a long time feeling
that way, because after all,

508
00:36:25.119 --> 00:36:29.039
it would diminish my influence that people
knew the struggles that I was having,

509
00:36:29.320 --> 00:36:31.400
it would be something that closed them
off for me. Maybe they wouldn't come

510
00:36:31.440 --> 00:36:34.880
to me for help, they wouldn't
open up to me if they knew that

511
00:36:35.079 --> 00:36:37.519
I'm also a real person and I'm
also going through things and struggling with things,

512
00:36:37.519 --> 00:36:42.159
and I also have problems in my
marriage, and I also have struggles

513
00:36:42.159 --> 00:36:46.320
with my family members and so forth
and so on. And that is so

514
00:36:46.599 --> 00:36:53.199
self damaging because not only do I
need community, all of us we need

515
00:36:53.239 --> 00:36:58.000
community, and we need to feel
that we can share and we should be

516
00:36:58.039 --> 00:37:00.280
open. Not only do I need
that, but really I'm at the point

517
00:37:00.320 --> 00:37:06.239
to where I think that our fellow
conversationalists, this partner in life, this

518
00:37:06.400 --> 00:37:12.000
friend that we're talking to, they
also need that us being willing to share

519
00:37:12.039 --> 00:37:15.840
ourselves with them is just another sign
of great mutual respect. That's not to

520
00:37:15.880 --> 00:37:20.320
say that it doesn't come with some
risk. It certainly does. But I

521
00:37:20.320 --> 00:37:25.719
think that it behooves us to consider
that we are the same as this person.

522
00:37:27.280 --> 00:37:29.719
We are equal to this person,
no matter what our level is.

523
00:37:29.760 --> 00:37:32.880
It doesn't matter if there are subordinate
whatever else. There is a role of

524
00:37:34.000 --> 00:37:37.360
business that is not the same as
being a human being, and we are

525
00:37:37.440 --> 00:37:43.119
all human beings trying to make it
through life. I don't mean to say

526
00:37:43.119 --> 00:37:45.880
that we should be foolish about the
conversations that we have. I'm just saying

527
00:37:45.880 --> 00:37:50.880
that if we are wanting someone to
open up to us, certainly we should

528
00:37:50.960 --> 00:37:55.360
consider opening up to an equal extent
with them. I completely agree. And

529
00:37:55.400 --> 00:37:59.920
I think that takes us to the
next thing that I wanted to talk about,

530
00:37:59.880 --> 00:38:02.000
which I think will deepen just what
you said here, and that is

531
00:38:02.039 --> 00:38:07.000
this idea of alignment that you talk
about. And so there's a statement that

532
00:38:07.079 --> 00:38:09.199
you have in this blog post that
I want to read for our listeners.

533
00:38:09.639 --> 00:38:13.639
You say, if you can come
to see another person in their pain,

534
00:38:13.960 --> 00:38:16.400
joy, confusion, or any other
state of being as they are, and

535
00:38:16.440 --> 00:38:21.639
they can do the same, you've
aligned yourselves in such a way that true,

536
00:38:21.719 --> 00:38:25.400
meaningful communication can take place. Wow. I mean that is extraordinary.

537
00:38:25.480 --> 00:38:30.239
That to me, when you align
on that level, that's like the rest

538
00:38:30.239 --> 00:38:35.760
of the world stops around you.
Yeah. Absolutely. It is a crowded

539
00:38:35.800 --> 00:38:38.480
place sitting in a coffee shop and
suddenly no one else is there. So

540
00:38:38.559 --> 00:38:43.760
what matters is the person writing front
of you and they feel the same,

541
00:38:44.079 --> 00:38:51.400
and we're involved in a very intimate
dance that will never be forgotten, and

542
00:38:51.440 --> 00:38:55.519
that's a powerful moment of life,
and really that's maybe the substance of life.

543
00:38:55.679 --> 00:39:00.559
And to think that we can do
that at a first men, just

544
00:39:00.599 --> 00:39:04.800
in one conversation is really beautiful.
And if there's a chance of doing that,

545
00:39:04.880 --> 00:39:07.960
then we have to be trying to
take that opportunity well. And that's

546
00:39:08.000 --> 00:39:14.440
exactly what together I hope we're encouraging
our listeners to do. That's exactly why

547
00:39:14.480 --> 00:39:16.719
I wanted to have you on the
show, is to give people access to

548
00:39:17.280 --> 00:39:21.679
this beautiful place that I know you
and I've been able to enjoy together,

549
00:39:22.119 --> 00:39:27.480
to come in an alignment and experience
what it really means to be completely present

550
00:39:27.559 --> 00:39:31.079
in somebody else's life. They are
completely seen and understood and heard, and

551
00:39:31.079 --> 00:39:35.480
so were you at the same time, and something in you gets altered in

552
00:39:35.519 --> 00:39:38.000
the course of that conversation. As
you say, I think that's pretty much

553
00:39:38.000 --> 00:39:45.519
as good as it gets. Absolutely
so. This other thing that you talk

554
00:39:45.559 --> 00:39:49.760
about here that I think is important
to the same thing. And as I

555
00:39:49.800 --> 00:39:52.920
say, this blog that you've written
is very tight and there's so much in

556
00:39:52.960 --> 00:39:57.960
it to unpack, like we're doing
today. But you do say that making

557
00:39:58.000 --> 00:40:00.800
this kind of a difference in someone's
life when you were really do move the

558
00:40:00.920 --> 00:40:04.800
needle in their world. It does
require an element of risk, and I

559
00:40:04.880 --> 00:40:07.840
think that's important for us to talk
about so help us get present and ready

560
00:40:08.119 --> 00:40:14.679
to face this risk. How can
we position ourselves to best embolden or handle

561
00:40:15.400 --> 00:40:20.719
that risk? Well, not put
it this way, what is the worst

562
00:40:20.719 --> 00:40:25.920
thing you've ever done in your life? That identification is you can kind of

563
00:40:25.960 --> 00:40:30.880
sort through your mind and think of
the worst thing you've ever done. How

564
00:40:30.920 --> 00:40:35.519
willing are you to share that information
with someone else? How willing are you

565
00:40:35.599 --> 00:40:39.440
to share it in a conversation with
someone that having that knowledge may just be

566
00:40:39.559 --> 00:40:45.159
the thing that opens up this great
door of intimacy and allows the conversation to

567
00:40:45.199 --> 00:40:50.320
go so much deeper than it otherwise
could have. But you also know that

568
00:40:50.400 --> 00:40:55.000
if you share that information that there's
risk. They could take that information and

569
00:40:55.079 --> 00:40:59.440
use it to hurt you later on. They could harm you or other people

570
00:40:59.480 --> 00:41:04.760
with it. They could to tear
down business relationships, or they could take

571
00:41:04.800 --> 00:41:09.360
it to someone else and someone that's
not so forgiving and merciful. Having the

572
00:41:09.599 --> 00:41:17.239
willingness to risk it all is really
I think important to this concept. You

573
00:41:17.280 --> 00:41:20.960
know we want to be present,
we want to be there, and we're

574
00:41:20.960 --> 00:41:24.239
doing this for someone else. But
sometimes what they need is to know that

575
00:41:24.559 --> 00:41:29.639
whatever they're dealing with, you've been
through something similar, or if you haven't,

576
00:41:29.800 --> 00:41:34.440
you've been through something painful that allows
them to connect with you. And

577
00:41:35.000 --> 00:41:37.679
maybe in the course of this conversation, you have other thoughts about, well,

578
00:41:37.679 --> 00:41:40.800
if I open up about this,
it's going to potentially cause these things

579
00:41:40.800 --> 00:41:45.599
to happen. These dominant effects I
had that I was in a conversation just

580
00:41:45.679 --> 00:41:49.639
a couple of months back with a
man that's going through a difficult situation,

581
00:41:49.840 --> 00:41:52.760
and the course of that conversation,
some things were mentioned about his relationship with

582
00:41:52.880 --> 00:41:57.480
his wife and different things that were
going on in their life, and this

583
00:41:57.559 --> 00:42:00.039
all effective business and all these types
of things. The course of that conversation,

584
00:42:00.159 --> 00:42:04.280
what I came to realize is that
this person's being intimate with me,

585
00:42:04.280 --> 00:42:07.119
They're being open with me, and
to really strike it the heart of maybe

586
00:42:07.119 --> 00:42:10.960
what needs to be dealt with,
I need to share personal things that are

587
00:42:12.000 --> 00:42:15.239
going to show that I know some
of the pain that's being dealt with there.

588
00:42:15.559 --> 00:42:19.159
And so then opening up to do
that would open me up in this

589
00:42:19.239 --> 00:42:23.719
relationship because we have other business connections
with one another, and that information could

590
00:42:23.760 --> 00:42:28.079
be spread and who knows what impact
it would have down the line. But

591
00:42:28.719 --> 00:42:31.599
that's a risk that I was willing
to take, and I encourage others to

592
00:42:31.639 --> 00:42:36.719
take, because even if it does
go that way, even if they use

593
00:42:36.760 --> 00:42:39.440
some information they gained from us something
that we're going through in life, or

594
00:42:39.440 --> 00:42:43.440
we have gone through, or some
mistake that we've made, or some loss

595
00:42:43.440 --> 00:42:47.159
that we've had, if they share
that in such a way that it could

596
00:42:47.159 --> 00:42:51.320
affect something else, what I think
we'll find is that people tend to be

597
00:42:51.360 --> 00:42:54.039
more merciful than we give them credit
for, and those that aren't, maybe

598
00:42:54.079 --> 00:43:00.039
we didn't need them in our lives
to begin with. It's expecting the risk

599
00:43:00.159 --> 00:43:05.320
for what it is, but accepting
the positive risk. What could come out

600
00:43:05.360 --> 00:43:09.199
of that is a deeper conversation and
a deeper connection with a person that could

601
00:43:09.519 --> 00:43:15.199
end up changing this person's life.
We're holding that in may very well prohibit

602
00:43:15.239 --> 00:43:20.559
that from happening. What I got
present to as you were sharing that Justin

603
00:43:20.719 --> 00:43:22.639
is just this whole notion that all
of us have heard before is that you

604
00:43:22.760 --> 00:43:25.880
get what you put into life,
we get out of life what you put

605
00:43:25.880 --> 00:43:31.400
into it right. So if you're
willing to make that psychological emotional investment in

606
00:43:31.519 --> 00:43:37.920
a conversation like that, the reward, the return on your investment is dynamic.

607
00:43:38.000 --> 00:43:44.239
It's terrific. And I do think
that being willing to risk ourselves emotionally

608
00:43:45.280 --> 00:43:50.639
and spiritually certainly is really really important, and I want to surface that now

609
00:43:50.679 --> 00:43:54.360
on specifically in the workspace you've been
talking about. These conversations have been over

610
00:43:54.559 --> 00:43:59.039
largely business conversations, which I think
is important for our listeners to understand.

611
00:43:59.079 --> 00:44:02.559
These can do this all over our
life and certainly at work and in business

612
00:44:02.559 --> 00:44:07.800
too. But let's talk about what
we tend to both see in that,

613
00:44:08.719 --> 00:44:13.599
especially in leadership. There's a lot
of guarding in leadership people. I do

614
00:44:13.639 --> 00:44:16.320
a lot of coaching with men and
women, and they often tell me that

615
00:44:16.320 --> 00:44:22.079
they feel like they should really guard
who they are. What is your perspective,

616
00:44:22.239 --> 00:44:25.840
what would you what would you surface
for our listeners in regard to people

617
00:44:25.960 --> 00:44:32.079
being truly authentic in who they are
as leaders? Well, my experience is

618
00:44:32.079 --> 00:44:37.800
just the fact opposite of that.
So I can reference several different business relationships

619
00:44:38.320 --> 00:44:45.039
with subordinates or with partners, business
partners that work for the companies that I

620
00:44:45.039 --> 00:44:50.559
have to interact with. I can
tell you that people in these relationships we

621
00:44:50.639 --> 00:44:53.599
tend to view is kind of distant
from us. We interact with them with

622
00:44:53.760 --> 00:44:57.800
just what we need and then we
kind of move on. But I suggest

623
00:44:57.800 --> 00:45:00.679
that there's a lot more potential there. And I have, for instance,

624
00:45:00.719 --> 00:45:07.199
a business partner that has been going
through some real struggles with life, and

625
00:45:07.280 --> 00:45:09.239
I found myself picking up the phone
and give them a call after hours to

626
00:45:09.320 --> 00:45:13.159
check on and see how things are
going. And we end up having a

627
00:45:13.199 --> 00:45:17.559
conversation about things far beyond the scope
of our work. And that knowledge came

628
00:45:17.559 --> 00:45:22.440
about because of both of our willingness
to be opened during the few minutes before

629
00:45:22.440 --> 00:45:27.320
a business meeting starts or something where
we're actually kind of connecting and learning each

630
00:45:27.320 --> 00:45:30.039
other's life. And now I would
say that we're after ours friends, not

631
00:45:30.119 --> 00:45:36.119
that we talk all the time,
but that this person knows that if they

632
00:45:36.199 --> 00:45:37.599
need to talk to me after hours
or something outside of work, we can

633
00:45:37.639 --> 00:45:43.880
do that, and vice versa.
And then in a situation with someone who

634
00:45:44.159 --> 00:45:47.480
works for me, I know some
of the things going on in their life.

635
00:45:47.840 --> 00:45:52.440
Having conversation about those things is not
inappropriate in my mindset. To the

636
00:45:52.440 --> 00:45:55.679
workplace because we're playing an infinite game
here. We're not to use some of

637
00:45:57.079 --> 00:46:00.320
Simon Sinek's language there, you know, we're not just out to try to

638
00:46:00.360 --> 00:46:04.840
have the best quarter or the best
year financially. We're out to try to

639
00:46:04.840 --> 00:46:07.800
be involved in each other's lives and
in our clients lives, to try to

640
00:46:07.840 --> 00:46:12.840
help to do something bigger than just
work. So these people that come to

641
00:46:12.920 --> 00:46:16.360
work, they have real lives,
they have real emotions, real pain,

642
00:46:16.960 --> 00:46:21.360
They're people just like we are.
Again, we're each humans, so we're

643
00:46:21.400 --> 00:46:23.719
equal in that sense. We're all
created in the image of God, and

644
00:46:23.920 --> 00:46:30.000
that should give us the motivation to
connect. And that doesn't mean that we're

645
00:46:30.000 --> 00:46:32.400
not going to have to have some
awkward conversations sometimes and we're going to have

646
00:46:32.440 --> 00:46:36.960
to tell people to step up in
this area, or we're going to have

647
00:46:37.039 --> 00:46:42.000
to reevaluate employment position for someone.
Those things happen that are part of life

648
00:46:42.039 --> 00:46:45.360
as well. But as long as
someone is in our sphere of influence,

649
00:46:45.960 --> 00:46:51.119
why not do something more meaningful,
Why not be more than just a paycheck.

650
00:46:51.760 --> 00:46:54.559
We can do those things and still
be professional. We can talk about

651
00:46:54.599 --> 00:47:00.079
serious things and still have a professional
workplace where we're caring about performance, but

652
00:47:00.760 --> 00:47:06.639
people care more when they know they're
cared for and just giving them that giving

653
00:47:06.679 --> 00:47:10.159
them a place where they come and
they know that their support has their back,

654
00:47:10.199 --> 00:47:15.119
their leaders have their back and know
what's going on. It changes the

655
00:47:15.199 --> 00:47:19.239
dynamic of the relationship. And I
hope that we can keep that culture inside

656
00:47:19.280 --> 00:47:23.199
of Tuaris. And certainly I would
encourage all the other people in leadership roles

657
00:47:24.159 --> 00:47:29.199
that are your listeners to consider that
we don't want to go to work and

658
00:47:29.239 --> 00:47:31.400
hate where we go. We want
to go to work and be proud of

659
00:47:31.440 --> 00:47:35.199
where we are and know that we're
around people that care for us. And

660
00:47:35.280 --> 00:47:37.280
all we have to do is show
that love and we're going to get a

661
00:47:37.280 --> 00:47:43.239
good response. I completely agree.
We're almost at a time here justin and

662
00:47:43.239 --> 00:47:45.000
there's one more thing that I want
to presence for our listeners here as we

663
00:47:45.119 --> 00:47:50.559
close. You assert, and I
absolutely agree that the world needs more people

664
00:47:50.599 --> 00:47:54.000
who can change lives in a single
conversation. And so therefore the world needs

665
00:47:54.039 --> 00:47:57.599
you to be more real and intimate, you say, and the world needs

666
00:47:57.639 --> 00:48:01.199
you to take a risk. Would
you, in just say thirty seconds just

667
00:48:02.119 --> 00:48:07.079
add to that or however, we
want to close sure each of us have

668
00:48:07.119 --> 00:48:12.679
a voice, a life, experience, a perspective, or an ability that

669
00:48:13.039 --> 00:48:16.800
matters on a much greater scale than
we're ever realize. It doesn't matter if

670
00:48:16.840 --> 00:48:21.360
we witness the result of what we're
doing. It just matters that we live

671
00:48:21.360 --> 00:48:23.280
in the present and see the opportunity
to show love and to build up other

672
00:48:23.280 --> 00:48:28.760
people. We have a short life, and in that short time we can

673
00:48:28.800 --> 00:48:30.840
make the world a little bit better
than it is. And our greatest strength

674
00:48:30.880 --> 00:48:35.800
may be in our greatest weakness.
But we have to be willing to share

675
00:48:35.840 --> 00:48:38.280
who we are in order to change
lives. And again, it may only

676
00:48:38.320 --> 00:48:44.119
take one conversation. What a beautiful
contribution you have been to me and to

677
00:48:44.199 --> 00:48:47.519
my listeners today, Justin thank you
so very much for joining us. Thank

678
00:48:47.559 --> 00:48:52.639
you listeners. If you want to
learn more about Justin and his thought leadership

679
00:48:52.679 --> 00:48:54.400
and just at the way he walks
through life and what you might be able

680
00:48:54.400 --> 00:48:58.360
to learn from him, I encourage
you to visit his blog, It's love

681
00:48:58.440 --> 00:49:01.400
in Leadership dot org. Last week, if you missed the live show,

682
00:49:01.440 --> 00:49:05.000
you know is catch it be a
recorded podcast. Believe it or not,

683
00:49:05.079 --> 00:49:07.480
we were on air with none other
than Sanna and missus clause right here in

684
00:49:07.559 --> 00:49:10.760
my office studio tis the season.
You know, I have to have that

685
00:49:10.840 --> 00:49:15.079
for the holidays. We had a
joyous conversation about the wonder of the season

686
00:49:15.119 --> 00:49:20.199
and the importance of meaningfulness and living
with daily gratitude. It was fantastic.

687
00:49:20.840 --> 00:49:22.880
Next week, we'll be on There
with Jeanette McConnell as she shares her year

688
00:49:22.920 --> 00:49:28.480
long journey in a trans transformative leadership
program that culminated in a trip to Antarctica.

689
00:49:29.000 --> 00:49:30.039
See you there. Remember that works
at least one third of our life,

690
00:49:30.119 --> 00:49:38.840
So let's work on purpose. We
hope you've enjoyed this week's program.

691
00:49:39.239 --> 00:49:44.920
Be sure to tune in to Working
on Purpose, featuring your host Alis Cortes,

692
00:49:45.280 --> 00:49:49.960
each week on the Voice America Empowerment
Channel. This week, find your

693
00:49:50.039 --> 00:50:00.760
life's purpose at work to