Can Choice and Courage Help You Live the Live You Want?

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There are some people that make their
work just another thing they have to do,

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and there are those that make their
work something that they want to do.

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Welcome to Working on Purpose with your
host Elise Cortez. In our program,

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we provide guidance and inspiration from those
people who have found deeper meaning and

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personal connection to their work life.
It's beyond nine to five. It's working

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on Purpose. Now Here is your
host, Elise Cortez. Welcome back to

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the Working on Purpose Show. Thanks
for tuning in again this week. I'm

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your host, Elise Cortez, joining
from Dallas, Texas, which is home

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base for me. This program is
all about helping people more meaningfully and productively

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connect with their work and equipping organizations
to do the same for their employees.

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So I bring on guests of a
particular perspective or experience that I think expands

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that conversation. I also draw on
my meeting work research I've been doing over

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the last fifteen years, as well
as from my own consulting experience, including

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the work I do today at Insigniam, which is a global management consulting firm.

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I'll get to the program in just
a moment. Let me think my

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media partner and sponsor jobbing dot Com. Jobbing dot com is the leading locally

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focused job board in the nation.
They are dedicated at helping employers find quality

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talent in their own backyard and giving
job seekers control over their search so they

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can find work close to home.
Great partnership. Thank you jobbing dot Com.

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Last week, if you miss the
live show, you can always catch

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it via recorded podcast. We were
on the air with doctor Darren Martin,

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who is the culture architect and an
author and keynote speaker. We talked about

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the incredibly low rate of twenty nine
percent employee engagement in the average company in

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the United States, what some companies
are doing to encourage that dismal rate to

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make it even worse, and what
the winners are doing to drastically improve it.

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With us this week is Diane McClay, who is a certified professional whole

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person coach who helps midlife professionals navigate
career transitions through choice and courage to make

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meaningful change. She's also the co
author of Dreaming Big, Being Bold,

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Inspiring Stories from Trailblazers, visionaries,
and change Makers. We'll be talking about

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the key concept she coaches from and
her own journey from once our own dream

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job to what she does need to
help others find their own dream careers.

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And I enjoyed us today from Portland, Oregon, where I live for several

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years. So I have to live
my cares with through your experience, Diane,

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welcome to Working on Purpose. Thank
you, Alis. I appreciate the

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opportunity to be here. I'm super
excited me too. I really appreciate that

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our last conversation. I love our
energy, I love our synergy, and

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I want to give you over to
my listeners. So let's jump in.

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Awesome, let's do it. Okay, So some context to start here is

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always good. So I want to
just help our listeners understand. It's always

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interesting to hear people say why they
do the work that they do. So

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your story of being catapulted into change
from a career you loved to inventing something

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totally new, what's your story?
Well, my story is that I have

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had the opportunity and the blessing to
reinvent into a second dream career. As

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a kid, I wanted to be
a park ranger. I had the opportunity

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to get a degree in recreation management
in college, and then the next twenty

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two years of my life was nothing
but a dream where one job ended,

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there was always another exciting job out
in the field of recreation waiting for me.

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I did all the right things.
I moved into you know, I

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acquired responsibility, I acquired rank,
I moved up in promotions. I moved

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around the country and finally landed in
the agency that I felt like was my

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family and my home, and I
moved into management. At that point,

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I was an awesome field operator.
When I moved into management, some things

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changed. The value systems that I
was working with as a field operator were

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different in management. And then as
a new manager, I made some mistakes,

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and those mistakes actually led me to
kind of a painful separation with my

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agency. At the time, it
was a choice that I made because I

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felt like the the parallel path of
my personal life and my professional life were

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now splitting in two different directions.
Fast full word. I had the opportunity

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to work in a rebound job,
realized that was just a paycheck, and

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then I realized that I had a
deeper calling to help people, to be

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connected to people and use synergy and
empathy to help people work through similar situations.

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So I jumped into life coaching,
writing and having the opportunity to run

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my own business. And you know, you are incredibly articulate. I've really

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appreciated about you and frankly learned something
from you in that way too, Diane.

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So it's incredible. So all the
more reason that I'm interested. If

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you can just say, why did
you want to be a park ranger?

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What was it about that field that
drew you or that position? You know,

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my dad worked in a fishery use
division for the state of Michigan for

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thirty years, so I think that
partly led into my desire to be to

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care for the outdoors and to care
for the animals that might be in it,

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and to connect people to it.
My dad always said, you know,

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figure out what you love to do, and then figure out how to

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get paid for it. Or conversely, he said, you know, don't

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ever get paid to do what you
love, because it'll turn into a job

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and you'll hate And I learned that
somewhere in the middle there was a balance

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between the two. I had this
magical belief in first grade that to be

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a park ranger you had to be
born inside a national park boundary and know

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the wildflowers by the time you were
five in Latin, and that wasn't true.

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It really was just education and commitment
and dedication and following through with something

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that called me. So that's what
I did. M brilliant, brilliant,

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and I have to if you don't
mind, I appreciate so much the authenticity

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of how you connect and communicate in
this conversation already, I'm interested in the

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nature of that rebound job that was
just a paycheck. Can you share a

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little bit about that? I can
you know? After I left my dream

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job. I live in a small
town out here in the Pacific Northwest,

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and I know I have a lot
of life skills in me. I know

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how to handle people, difficult situations, money. I'm a problem solver by

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nature. That's one of my superpowers. And I literally walked down to my

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local hardware store. I knew that
they had somebody leaving on their staff,

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and I walked up to the owner
and I I basically told him why he

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needed to hire me. I didn't
even ask for a job. I said,

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Hey, I know you have an
opening. Here's what I can do

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for you. Short of learning what
products you have and what the pricing is

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I can jump right in and hit
the ground running, and I can benefit

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your customers. And part of the
reason that sold him on me for the

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job is I had I told him
that I had been a consumer of my

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community for a long time, meaning
I shop here, but I don't really

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contribute to the community. And I
wanted to build my network. I wanted

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to get to know the people in
my small town. And what better way

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to do that than in a retail
sales job in your in your local hardware

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store. How could he say no, right? How could he say didn't?

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He said when could you start?
And then I actually technically started for

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him before the final resignation papers hit
my old up, my old office.

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Wow. So I want to talk
about that, Diane, because I know

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that there are listeners right now who
have been in that position where they've had

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to walk away from a long career
they'd loved. Maybe it wasn't their choice,

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maybe it wasn't there there what they
really wanted, but that's how it

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went down. I want to understand
what was hard to walk away from.

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Oh gosh, I mean when you
put twenty two years, I'm forty nine,

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so at the time I was forty
five when this happened, so literally

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half my life. My joke is
I was institutionalized for you know, for

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half my life. But but I
what was hard is that was my family

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that you know, I spent more
time with those people than I spent with

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my real family. That was my
network, It was my identity, it

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was my community. It was the
way I defined myself. You and I

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talked earlier in a different conversation about
what identities we assume when we're at work

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and when we're at home, and
so imagine taking everything you know about yourself

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and then overnight having it be gone. The uniform I wore was no longer

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in my closet. I actually had
to make choices about what kind of shirts

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I wore. Yet every day.
It sounds weird, but I never had

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to do that. I didn't have
a resume, I didn't have a plan

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B. And so the biggest thing
that was the loss for me was my

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network in my community, the people
that I coached, the people that I

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worked with, They were truly the
hardest thing to walk away from. I

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really get that we work with a
lot of fortune. Five had our companies

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that when they lose people, they
periodically go through downsizings, etc. And

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they lose people that, just like
you said, they've been working with for

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ten, twenty, sometimes more years, and it feels like a family.

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So it feels like a death.
Why when they leave. I really appreciate

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what you said there, you know, in the thank you, and I

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think the hard part for me was
that I had a lot of shame.

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You know, even though it was
my choice to leave, at the time

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that I was leaving, I felt
like I had no choice, and there

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was a lot of guilt and shame
and embarrassment that I carried with me as

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I left the office. You know, there was a lot of that,

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well what are people saying about me
before I left? When you have situations

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like this that the people that are
left behind don't get the answers they need

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to have closure, the people that
are in charge don't give answers because they're

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either legally not allowed to or it's
easier not to. And so it was

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a kind of an awkward death or
an awkward closure because I didn't get to

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really connect with the people that were
meaningful to me. They didn't know if

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they could reach out to me.
And there was probably about a year that

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there was sort of this in limbo
of what's the right thing to do.

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Do I reach out to the people
who I left behind, or do I

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just let them move on with their
job and try to heal on my own.

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How incredibly painful that drawn out experience, I can't imagine. Yeah,

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it was. But I would tell
you today, and I would tell your

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listeners that I'm a better version of
myself because that happens, and because I

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had that pain, and because I
had that experience, Oh, I can

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appreciate that. I certainly think that
my divorce has ushered in a whole new

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level of being for me, and
I'm grateful for that experience. It wasn't

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easy, it wasn't fun, but
it has I completely know what you mean.

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It has helped me transform to what
I think is a better human being,

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and I think living at a higher, more appreciative level of the rest

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of my life. Definitely, And
I think it makes you realize that the

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people who are really truly a part
of your family and your network and your

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support system and your resilience circle,
they're going to be there for you.

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It took me some time because there
was awkwardness there, but the people you

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know the people that are going to
be there and who love you and support

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you regardless of what's happening. They're
still going to show up and they're going

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to be in your life even though
your relationship may be a little bit different.

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Yes, and then there's the new, wonderful compliment of people that come

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into your path that you would have
never imagined or never predicted. Indeed,

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and I would tell you now that
the title of my chapter, and Dreaming

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Big, being Bold, is the
other side, and we'll get to that

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a little bit. But part of
what I know now by being on the

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other side of that pain is I
actually needed to create that space by letting

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go of some of the old things
that didn't serve me, and the old

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relationships that didn't serve me, and
the new relationships and new things that have

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come into my life. Because I
was able to create that space serve my

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purpose and my passion to a higher
degree than all the years that I spent

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doing what I thought I was going
to retire at Brilliant, Absolutely brilliant.

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I'm just so glad that I think
you found me somewhere. I think it

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was on LinkedIn. I'm so glad
you did and it's just so wonderful to

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have you now in my life.
Thank you well, you're welcome and back

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at you. You know, I
believe in synchronicity. I also do not

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believe in any coincidences. I believe
that everything happens for a reason, whether

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it's God ordained or whether it's just
part of the universe telling you what needs

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to happen in your life. But
you came into my life when I was

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doing an interview series and that was
amazing. So here we are. It

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was great gobs of fun too well, and that gets me to my next

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question. There are probably several listeners
here who are very intrigued with the idea

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that you have reinvented yourself and now
you're actually a coach yourself. So I'm

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interested in having you share how it
was you chose to become a coach.

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Why that? Why didn't you go
off and go into marketing or accounting or

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become an artist. You became a
coach? Why that? I did you

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know? It's it's funny. As
I've been in this last interview series,

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we're talking a lot about listening to
your gut, or listening to the voice

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that's in your head that might tell
you there's something different out there for you.

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And when you know, I really
had that question what am I going

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to do now? When I left
my agency and I had a friend of

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mine. First of all, you
know, I was panicked about where's the

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money going to come from and how
am I going to survive? And I'd

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say, I don't know what I'm
going to do now, And my friend

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said, isn't that interesting? You
have no idea what you're going to do

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next. So, first of all, that that rephrasing and re energizing of

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that statement space again for me to
be curious about what could happen next.

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Then one of the things I did
is I ask myself three questions, what

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can I do? What am I
willing to do? And what am I

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not willing to do? And I
realized that if the bank collectors were coming

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to repossess my house or my car, a lot of the things on the

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what I'm not willing to do list
would suddenly move over to the I'm capable

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or I'm willing to do it lists. So that's one, but two,

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I actually had a little voice in
my head that I had heard a story

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of a friend of mine who said
one day, I want to be a

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life coach, and I had absolutely
no idea what a life coach was,

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but that was rolling around in my
head. I have had other friends throughout

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my life who have jokingly said,
Hey, can I make you my personal

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life coach? Can I call you
what I need you? Will you be

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my two o'clock in the morning sitting
on the ledge friends? And what I

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realized is there were authentic pieces of
me that have always been in existence,

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even when I was a park ranger, even when I was a manager,

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that I was putting into the other
parts of my job. I loved coaching

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and mentoring my staff. I love
developing people. I loved helping people solve

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their own problems and find their own
power. And I just did that authentically.

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So literally, on a whim,
I looked up coaching in Portland,

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Oregon. I came across Coach Training
World with Master Coach Farosian Night, called

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her up, had a beautiful,
wonderful, energetic, synergizing conversation, and

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literally in that phone call, I
said, Okay, this is for me.

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I'm going to do it. This
is home, this is my trade.

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I need to present something that you
said for our listeners. And I

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know you probably know this because of
the work that you do, but it's

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just it was so subtle and beautiful
when you said, just changing the way

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that you uttered that sentence about you
don't know what you're going to do,

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kind of thing allowed and opened to
space for you is what you said.

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Yeah, in my in my world, the work that we do at Insignium,

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which is organizational and professional transformation.
You know this, Diane. That

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possibility statement is what ushers in the
possibility of transformation and absent that you can't

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always create. And that's what you
did. You opened the space for yourself.

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And I think that is so good
for our listeners to hear that engaging

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and enticing possibility into our plan,
especially when we're scared like that can be

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so incredibly useful and yield something really
amazing well indeed, and I think sometimes

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it's just a question of changing the
question or changing how we ask it.

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You know, what am I going
to do next? Is downfall and negative?

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What am I going to do next? Is open and energizing and inviting

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and curious. Well, and then
we can add what am I going to

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do next? Right? You can
put a kind of parts of the sentence

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and create all sorts of different options. That's right. That's right, and

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it's still though. There is this
one little word there that's really important.

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There's a couple of words, but
one in particular that I wanted to make

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sure we talked about, and that's
courage. It came to you when you

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needed it the most, and you
exercised choice in that pivotal moment at the

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time of your life. And I
know those are core components of who you

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are and what you coach from.
Can you talk a bit about that?

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Sure? You know when I left
the first part, you know courage First

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of all, it doesn't show up
when you're sitting on a park bench eating

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ice cream and life is good.
I mean, this shows up when stuff

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hits the fan and when it's hard. But the other part that was really

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pivotal for me was choice, and
they kind of go hand in hand.

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When I first left my job and
I was in pain and I was not

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wanting to take responsibility for some of
the pieces that I owned. The story

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I told was I got fired.
They pushed me out and pushed my chair

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close to the door. When I
realized later as I started to heal,

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and I could be honest with myself
was that that wasn't true. What was

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true was I made the choice to
resign. And as soon as I realized

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that, literally at least, there
was a felt like there was a softball

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size wat of power that was sitting
underneath my diaphragm, in my solar plexus

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that I literally suddenly became aware of
that was mine. It was my choice

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to leave. And as soon as
I started telling the story that it was

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my choice to leave, it reframed
everything about how I started living my life.

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And it made me realize we have
a lot more choice in everything we

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do, and sometimes it takes courage
just to make that first choice to get

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things started so beautifully and crisply articulated. And what I'll say is that oftentimes

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when I'm speaking to audiences, I
will say, especially as an identity researcher,

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Diane, you and I talked about
this, I tell my audience says,

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well, guess what you are the
author of your life story, and

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guess what that means. You get
to be the editor too, right,

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And so if you don't don't like
the way your life story sounds or the

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way it comes out, for you
then edit it, change it. Were

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the one who's in charge of that, and you did that beautifully. Thank

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you, Thank you. You know
that was really for your listeners. I

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would tell you that that's the powerful
moment is when you get to own something

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that is yours that nobody can take
away. The agency couldn't take it away,

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the pain couldn't take it away.
It was mine. I owned it,

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I created it, It lived and
still does live inside me. And

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it's amazing what kind of what kind
of things you can start accomplishing when you

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realize that you have something that nobody
can take away. I think of one

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of my favorite movies is Shawshank Redemption, and I think of Andy gets put

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in the hold and he is in
his head, He's playing opera music and

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he was telling the fellows how he
survived was because he had that music in

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his head that the warden could not
ever take away. And I feel like

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that energy and that courage and that
choice is very similar to that scene in

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Shawshank. What a beautiful way to
take us into our first break, Diane.

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I'm your host, Alice Cortez.
We were on the air with Diane

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00:18:57.880 --> 00:19:03.559
McClay, who is a sified professional
Whole person coach who helps midlife professionals navigate

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career transitions through choice and courage to
make meaningful change. She was also the

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00:19:07.839 --> 00:19:11.640
co author of Dreamy Big, Being
Bold, inspiring stories from Trailblazers, visionaries

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00:19:11.680 --> 00:19:15.559
and change makers. She joins today
from Portland, Oregon. We'll talk more

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after the break. Stay with us, We'll be right back. Friend us

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00:19:26.599 --> 00:19:30.079
on Facebook to keep up with what's
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00:19:32.759 --> 00:19:37.000
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Now back to Working on Purpose.
Thanks for staying with us, and welcome

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00:21:55.960 --> 00:21:57.880
back to Working on Purpose if you're
just joining us. My guest is Diane

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McClay, who is a sort of
by professional whole person coach who helps midlife

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00:22:02.880 --> 00:22:07.960
professionals navigate career transitions through choice and
courage to make meaningful change. We've been

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00:22:07.000 --> 00:22:11.319
talking a bit about her own story, her own history of what got her

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here today and some of the things
that helped her along the way that she

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now uses to help coach other people
along their way. For this next bit

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of segment, here, Diane,
I want to talk about the book that

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you've got a chapter in and it's
again called Dreaming Big, Being Bold,

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inspiring stories from trailblazers, visionaries and
change makers, and I love it.

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It's just it's great and not only
is it in a beautiful cover, but

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the content is spectacular. And one
of the things that you say in there

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that I really appreciate it is that
you said, if you're not nervous,

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you're not growing, and that vulnerability
is your source of power. That's incredibly

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provocative. Let's hear a little bit
more about that. Well, I can't

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take complete credit for that. I
work with a life coach myself, Nicole

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Peterman from zen Red NYC. And
when I was in some of the deepest

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parts of my pain, and I
had a lot of question about who I

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was and why this happened to me
and why I was feeling so much pain.

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As I was talking, my coach
recognized that I was at an extremely

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vulnerable place. I mean, there
was a point where you could say the

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word blue and I would start crying, and you know, I didn't.

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I grew up not wanting to to
show that I was crying, not wanting

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to be weak, not wanting to
be vulnerable, feeling like I had to

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work things out on my own and
not ask for help. And my coach

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pointed out to me that at the
point where you are feeling your most vulnerable,

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that is actually where that there's an
intersection between your vulnerability and your power.

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And for me, it's in that
solar plexus area where that ball of

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power resides every day and again,
it's reframing how you look at it when

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if you don't see it as being
vulnerable, but you see it as okay,

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it can't get any worse than this, or at least right now it

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doesn't feel like it can get any
worse. Now you get the opportunity to

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say, how can I start making
it better? What's one thing I can

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do differently to start gaining my strength
back, you know, gain my reliance

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on myself back, and learning about
how to move myself forward. And so

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that's what my coach was meaning,
where vulnerability it really actually is the source

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of where your power comes from.
That is incredible and how I hope for

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our listeners, I hope they find
that to be hopelessly encouraging. And then

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along those lines too, the notion
that that kind of a place can actually

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give power to you. And what
you said about just do one thing to

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move you forward. My coach,
Sean Anderson tells me the same thing all

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the time. He's been amazing to
me. It's always in my corner.

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And then the other thing that I
also want to call that what you said

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about you know you grow up not
wanting to show you that you would cry

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about something. One of the things
that we do here at Insignium is when

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we're talking about, especially inspirational leadership, we really encourage people and certain leaders

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to be able to delve into and
lean into their full complement of human emotion.

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And how beautiful is that. And
so when we can actually show that

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we're vulnerable and therefore we're authentic and
we're accessible, people trust us. People

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want to be around that, right, And then when we can actually show

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them when we get moved, touched
and inspired or hurt by something, whether

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that's a tear or just you know, you're just moved, is incredibly enrolling

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for people. So I just really
want to call it what you said that

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it's incredibly powerful what you're talking about. Thank you, and I receive that.

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You know, it's about it's about
being authentic. And you know,

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we all know that when we engage, whether we buy something, or we

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create a relationship or there's a network
that we engage with, there's a gup

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feeling that we have about whether somebody
is being genuine or not. And it's

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not necessarily about crying or being super
raw emotional, but it's about being able

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to convey the weaknesses that you had
or the sense of vulnerability in a way

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that you can, you can connect
with people at the same level of authenticity

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that they have. And I think
that that's important when we talk about coaching

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in particular, because we're asking our
clients to share with us their most vulnerable

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points. And vulnerability is also a
beautiful place to teach from because we all

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have it, whether whatever it looks
like, we all have it, We've

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all experienced it, and it's a
universal theme that we can all relate to

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in a very short period of time. Beautiful, Diane, incredible. Okay,

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So next, what I want to
talk about along those same lines,

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I like very much whenever I can
to really kind of give our listeners a

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mini package, if you will.
And you've got five concepts that you work

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and coach from that you talk about
in that chapter book, and I'd love

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to be able to treat each one
of them if we can. So the

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first one, of course, is
awareness, and if you could talk a

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little bit about this and maybe tell
a story or give an example of each

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of these concepts as we go,
that would be I think incredibly useful for

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our listeners. Okay, we can
do that. So for me, especially

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with my outdoor background and being connected
to the land. I do a lot

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of hiking out in the Pacific Northwest, and for me, awareness is it's

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what's going on around you. It's
what's going on in your environment. It's

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also what's going on inside you.
But the analogy I like to use is

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00:27:18.559 --> 00:27:23.039
it's like hiking with a map or
an interpretive guide. You have some information

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00:27:23.160 --> 00:27:27.480
about what's happening around you that helps
you get where you want to go.

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00:27:29.039 --> 00:27:33.599
So quick example would be super easy. Quick example would be is that I

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00:27:33.640 --> 00:27:38.440
don't believe that you can make a
change until you're aware that either a change

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00:27:38.440 --> 00:27:42.279
has been made around you or that
one needs to be made. So,

401
00:27:42.359 --> 00:27:47.799
for example, in my job,
there is things happening behind the scenes that

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00:27:47.880 --> 00:27:51.720
I was not aware of that was
happening, and when it finally got caught

403
00:27:51.799 --> 00:27:56.720
up with me, it forced a
change. It forced a divergence in my

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personal and professional life. Until I
was aware of that was I was wandering

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00:28:02.839 --> 00:28:07.400
around blissfully ignorant of kind of some
of the political things that were going on

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00:28:07.640 --> 00:28:12.079
behind the scenes and some of the
expectations that I was not meeting for my

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00:28:12.200 --> 00:28:18.200
managers. So it was a complete
shock to me when I got the phone

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00:28:18.200 --> 00:28:19.279
call that said, hey, you
need to be in your office at one

409
00:28:19.480 --> 00:28:23.160
thirty. I need to talk to
you. So as soon as that phone

410
00:28:23.160 --> 00:28:26.200
call came in, I had awareness. My gut went, oh, this

411
00:28:26.240 --> 00:28:30.319
doesn't feel good. I started collecting
my personal items, even though I had

412
00:28:30.319 --> 00:28:34.799
no reason to believe I needed to. So another quick, simple example is

413
00:28:36.240 --> 00:28:40.720
if you go to the doctor and
the doctor says, hey, you're pre

414
00:28:40.799 --> 00:28:44.319
diabetic. You need to start watching
the sugar in your in your diet,

415
00:28:45.079 --> 00:28:48.160
you wouldn't. You may not change
what you're eating until you get that information

416
00:28:48.359 --> 00:28:52.759
or that awareness from an outside source
that tells you that you need to change.

417
00:28:53.240 --> 00:28:57.720
Does that make sense? Yes?
Indeed it does, yes, and

418
00:28:57.400 --> 00:29:02.480
that's it's incredibly In fact, I
had an insight about that for myself,

419
00:29:02.519 --> 00:29:03.680
and I won't talk about it now
because it's not relative to this, but

420
00:29:03.720 --> 00:29:07.880
it just gave me a wonderful access
to an AHA for me. Thank you,

421
00:29:07.920 --> 00:29:11.319
Diane. That was great. Oh
you're welcome. Great, I'm glad

422
00:29:11.319 --> 00:29:14.880
I could do that. Yeah,
right here on air. That's awesome.

423
00:29:15.519 --> 00:29:18.359
So you know, awareness is you
have to have it. It's either going

424
00:29:18.400 --> 00:29:22.880
to come to you like my job
situation, or you're going to choose it.

425
00:29:22.319 --> 00:29:25.920
Another one might be oh, you
know, I didn't stick with my

426
00:29:25.920 --> 00:29:29.279
New Year's resolutions. I really want
to start working out more. Well,

427
00:29:29.640 --> 00:29:33.279
my awareness is maybe I need to
work out more because my pants don't fit

428
00:29:33.319 --> 00:29:34.960
the way I want them to.
Okay, now what am I going to

429
00:29:36.039 --> 00:29:41.079
do with that information? So awareness
comes, and again I want to re

430
00:29:41.160 --> 00:29:45.799
emphasize, it's like a roadmap.
It's happening. There's awareness inside your body.

431
00:29:45.000 --> 00:29:48.000
There are people that are kinesthetic learners, that have energy and they can

432
00:29:48.039 --> 00:29:52.319
feel things. We can see things, we can sense things. We can

433
00:29:52.359 --> 00:29:55.839
ask the people around us, hey, what do you see about what's going

434
00:29:55.880 --> 00:29:57.960
on? You know how many of
us have asked our our partners are led

435
00:29:59.000 --> 00:30:03.079
ones, hey do these pants make
my butt look big? We look for

436
00:30:03.200 --> 00:30:07.519
that feedback, We look for that
awareness from other people around us. So

437
00:30:07.680 --> 00:30:10.839
once we get it, that kind
of leads into the second step, which

438
00:30:10.839 --> 00:30:15.960
is creating options. Okay, go
ahead, creating options. So it's once

439
00:30:15.079 --> 00:30:21.839
our ability to receive information has come
in, then we literally get to say,

440
00:30:22.079 --> 00:30:23.440
what am I going to do with
it? Am I going to ignore

441
00:30:23.440 --> 00:30:27.400
it and keep doing what I'm doing? Am I going to create an action

442
00:30:27.440 --> 00:30:32.440
plan to change what I'm doing?
How do I feel about it do I

443
00:30:32.480 --> 00:30:34.759
want to change it in big strides
like Hey, my pants don't fit,

444
00:30:34.799 --> 00:30:37.279
so I'm going to go run a
marathon, or am I going to do

445
00:30:37.279 --> 00:30:41.640
it in little bitty increments like Hey, my pants don't fit and I'm going

446
00:30:41.680 --> 00:30:44.519
to go take the dog for a
walk for an hour every day. Right,

447
00:30:44.680 --> 00:30:48.720
we get to start putting options in
front of us, and my belief

448
00:30:48.839 --> 00:30:52.960
is as soon as you have an
option, you have a choice. So

449
00:30:52.079 --> 00:30:55.640
for me, I told you I
had three questions when I quit my job.

450
00:30:56.240 --> 00:30:59.319
What am I willing to do?
What can I do? And what

451
00:30:59.400 --> 00:31:03.519
am I not willing to do?
And I literally just listed anything that came

452
00:31:03.559 --> 00:31:08.680
to my vision in those three categories, because what I'm capable of doing might

453
00:31:08.720 --> 00:31:15.079
be very different than what I want
to do. So then I started going

454
00:31:15.079 --> 00:31:19.079
down the list and I started saying, where's the crossover? What am I

455
00:31:19.119 --> 00:31:22.240
willing to do? And what can
I do? And will that make me

456
00:31:22.279 --> 00:31:26.079
happy? That's what led me to
kind of the retail hardware store is.

457
00:31:26.119 --> 00:31:30.759
I put together a list of things
that I was capable of doing and then

458
00:31:30.960 --> 00:31:37.799
cross referenced them to the local options
that were available to me. And Bob's

459
00:31:37.839 --> 00:31:41.759
your uncle. I had a job, Bob's your uncle. I've never heard

460
00:31:41.799 --> 00:31:45.039
that before. I've had to explain
that to a lot of people. That

461
00:31:45.119 --> 00:31:51.359
might be a Midwest term that somehow
is incorporated into my vernacular. I think.

462
00:31:51.400 --> 00:31:55.279
So, Okay, I really appreciate
that idea of creating options. What

463
00:31:55.319 --> 00:31:57.400
I also like about that is just
you know, the core word they're creating,

464
00:31:59.000 --> 00:32:01.400
and there's something about that that that
that's generative, right, There's that

465
00:32:01.480 --> 00:32:06.839
that's that it's energetic, and it's
just I really appreciate that. And I

466
00:32:06.880 --> 00:32:08.720
do think that your model of you
know, what you said before about what

467
00:32:08.799 --> 00:32:10.480
am I willing to do? What
can I do? What am I not

468
00:32:10.519 --> 00:32:14.960
willing to do? Is incredibly useful, and that also is giving me access

469
00:32:14.960 --> 00:32:17.960
to something as well for myself.
Yet again, Diane, so this is

470
00:32:19.000 --> 00:32:20.680
good, my Bill. At the
end of the show, I was going

471
00:32:20.759 --> 00:32:23.079
to say, this is good.
Okay, anything else you want to see

472
00:32:23.200 --> 00:32:27.640
on creating options before we go to
make choices? No, I think we

473
00:32:27.680 --> 00:32:30.799
can go right into that. Okay, go for it. So the beautiful

474
00:32:30.839 --> 00:32:34.680
thing about once you have an option
is and I love how you said,

475
00:32:34.799 --> 00:32:37.960
it's a it's kind of a forward
projecting action. Once you know, I

476
00:32:38.160 --> 00:32:42.240
kind of use an analogy of picking
ice cream. You know, once you

477
00:32:42.359 --> 00:32:45.839
decide that you're not going to have
your favorite ice cream, you now have

478
00:32:45.920 --> 00:32:51.640
to go through the making choices part. And choice is again, I'm going

479
00:32:51.680 --> 00:32:55.960
to tell you that I feel like
it's really really powerful and and I often

480
00:32:57.000 --> 00:33:02.200
say not making a choice is a
choice because you're not moving forward. You're

481
00:33:02.240 --> 00:33:06.720
saying, I'm going to accept the
information that I have and I'm not going

482
00:33:06.759 --> 00:33:08.240
to do anything about it, and
I'm going to be okay with that,

483
00:33:08.680 --> 00:33:12.799
or I'm going to pretend like I'm
gonna be okay with that. So the

484
00:33:12.839 --> 00:33:15.960
beautiful thing about making choices is you
don't have to do one hundred and eighty

485
00:33:15.960 --> 00:33:22.039
degree turn if you make one small
choice, like, for example, if

486
00:33:22.079 --> 00:33:23.839
I wanted to give up sugar,
instead of just saying, hey, I'm

487
00:33:23.839 --> 00:33:29.559
going to give up sugar tomorrow on
everything, I might say tomorrow at breakfast,

488
00:33:29.680 --> 00:33:31.880
instead of putting sugar in my coffee, I'm going to use honey.

489
00:33:32.400 --> 00:33:37.359
That's one small change. Now,
if I did that for thirty days,

490
00:33:37.400 --> 00:33:39.359
that would create a habit and it
would be easier for me to give up

491
00:33:39.359 --> 00:33:44.079
sugar and other parts of my life. But the beautiful, beautiful, thing

492
00:33:44.160 --> 00:33:49.839
about options and choice going hand in
hand is one begets the other. And

493
00:33:50.799 --> 00:33:57.079
I believe that small choices, one
degree of change over time, leads to

494
00:33:57.160 --> 00:34:00.240
big, big, dramatic changes.
You know, I could, I could

495
00:34:00.279 --> 00:34:04.240
cite a lot of different examples,
but just for your listeners, think of

496
00:34:04.279 --> 00:34:07.280
anything in your life where you wanted
one thing to change. Maybe you drove

497
00:34:07.320 --> 00:34:12.239
differently to your work, maybe you
ordered something different off the menu. Maybe

498
00:34:12.239 --> 00:34:15.440
you've got a different glass of wine
because you were curious what it tasted like.

499
00:34:15.880 --> 00:34:20.559
As soon as you make one small
change, you now have more information

500
00:34:21.039 --> 00:34:25.719
that will feed the next change you
want to make. That is so brilliantly

501
00:34:25.800 --> 00:34:30.800
simple. It's so elegantly simple,
it really is. And and I also

502
00:34:30.840 --> 00:34:32.599
what I also like about that one
too, Diane, is it to me

503
00:34:34.039 --> 00:34:37.920
there's a connection to the creation piece, because when you make choices, you're

504
00:34:37.000 --> 00:34:44.880
creating new possibilities again for yourself,
you know. And it's it's when you're

505
00:34:45.000 --> 00:34:47.440
when you're going through a big dramatic
change. I mean, there were there

506
00:34:47.440 --> 00:34:52.679
were days that figuring out which T
shirt I was going to wear or which

507
00:34:52.719 --> 00:34:55.000
couch I was going to sleep on
was the biggest choice I needed to make

508
00:34:55.039 --> 00:35:00.119
that day. And you know,
and it was a tough decision, but

509
00:35:00.760 --> 00:35:08.000
you break big decisions into smaller,
more manageable chunks, and one day,

510
00:35:08.000 --> 00:35:13.920
one day goes by, and it's
been four and a half years since since

511
00:35:13.960 --> 00:35:16.280
I had that big pain point that
made me feel like my life ended,

512
00:35:16.880 --> 00:35:20.760
And it was a series of small
Today, I'm going to get up and

513
00:35:20.800 --> 00:35:22.440
go for a walk. Today I'm
going to go to yoga. And now

514
00:35:22.559 --> 00:35:28.000
yoga is a part of my practice
every day because I made one choice at

515
00:35:28.000 --> 00:35:31.719
one point in my journey to try
a class, and that might get us

516
00:35:31.719 --> 00:35:36.320
to our fourth concept. I'm guessing
what you call incorporate movement. Yes,

517
00:35:36.760 --> 00:35:40.039
indeed, yes, and not just
physical movement. But you know, energy

518
00:35:40.119 --> 00:35:44.880
resides in the body and when we
have stress and we have negative emotions,

519
00:35:45.400 --> 00:35:49.159
and for me especially, this is
something that I've learned, is that my

520
00:35:49.239 --> 00:35:54.599
body retains energy in a lot of
different ways. So when I started going

521
00:35:54.639 --> 00:36:00.480
to yoga, I started becoming aware
of where my body was holding dress,

522
00:36:00.519 --> 00:36:04.760
not just my shoulders, but my
head or my chest or different muscle groups.

523
00:36:05.159 --> 00:36:09.679
I started using breath to lean into
those parts to give relief to them

524
00:36:09.719 --> 00:36:15.960
when they were in pain. And
then I started it wasn't just yoga,

525
00:36:15.119 --> 00:36:21.800
it was pilots, but it was
moving of the energy through meditation. These

526
00:36:21.800 --> 00:36:23.840
are all I grew up in the
Midwest, and that's all of that's kind

527
00:36:23.840 --> 00:36:29.800
of woo woo compared to what I
grew up to believe to be possible.

528
00:36:30.360 --> 00:36:35.639
And what I realized is as soon
as I start moving energetically, physically,

529
00:36:35.679 --> 00:36:42.159
emotionally, spiritually, it became easier
to see more choice, and it became

530
00:36:42.280 --> 00:36:49.719
easier to exercise courage to do something
completely different. I completely understand that.

531
00:36:49.760 --> 00:36:52.639
I know, for me, I'm
a very physically oriented person. I have

532
00:36:52.719 --> 00:36:55.039
to help my exercise. But now
you've given me a few other dimensions about

533
00:36:55.079 --> 00:37:00.239
movement there too, Diane, about
the energy within the body, within the

534
00:37:00.239 --> 00:37:05.559
mind. That I also appreciate you
presenting for us too amazing And if I

535
00:37:05.719 --> 00:37:07.920
could add to that. You know, when I was when I was a

536
00:37:07.920 --> 00:37:13.400
park ranger, I worked outside all
the time. I was physically moving everywhere.

537
00:37:14.079 --> 00:37:16.639
When I worked in the hardware store, was standing at a register.

538
00:37:16.920 --> 00:37:21.320
You know, I got excited when
I got to run outside and load lumber.

539
00:37:21.960 --> 00:37:24.719
But not just that part of the
physical thing, but when I left

540
00:37:24.760 --> 00:37:29.199
my job, the other thing that
I that took me a while to go

541
00:37:29.239 --> 00:37:32.719
back to is to go touch the
land and go to the places that I

542
00:37:32.840 --> 00:37:39.360
used to serve as a steward and
feel rejuvenated by the land and the energy

543
00:37:39.400 --> 00:37:44.400
that has on it. So,
in my pain point, I gave up

544
00:37:44.719 --> 00:37:49.519
this the very thing that fed my
soul, which was going out for hikes,

545
00:37:49.840 --> 00:37:52.639
sitting underneath the tree, bearing myself
in a pile of leaves, talking

546
00:37:52.679 --> 00:37:57.760
to the animals, watching the eagles
fly by. I gave that up because

547
00:37:57.800 --> 00:38:00.519
it was too painful for me to
connect to it, because I had been

548
00:38:00.599 --> 00:38:07.320
divorced from it. And when I
started giving myself permission to go back to

549
00:38:07.360 --> 00:38:13.280
those places and revisit the things that
fed my soul, my creativity opened up.

550
00:38:13.480 --> 00:38:16.159
The writer and me came back that
you know, I was able to

551
00:38:16.199 --> 00:38:22.199
see the beauty in the world that
has always been there, but I wasn't

552
00:38:22.239 --> 00:38:25.639
able to see because I was blinded
by pain. Two things are that really

553
00:38:25.679 --> 00:38:29.599
quick, and we got to cut
for a break. One is I also

554
00:38:29.679 --> 00:38:34.480
see that you're honoring that beautiful part
of your past that made you partly helped

555
00:38:34.519 --> 00:38:37.000
make you who you are in so
doing that and so going back to the

556
00:38:37.039 --> 00:38:39.599
land like that, and then too. The other piece that I see in

557
00:38:39.599 --> 00:38:45.320
that, Diane, is that you're
also giving access to yourself through to your

558
00:38:45.400 --> 00:38:51.119
various senses, which is so important
to enliven you and to give you new

559
00:38:51.159 --> 00:38:53.320
possibilities for yourself as well. I
saw those two things in what you said

560
00:38:53.320 --> 00:38:58.119
as well. Indeed, and I'll
just close with this last one is resilience,

561
00:38:58.440 --> 00:39:00.360
and that is that we're more resilient
than we think we are, and

562
00:39:00.519 --> 00:39:04.920
you know, almost there's not very
much that will actually kill us. It

563
00:39:05.039 --> 00:39:07.079
is true that if it doesn't kill
us, it will make us stronger.

564
00:39:08.400 --> 00:39:10.400
And we'll say a little bit more
about that when we come back from a

565
00:39:10.400 --> 00:39:15.159
break. I think that's really important. I'm Elie Cortes. I'm Elise Cortes,

566
00:39:15.239 --> 00:39:16.280
your host. We've been on the
year with Diane McClay, who is

567
00:39:16.320 --> 00:39:22.880
a certified professional whole person coach who
helps midlife professionals navigate career transitions through choice

568
00:39:22.880 --> 00:39:25.719
and courage to make meaningful change.
She was also the co author of Dreaming

569
00:39:25.719 --> 00:39:31.000
Big, Being Bold, Inspiring stories
from trailwaisers, visionaries and change makers.

570
00:39:31.199 --> 00:39:35.239
She joins today from Portland, Oregon. Stay with us, We'll be right

571
00:39:35.280 --> 00:39:45.760
back. Friend us on Facebook to
keep up with what's empowering the world.

572
00:39:46.239 --> 00:39:53.280
Voice America Empowerments. Alice Cortez is
a speaker and engagement and development catalyst.

573
00:39:53.440 --> 00:39:59.920
She designs and delivers professional development,
leadership and engagement workshops and can bring her

574
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:05.079
expertise to your organization. She will
help ignite meaningful development within your workforce that

575
00:40:05.079 --> 00:40:09.079
will increase employee engagement, performance and
retention. To learn more or to invite

576
00:40:09.079 --> 00:40:14.760
a lease to speak to your organization, please visit her at www dot Elise

577
00:40:14.880 --> 00:40:19.960
Cortez dot com. She would welcome
the opportunity to help get your employees working

578
00:40:20.119 --> 00:40:24.119
on purpose. We're making it easier
to listen to the Voice American Talk Radio

579
00:40:24.159 --> 00:40:28.920
Network wherever you go. In addition
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580
00:40:28.920 --> 00:40:32.280
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00:40:32.280 --> 00:40:37.639
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582
00:40:37.960 --> 00:40:42.400
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583
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584
00:40:45.800 --> 00:41:02.199
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00:41:02.400 --> 00:41:08.079
encouraged and connected on our Lively Award
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586
00:41:08.280 --> 00:41:14.800
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587
00:41:14.800 --> 00:41:19.239
four pm Pacific on the Voice America
Empowerment Channel. Tune into the Power Party

588
00:41:19.280 --> 00:41:23.039
for positive, uplifting, life changing
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589
00:41:23.039 --> 00:41:40.000
com. You lagged follow us on
Twitter for more great ideas at Voice America

590
00:41:40.079 --> 00:41:53.320
Empowerment. This is Working on Purpose
with Elise Cortez. To reach our program

591
00:41:53.360 --> 00:41:58.800
today, please call into one triple
eight three four six nine one four one.

592
00:41:59.159 --> 00:42:01.960
Again, that's one triple eight three
four six nine one four one.

593
00:42:02.360 --> 00:42:08.920
You may also send an email to
Elise ali se at Elise Cortez dot com.

594
00:42:09.599 --> 00:42:20.000
Now back to Working on Purpose.
Thanks for staying with us, and

595
00:42:20.079 --> 00:42:22.079
welcome back to Working on Purpose.
If you're just tuning in. My guest

596
00:42:22.159 --> 00:42:27.320
is Diane McClay, who was a
certified professional Whole person coach who helps midlife

597
00:42:27.360 --> 00:42:30.960
professionals navigate career transitions through choice and
courage to make meaningful change. I'm your

598
00:42:31.000 --> 00:42:35.079
host, Elise Cortez. So before
the break, Diane, you were just

599
00:42:35.199 --> 00:42:37.480
finishing your fifth concept on be Resilient. I just wanted to say a couple

600
00:42:37.519 --> 00:42:42.880
of things about that really quick even
just this morning, I was thinking about

601
00:42:42.920 --> 00:42:45.119
all the balls that I have juggling
right now, and I'm thinking to myself,

602
00:42:45.199 --> 00:42:47.280
I only have twenty four hours in
a day, and I need thirty

603
00:42:47.320 --> 00:42:51.679
six. And then I went to
what my mom used to always say.

604
00:42:51.679 --> 00:42:52.440
And I won't say it the way
that she did because we're going to be

605
00:42:52.480 --> 00:42:55.880
on air and there is a dirty
word in there, but she used to

606
00:42:55.960 --> 00:43:00.440
say, you know, some portm
has it worse than you. Some other

607
00:43:00.519 --> 00:43:02.360
you know, poor person has it
worse than you. And I always try

608
00:43:02.400 --> 00:43:07.159
to think about that that it is
amazing what a human being can actually do,

609
00:43:07.400 --> 00:43:13.079
and especially when you consider the spirit
that's under that that actually fuels it.

610
00:43:13.360 --> 00:43:15.679
It is truly remarkable what a human
can do. And I really would

611
00:43:15.760 --> 00:43:20.440
like our listeners to make sure that
you you catch that that, yeah,

612
00:43:20.480 --> 00:43:23.840
it's going to be tough no matter
what, but the resiliency cannot be underestimated.

613
00:43:25.000 --> 00:43:28.280
And thanks for pointing that out.
You know, I've I've heard a

614
00:43:28.320 --> 00:43:31.519
similar a similar quote where someone said, there's somebody who has less than you

615
00:43:31.719 --> 00:43:37.320
that is very happy with what they
have. So that that kind of keeps

616
00:43:37.360 --> 00:43:39.840
me going every day to remind myself, you know, it's everybody's loss and

617
00:43:39.960 --> 00:43:45.599
resilience is different, but everybody hits
a rock bottom, and the sense of

618
00:43:45.719 --> 00:43:49.079
rock bottom and a sense of recovery
from that and the sense of climbing out

619
00:43:49.119 --> 00:43:53.599
of that and becoming better through that
is universal, I believe, regardless of

620
00:43:53.679 --> 00:43:58.599
what the situation is, Yes,
and to allow ourselves to be open to

621
00:43:58.880 --> 00:44:05.920
and to be transformed by that difficulty, challenge, pain, whatever it is,

622
00:44:06.960 --> 00:44:12.199
that's how people will become even more
magnificent human beings. Indeed. Yeah,

623
00:44:12.519 --> 00:44:15.760
yeah, okay, So for this
next section here, this next segment

624
00:44:15.840 --> 00:44:19.480
here, I want to talk about
how we actually met, which is you've

625
00:44:19.480 --> 00:44:23.039
reached out to me for related to
the Unleashed Your Dream Career online interview series,

626
00:44:23.119 --> 00:44:28.119
and you featured more than twenty renowned
experts who help in life career professionals

627
00:44:28.239 --> 00:44:30.719
create and sustain more meaningful and purpose, more meaning and purpose in the second

628
00:44:30.719 --> 00:44:35.559
half of their lives. I thought
that was tremendous. I was thrilled to

629
00:44:35.639 --> 00:44:38.400
participate. Thank you again for having
me for our listeners. How did you

630
00:44:38.480 --> 00:44:42.960
get the idea to do that and
how how did you go about organizing that

631
00:44:43.119 --> 00:44:45.920
effort because I know it wasn't easy. Well, thank you for that and

632
00:44:46.000 --> 00:44:51.199
again, thank you just for your
contribution and bringing the awareness about identities at

633
00:44:51.239 --> 00:44:54.599
work. That's what really captured me
and connected me to you. I'm part

634
00:44:54.639 --> 00:44:59.800
of the part of the business mastermind
that I'm using to grow my business and

635
00:45:00.119 --> 00:45:05.039
to create a new network of people. Talks about creating. You know,

636
00:45:05.119 --> 00:45:08.000
I spent twenty two years in government
where that was a closed network system,

637
00:45:08.400 --> 00:45:14.199
and now I'm trying to be a
successful entrepreneur in a business that people don't

638
00:45:14.239 --> 00:45:17.039
know who I am. So one
way to do that is it's like moving

639
00:45:17.079 --> 00:45:21.719
into a new neighborhood and introducing yourself
to the neighbors, the experts, the

640
00:45:21.800 --> 00:45:24.800
speakers, the people who are out
there who've been doing the work like what

641
00:45:24.880 --> 00:45:29.800
you're doing with work on purpose,
and connect yourself to them. And then

642
00:45:29.880 --> 00:45:34.920
the second part is that there's a
lot to be learned by putting twenty five

643
00:45:34.960 --> 00:45:37.320
people into a room or twenty people
in the room. There's a saying that

644
00:45:37.400 --> 00:45:42.039
I used to teach with that said, none of us is as smart as

645
00:45:42.199 --> 00:45:45.320
all of us, and I really
truly believe that when we can align ourselves

646
00:45:45.400 --> 00:45:52.039
with people that have similar messages to
us, similar energy space, similar goals

647
00:45:52.079 --> 00:45:54.800
and visions, for what they want
to contribute to the world. We can

648
00:45:54.880 --> 00:45:59.800
move mountains. So that was the
second part, and then the third part

649
00:46:00.119 --> 00:46:05.000
is to be able to start creating
a brand for myself and start putting myself

650
00:46:05.079 --> 00:46:07.360
out there as being somebody that people
can call and they can connect with.

651
00:46:07.480 --> 00:46:13.360
About working through career change, Well, I was really impressed. I am

652
00:46:13.440 --> 00:46:17.840
with how incredibly well organized you were
in that effort, just all the way

653
00:46:17.920 --> 00:46:21.840
through, from the beginning of how
you reached out to introduce yourself to me,

654
00:46:22.400 --> 00:46:27.519
how you conducted the conversation, how
you evangelized it using technology, and

655
00:46:27.920 --> 00:46:31.360
even how you presence yourself. Really
it's really impressive. Well, thank you,

656
00:46:31.480 --> 00:46:37.440
And I have good coaches. I'm
working through hardcore business with Shanda Sumter,

657
00:46:37.679 --> 00:46:42.519
and she's been doing this a long
time, but she has a lot

658
00:46:42.559 --> 00:46:45.920
of great messages about really, if
you have a passion and you have a

659
00:46:45.000 --> 00:46:49.199
message to put into the world,
there's a way. There's room enough in

660
00:46:49.280 --> 00:46:52.920
the world for everybody to do that. If you think of the billions of

661
00:46:52.960 --> 00:46:55.400
people we have, how many life
coaches we have, how many radio shows

662
00:46:55.440 --> 00:47:00.840
there are, there's a slice for
everybody. And if we function with the

663
00:47:00.960 --> 00:47:05.360
capacity that a I have a right
to be there, and I can be

664
00:47:05.519 --> 00:47:09.039
there, and I'm qualified to be
there. But then that it's not a

665
00:47:09.119 --> 00:47:13.079
competition. You know, if you
and I were both coaches in the same

666
00:47:13.199 --> 00:47:16.440
town, if you got a client
that I didn't, i'd be happy for

667
00:47:16.559 --> 00:47:21.960
you, because it's about getting the
information into the hands of the people so

668
00:47:22.119 --> 00:47:24.760
that they can make the change and
the choices in their life to really truly

669
00:47:24.840 --> 00:47:30.199
be happy individuals and contribute to themselves, their network, and their society in

670
00:47:30.280 --> 00:47:34.599
a bigger, broader kind of way. So when you look at it from

671
00:47:34.639 --> 00:47:38.480
a non competitive standpoint and you say, hey, there's room for everybody to

672
00:47:38.639 --> 00:47:43.679
do their specialty and to do their
passion and to make money at it,

673
00:47:44.599 --> 00:47:49.239
that changes how you can start functioning
in the world. You start looking for

674
00:47:49.360 --> 00:47:53.719
collaboration rather than competition. Two things
to that, Diane, if I may,

675
00:47:53.880 --> 00:47:58.199
One is the notion of abundance.
Right, just what you're what I

676
00:47:58.280 --> 00:48:02.840
think you're also presencing is that the
abundance mentality versus the competitive and there's a

677
00:48:02.920 --> 00:48:07.519
single piet to pull from mentality.
So I appreciate that tremendously. And then

678
00:48:07.639 --> 00:48:12.480
the second thing that I really want
to say is that I really think that

679
00:48:12.559 --> 00:48:15.559
if you really are, if you
want to be up to something in life,

680
00:48:15.599 --> 00:48:19.440
and certainly if you need some help
navigating a difficult situation. I really

681
00:48:19.599 --> 00:48:22.599
think it's useful to work with someone
else. In your case, you've got

682
00:48:22.679 --> 00:48:24.800
a coach or maybe a couple.
I have two coaches as well, And

683
00:48:25.639 --> 00:48:30.800
you know, I think that it's
hard to uncover and become all we can

684
00:48:30.880 --> 00:48:34.960
be just on our own perspective,
on our own path. We need help

685
00:48:35.960 --> 00:48:38.440
well, and I think you're doing
yourself a disservice if you try again.

686
00:48:38.519 --> 00:48:43.559
Earlier in the show, I'd mentioned
that I for a long time I carried

687
00:48:43.599 --> 00:48:49.000
the story that asking for help was
a weakness. And what I now realize,

688
00:48:49.079 --> 00:48:52.719
because I've been vulnerable and because I
needed help, I now realize that

689
00:48:52.880 --> 00:48:58.000
it's not only not a weakness,
it's a strength well when you ask for

690
00:48:58.159 --> 00:49:00.960
help, and then when you ask
for specif if it asks, like when

691
00:49:00.000 --> 00:49:05.719
I ask you to be on the
show, you are allowing someone else to

692
00:49:05.880 --> 00:49:09.440
step into their passion or to step
into their purpose. By asking for the

693
00:49:09.559 --> 00:49:15.440
help, you are allowing someone else
to hold their light up so that you

694
00:49:15.559 --> 00:49:19.960
can be drawn to it and you
can see what they have to offer.

695
00:49:20.400 --> 00:49:22.400
So when you change it from a
selfish you know, from don't make it

696
00:49:22.480 --> 00:49:25.960
a selfish thing. If you don't
ask for help, you're being selfish.

697
00:49:27.280 --> 00:49:30.599
If you do ask for help,
you are offering someone else the opportunity to

698
00:49:30.719 --> 00:49:37.119
step into their greatness. And how
beautiful is that. Next week we will

699
00:49:37.199 --> 00:49:39.519
have David Perks on the on the
on air. He and I just pre

700
00:49:39.599 --> 00:49:44.119
recorded this show because he's he is
in Sydney, Australia, and he was

701
00:49:44.199 --> 00:49:47.440
talking about the whole ripple effect,
Diane of you know, when you do

702
00:49:47.679 --> 00:49:51.559
something, when you even call it
and recognize someone, what you're doing is

703
00:49:51.599 --> 00:49:54.800
you're strugging a little ripple or butterfly
effect. And how what a difference that

704
00:49:54.880 --> 00:49:59.119
can make. And I completely agree
with both of you on that front.

705
00:49:59.719 --> 00:50:01.480
Well, and I think it's for
me personally, it's more rewarding. I

706
00:50:01.719 --> 00:50:06.480
love and going back to things as
a kid. I love standing on the

707
00:50:06.639 --> 00:50:08.639
edge of a pond and picking up
a rock and skipping it and seeing how

708
00:50:08.800 --> 00:50:13.360
far I could make it go or
how many ripples I could make. And

709
00:50:13.480 --> 00:50:15.679
if I go back to if I
invite your listeners to go back to something

710
00:50:15.760 --> 00:50:20.639
that they used to do as a
kid that gave them pure joy. Then

711
00:50:21.360 --> 00:50:23.800
coaching in this way and collaborating with
people like you on radio shows like this

712
00:50:24.519 --> 00:50:29.360
is exactly the same thing as being
five and skipping a rock on the pond.

713
00:50:29.679 --> 00:50:35.400
It's just a broader scale. I
agree. I agree. Well,

714
00:50:36.079 --> 00:50:38.039
we're coming close to the end of
the show already here, but if you

715
00:50:38.119 --> 00:50:42.559
can, just because some people don't
understand what coaching means, and some people

716
00:50:42.639 --> 00:50:45.800
have a negative connotation with coaching.
They think it means you're doing something bad

717
00:50:45.840 --> 00:50:51.079
at work, so you need to
be coached. That mentality still exists for

718
00:50:51.159 --> 00:50:53.280
some people. So can you talk
a little bit about your own coaching and

719
00:50:53.320 --> 00:50:57.199
maybe give us an example or two
without giving away, of course, the

720
00:50:57.280 --> 00:51:00.840
identity of your client of maybe someone
that you've helped that you're particularly proud of.

721
00:51:00.679 --> 00:51:05.480
Sure, and just real quick to
say that coaching is about giving all

722
00:51:05.559 --> 00:51:08.239
the power to the client and asking
the client what is important to them.

723
00:51:08.800 --> 00:51:12.760
And then the coach is the one
who holds up the mirror in a non

724
00:51:12.880 --> 00:51:15.360
judgmental space and says, here's what
I see, here's what I hear.

725
00:51:15.760 --> 00:51:19.960
How can I help you pick between
these two things? And how can I

726
00:51:20.039 --> 00:51:22.559
help you align your values to your
belief systems? So that you feel whole

727
00:51:22.760 --> 00:51:28.360
in whatever it is that you're doing. Folks that I have helped have wanted

728
00:51:28.400 --> 00:51:30.679
to Some of them have been unemployed
and they've been trying to figure out how

729
00:51:30.719 --> 00:51:35.400
do they get back into the job
market. A couple of people have been

730
00:51:35.480 --> 00:51:38.760
trying to cut loose of a job
that doesn't serve them, and they really

731
00:51:38.880 --> 00:51:44.000
want to find their passion, but
they have some fear holding them back about

732
00:51:44.639 --> 00:51:49.320
giving up a paycheck or stepping into
success. And so the work that we

733
00:51:49.480 --> 00:51:54.400
do is really it almost always comes
down to belief systems and stories and how

734
00:51:54.519 --> 00:52:00.639
we can, as we talked about
earlier, bring new ways and new perspectives

735
00:52:00.840 --> 00:52:04.679
to bring out all of the aspects
of who we are as a whole person.

736
00:52:05.559 --> 00:52:07.880
I've learned to think with my heart
and not just my head, and

737
00:52:08.039 --> 00:52:14.280
that's thanks to my coach. So
it's combining everything about what makes you you

738
00:52:15.079 --> 00:52:19.280
and putting that in front of you
so that you can realize the resources and

739
00:52:19.400 --> 00:52:22.960
skills that you already have inside you
and you can make the choice to move

740
00:52:23.039 --> 00:52:28.920
forward and do something that serves you
better. Yeah, and for me,

741
00:52:29.079 --> 00:52:31.559
I can say that the coaches that
I've worked with, especially Sean Anderson.

742
00:52:31.679 --> 00:52:38.480
He really helps what he does for
me as he holds me accountable to my

743
00:52:38.760 --> 00:52:43.119
dreams, my goals, and he
just won't give up on me. He

744
00:52:43.280 --> 00:52:45.760
just won't give up on me.
And he reminds me. Look, Cortes,

745
00:52:45.920 --> 00:52:47.599
you know you said you want to
do do X. What have you

746
00:52:47.719 --> 00:52:52.239
done to move the needle to get
to X? And I find that incredibly

747
00:52:52.360 --> 00:52:54.679
useful for me for what I'm up
to in life. And so there's lots

748
00:52:54.719 --> 00:52:58.360
of ways to get coaching, and
I just like to make sure that our

749
00:52:58.639 --> 00:53:04.480
listeners understand that as well. And
there's different different different perspectives, different mentalities.

750
00:53:04.880 --> 00:53:08.000
I agree with you that mentality and
stories have a lot to do with

751
00:53:08.800 --> 00:53:12.719
us being able to be freed up
to go after what we want and get

752
00:53:12.800 --> 00:53:15.679
what we want when we can get
access to those things to change. And

753
00:53:15.719 --> 00:53:17.280
I think the better getting out of
your own way? Really, Yes,

754
00:53:17.599 --> 00:53:21.559
oh gosh, yes, we all
need help doing that. We sure do,

755
00:53:22.000 --> 00:53:24.239
sure do. And so we've got
a little bit of time left.

756
00:53:24.840 --> 00:53:30.159
Is there one particular person from your
Unleash your Dream Career online interview series that

757
00:53:30.320 --> 00:53:35.559
you that you that you really resonated
with. Gosh, you know this particular

758
00:53:35.719 --> 00:53:38.400
round I feel like I got lit
up by all twenty experts that I had.

759
00:53:40.599 --> 00:53:45.239
It would take too long to name
them all. Peter Fritz from Midlife

760
00:53:45.280 --> 00:53:50.880
Tribe down in Australia. He specifically
served midlife people who have who are trying

761
00:53:50.880 --> 00:53:54.440
to rearrange the lives and have more
happiness. Paula Morand is my publishers.

762
00:53:54.480 --> 00:53:58.639
She's the one who inspired me to
write Dreaming Big, being bold and invited

763
00:53:58.679 --> 00:54:01.239
me to that opportunity. You,
of course, with your identity work.

764
00:54:02.239 --> 00:54:09.039
Sharon Sailor talked about body body language. Mary Shorres talked about conscious communications.

765
00:54:09.320 --> 00:54:12.679
Yeah, I know, Mary Shores, how we can change that? That

766
00:54:12.840 --> 00:54:15.599
was really powerful. I will tell
you that I feel like I got every

767
00:54:15.719 --> 00:54:21.880
interview, I got lit up by
somebody different with a different viewpoint than perspective

768
00:54:21.920 --> 00:54:25.760
about how we can change, change
how we function our lives to be literally

769
00:54:25.840 --> 00:54:30.519
the best version of ourselves. Every
minute great and great way to finish.

770
00:54:30.559 --> 00:54:32.679
We are out of time. Diane, you are a treasure. I'm so

771
00:54:32.880 --> 00:54:37.039
glad we'd cross paths. Appreciate knowing
you Listeners, if you want to get

772
00:54:37.079 --> 00:54:40.039
ahold of Diane and just inquire as
to how she might work with you.

773
00:54:40.119 --> 00:54:44.639
I really encourage you to find her
Diane really quick? How can they find

774
00:54:44.679 --> 00:54:49.519
you on Twitter or via email?
Twitter at Coach with Diane, d an

775
00:54:49.559 --> 00:54:55.400
e Instagram, Coach with Diane Email
is coach with Diane at Diane McClay dot

776
00:54:55.480 --> 00:55:00.280
com and that's d I A n
E. Mc c ay dot com.

777
00:55:00.880 --> 00:55:05.360
Great, Thank you and join us
next week when we talk with David Perks

778
00:55:05.440 --> 00:55:08.800
to pay compliment about how ongoing feedback
can motivate employees and develop their careers around

779
00:55:08.800 --> 00:55:12.960
more meaningful work. See you then, Remember that work is at least one

780
00:55:13.000 --> 00:55:22.800
third of our lives, so let's
work on purpose. We hope you've enjoyed

781
00:55:22.880 --> 00:55:27.039
this week's program. Be sure to
tune into Working on Purpose featuring your host,

782
00:55:27.159 --> 00:55:31.039
Alice Cortez, every Wednesday at six
pm Eastern Time three pm Pacific Time

783
00:55:31.119 --> 00:55:37.000
on the Voice America Empowerment Channel.
This week, find your life's purpose at work