A Dream Reclaimed by a Transformed Life

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There are some people that make their
work just another thing they have to do,

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and there are those that make their
work something that they want to do.

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Welcome to Working on Purpose with your
host Elise Cortez. In our program,

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we provide guidance and inspiration from those
people who have found deeper meaning and

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personal connection to their work life.
It's beyond nine to five. It's working

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on Purpose. Now Here is your
host, Elise Cortez. Welcome back to

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your Working on Purpose show. Thank
you tuning in again this week. I'm

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your host, Elise Cortez. Join
you live from Dallas, which is home

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base for me. If you've been
tuning in for a while, you know

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this program is all about helping people
create more meaningful and purposeful lives and equipping

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leaders inside organizations to make work a
rich and compelling part of life so employees

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thrive, give their best performance,
and want to stay. I talk with

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my guests to draw on their expertise
and share my own experience consulting speaking in

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developing workforces across the globe. Each
week. In these conversations, I hope

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you'll walk away with something you can
immediately put to use. And if I

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can do anything to help you along
your journey. Go to my website at

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a lease Cortez dot com and use
the contact me feature to message me.

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Let's open a conversation and explore what's
going on for you and how I might

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be able to help. Whether you
want to learn how they're vitally inspired,

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living and leading from purpose, leadership
program or consultant can help you develop you

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and your team's efficacy in motivating your
people to give their best while creating a

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meaning infused culture in your organization.
You want to see about joining a catch

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fire online community to stoke your own
passion, inspiration or purpose discovery, or

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provide this as a gift and benefit
for your team, or you'd like me

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to speak for your company or conference
fetting You're rate, I'm glad, we're

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connected, and thanks for listening.
Now on to this week's program with us

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Today is not a Lete Lafonte LaFond
de Sis. She is the newly minted

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author of Lujozo Pendant Etoire du Moulau's
Operation or the Bending Read the story of

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a marvelous operation and a motivational and
techech speaker. Her tremendous strength and resilience

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ushered her through her decades of pain
as her schooliosis progressed to where she could

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no longer avoid what would be a
botched surgery that entirely altered the course of

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her previous life and a high flying
corporate career. We'll be talking today about

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her early life and career that shaped
her, her battle with schooliosis, and

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the operation that would ultimately alter her
entire life, and how she transformed herself

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into the writer and speaker she is
today. She noted today from Paris,

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France, not let Beyonveneu. Welcome
to working on Purpose. Thank you Eli

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sent first to really all my gratitude
for welcoming me. It's a really great

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opportunity to be there, to be
back in the in the US with you

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in English. Sorry for the accent, as guess I'm French, yes,

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And it's a pleasure to be to
have all your listener listening to my story.

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You're so very welcome and I'm it
is as I say I told you

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before we got on air. It's
a privilege to be in your life now

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and be part of your world.
And I want to remind you listeners who

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are speaking or hearing hearing us today
that another lett is speaking in English,

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which is a second language for her. She speaks to others as well,

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so keep that in mind as we
talk. Be easy on her that she's

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generating beautifully as she speaks. So
when we for this first part of the

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conversation, not a let I wanted
to talk about you. I wanted to

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help our listeners just really understand who
you are, how you're reared, and

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some of that early corporate career that
you had that shaped you into who you

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are. So, among other passions, for me, let my listeners know

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that I'm an identity and meaning researcher. So let's start by talking about just

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really who you are. And there's
a lot that makes you you. So

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if you were to share the key
aspects of yourself to someone who doesn't know

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you at all, what would you
say? How would you describe yourself?

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I think we all agree on the
fact that I don't teach changes with it

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and level of self understanding. So
we are not one we are meanings.

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And therefore what I should say for
sure is today I'm French, I'm sixty

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five, I'm a woman, I'm
a mother, for sure, Because that's

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the sort of things when it's starts
in life. It's never hands. And

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also I am the type of person
as a friend you can trust, and

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that's something which is very important to
my life as a key point all over.

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But also I am and I'm still, I'm still, I'm still.

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But I was a very ambitious woman, dedicated to self insurance in order to

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take care about herself because others were
not that good to take care and really

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aiming at financial and social stability and
career as so many other identities for instance,

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for instance, I've been I'm still
a particle. I love to a

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party, I love to social life, love people, and that's very also

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important. But since the past years, since the five past is the last

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five years, I'm reborn. I'm
reborn thanks to terf accident which happened to

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me as a writer, as a
motivational speaker, and I hoped as a

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better person and also to myself.
There's a lot there and there's so much

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we can learn from you, and
there is very much you can draw from

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to motivate and inspire others. So
and I have senior ted talk. It

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is marvelous, not to be no
pun intended, marvelous. You're welcome.

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So you describe in your book about
growing up in a wealthy home but one

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that lacked love and care and where
you were psychologically neglected. And you say

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in that realing you developed, as
we all do in childhood, some beliefs

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that helped you survive and would later
make you very successful. Tell us a

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little bit about your upbringing and what
were those co operating beliefs were, What

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were those that really became your guide. Indeed, my family was, well,

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see it's not are different from an
American family, family which could be

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worthy, but not caring for a
child that can happen all over the world,

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and for them, the child was
just an element of the I would

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call social package. And by no
means, no means at all, would

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need anything else but to be fed
and grow, no education, I would

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see. So I was longing for
love, for ideals, for ideas,

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for sharing belitifs, for anything meaningful, alone and very lonely. And at

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one point I realized that I was
my own protector, I would say,

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and I had to create belief on
my own in order to protect me better

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and to avoid to be be treated. And then part of that feeling that

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the beliefs which were very important and
who saved my life at that at that

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age, when I was a teenager
for instance, and a bit later on,

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is that nobody could hurt me,
that I feel no pen, that

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I had no feeling no risk.
And then after I transformed those believes as

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I was growing into life in two
I am a sort of wonder woman.

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I'm able of anything. I can't
do any anything, I can deliver anything,

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I can juggle with many lives,
and nothing will prevent me to do

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what I want. So that's that
sort of belief which create, which create

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my life, of my survival when
I was young, And I wanted you

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to talk about that not a let
because it is so important that we as

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individuals get present to and understand those
core early beliefs that we adopted in order

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to survive as children, because oftentimes
they do make us very successful in adulthood,

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but often come at some major expense, just as it did for you.

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And it's really important to get present
to that as you did. So

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thank you for sharing that, and
then what I want understand building on it,

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since we do say that those beliefs
can often be what helps us become

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successful, talk with us a little
bit about how those early beliefs served you

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in the world of the corporate space
and how you navigated that into success.

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Yes, and come back to me
to the nineteen eighties, which were these

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years of very bright but very money
oriented, very oriented to a fierce competition

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in business life. So it was
not an easy period in the economy and

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the social life, especially for a
woman, because we were many on the

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work market but not that appreciated.
That means that we had to fight with

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men for somehow getting the right level, the right pear rise, the right

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of responsibility, and so on and
so forth. So believe such those I

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had, which is no one can
hurt me, I can have it all,

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I can care for myself. I
have no pain and no fear at

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me. A world wehold, for
instance, to be frank would I was

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mainly working in big corporation and in
or in pr communication agencies, which are

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not a world of awfully nice people. Somehow, So in that world where

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the competition was fierce, where there
was let's talk frankly sexual husband for young

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women, where there was a lot
of difficulties, and where I was sometimes

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devastated underwork quessure, it wasn't as
set to be with this sort of beliefs.

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Secondly, I was in that world
from twenty five to four key and

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at that time he telled me also
not to pay too much attention to myself

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and especially to my health and my
body. And it allowed me to deliver

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to work and to succeed because I
was able to work sixteen hours a day

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to deliver before my used to ask
for something to do some three hundred and

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sixty degrees worked in order to be
sure that I've covered everything. So I

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was more than performing. I was
over performing, and that's why I've been

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successful, which is not undervised.
I would give anyone to follow. But

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at the same time, I was
a sort of I would say a minute,

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I mean at all, you remember
the film read Less Scott. I

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was a sort of a robot,
not very I would say, not very

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nice to myself and to the other
sometimes. And that explained also why I

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was not that at happy even if
I was that successful. Yes, not

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unless I wanted to make sure that
and you did it beautifully. I wanted

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to make sure that our listeners really
understood just the sheer intensity, the velocity

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at which you lived your life and
worked your rear at the expense of completely

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being blind to your own health.
And I think that's really important that our

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listeners understand that. And I think
you did that there, so so next

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if we can, I want to
make sure our listeners can really understand the

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full transformation that you've gone through.
So we're going to talk more about in

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detail what you're doing today as a
writer and as a speaker, but share

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with us so they understand your the
high level of your corporate career trajectory.

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You have worked for some very large, very very prestigious companies. You know,

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I left him when I was eighteen, and no money Because I left

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him, that was it. So
I paid for my study working as a

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maid as a babysitter, delivering news
spate of the things young people do in

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the US and nothing fancy. And
in my twenties I was sure that something

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was true was true. If I
wanted to succeed in a good job,

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I needed to work really hard,
but I wanted to make money and to

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get to a social position, and
I started in a PR audience in London

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for a while. Then I went
back to a lobby and PR International Film,

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which was located in New York.
In Switzerland, and in Paris where

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I started as a contra executive and
finish as a and as a vice president.

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So at twenty five it was really
early in my life and it was

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because I was working like hell.
I wanted to succeed, and at that

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time one of the many ways to
change salary and to get more responsibive ability

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was to change very often of employers. So I moved and at each time

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it was a challenge from Renauld,
the car company famously known to go to

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those days, because the ex president
left from Japan to leban after a few

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a few mistakes. Then I moved
to Apple. At that time in the

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nineteen eighty four Apple computer was not
a known companist if job had just launched

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it, and it was the time
of the launch of the Making Touch and

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I was in charge of the pr
of the launch of the Making Touch in

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Inflance. Then to mcdoglas donald Glass
Information System, and I was working in

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that time. At that time I
was thirty two thirty four and I would

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had worked so much that when when
I lost my job from my lu Glass

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Information System because the company has some
nonprofit has some financial issues and had to

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to to la layer off some people. I took a sabbatical years for two

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years all over the world too for
the first time recover myself. But it

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was not enough because as soon as
after traveling on my own to Venezuela,

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Alidagentina and Indianapal, when I came
back to the to my home ground and

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to work, I was back in
a wildlife in pr agency. Then I

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was the head of the price relation
for Thompson's TYSF during the war with Iraqi.

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Then I moved to IBM, where
I've have great job at international level

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for twenty years. And this mechanic
discomfort zone of being delivering, about being

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a top performer, about growing within
the company with new jobs, new responsibility,

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new new type of areas, learning
all the time. It was fascinating,

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but it was not. It was
it was just satisfying my ambition,

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my social mindset. But part of
me was dead inside. I can absolutely

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I'm very present to that as you, as I read your book and watched

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your TI talk, I am very
present to that. And that's exactly what

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I want, a presence for our
listeners on the basis of you being dead

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inside. We're going to talk after
the break about what started your transformation.

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But that's what I wanted to presence
for our listeners is just really the sheer

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velocity at which you lived your life
at the expense of completely being blind to

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your own health and really your own
needs. And so that's where we'll leave

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it for our break. Let's grab
that one. I'm Atlas Cortez, your

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host. We've been on the air
with n Lafon Decease. She's the newly

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minted author of I want to say
it in English, not just French.

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The Bending read the story of a
marvelous operation. And she's a motivational and

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teedech speaker. She noticed today from
Paris, France. We've been talking a

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bit about how she grew up and
really what birthed her into becoming the very

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successful person she has become and is. After the break, we're going to

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hear about the operation and the transformation
that set her onto a new path.

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Stay with us, we'll be right
back. Elise Cortez is a speaker and

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engagement and development catalyst. She designs
and delivers professional development, leadership and engagement

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workshops and can bring her expertise to
your organization. She will help ignite meaningful

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development within your workforce that will increase
employee engagement, performance and retention. To

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learn more or to invite Elise to
speak to your organization, please visit her

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at www dot Elise Cortez dot com. She would welcome the opportunity to help

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get your employees working on purpose.
This is working on Purpose with Elise Cortez.

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To reach our program today, send
an email to Elise Ali at Elise

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Cortez dot com. Now back to
working on purpose. Thanks for staying with

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us, and welcome back to working
on purpose. If you're just joining us,

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My guest is not at La Fonde
Sis. She's a newly minted author

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of The Bending Read, the story
of a marvelous operation, and a motivational

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and tetech speaker. Her tremendous grit
and resilience allowed her to entirely transform herself

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from a very successful corporate executive to
the writer and speaker she is today.

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She joins us to day from Paris, France. I'm your host, Leice

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Cortez, so not Alette and listeners. In the work I do helping other

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people reach their next desired level of
development or transformation, it's often necessary to

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create or leverage some kind of a
motivating catalyst in their lives to produce the

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change we're looking for. So you
had such a catalyst delivered straight to you

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in the form of that botched spine
surgery in October twenty fourteen. So first,

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not alet, can you tell us
how your bodily find your body finally

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began to become the authority in your
life prompted your operation in the first place.

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A schooliers. This is not something
very worrying when when you are young,

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and usually it can be treated and
most quite I would say one third

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of the people on earth have a
little schooliosis, so it's not something fancy.

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But in my family, as I
said, which was a bit toxic

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and not very caring, nobody took
care how the child I was. And

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then after going through the corporate ladder
with much energy, I perhaps it was

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absolutely unpossible for me to stop and
to pay attention to myself and to recognize

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that I had a major health problem
which need to be treated. So after

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being a mother, after some mormonal
shock with the maternity, minoposis and everything,

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this spinal spinal curve which was twenty
degree, as everybody I would say,

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when I was twenty thirty and so
long I'd become a double spinal curve

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of seventy three degrees. That's been
the next step for me was to be

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like the old ladies. We go
looking to the to the pavement because they

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can't when they walk look look other
to the origin because they are bending so

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much. While the title of my
book the Bending read And then I was

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tobbed because I was suffering. I
couldn't work anymore. I was in pain.

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I could not deliver as much as
I could as I was I was

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doing before in my work. I
was most of the time working happily enough

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online virtually so I could walk from
my bed and so on and so forth

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with My life was a nightmare,
I would say, free or four years

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before the surgery, and at one
point they see there is no other way

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unique towards this surgery, which is
wild. They put two tight on tan

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sticks to your to my spine from
my neck to the bottom of of my

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body, and then they unlock the
spine. They put it right we and

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they school it like like you would
do with a sailing boat or something like

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that. And it's a ten hours
operation and it's really something I know,

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and I knew it was something difficult
and painful and somehow not dangerous but quite

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strong. But the surgeon was telling
me it would be much better than before,

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and you won't be very mobile on
the top of your body, but

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you have good legs and it would
be okay. And I was in my

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mind saying, well, I will
look like Madonna with the course, but

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it's fine. Then I had no
chance then to decide, even if I

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was deeply frightened, to say yes
to that surgery, because otherwise it was

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any how. And that's why i'd
I take the full responsibility of what happened

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to my life before and then and
now, because the one who is guilty

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is if someone is guilty to bring
my body to that state, it's me

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yes. And I really appreciate that
you you accept that responsibility and see it

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that way, in part because I
see that as an empowering stance. I

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would want you to take that responsibility. So so now next for our listeners,

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you go through with the surgery,
and when you wake up the next

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day from that surgery, tell us
what happened, tell us what you learned,

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tell us what you saw there at
the foot of your bed. In

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fact, instead of being in a
nice bed in a nice room in an

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hospital, I was still in the
urgency whom which was not what was planned.

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And there was this huge code of
French doctors, all very sexty,

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I swear, but not really nice
to see them, because they didn't look

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very smile. And they say,
well, madam, you know your surgery

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went well, there's still a little
problem. Your spine has been damaged at

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the nerves level. Your your legs
are dead. You can't feel them and

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they can't move, and you won't
work again. And I was. I

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stayed at them. I couldn't believe
it. It was not rising to my

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brain and I could not believe.
I could not believe that something like that

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had happened to me. But at
the same time I could not believe,

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but I knew the realities. I
knew that my life had changed forever.

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I knew that I was understood very
clearly in my mind that I was before

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and an actor of my life life, and now I was becoming a spectator.

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And before I was free, and
then now I've lost some autonomies and

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from aperhappective woman, I was now
static inner bed, with access only to

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what my aunts could reach. That
means the table on my over my knees

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in the bed, eventually a phone, but nothing else. That freedom was

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over. And then little by little
I understood that I was not in that

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hospital for three weeks, that it
was planned, but for nine or one

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year, or nine months or one
year. And that was the end of

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my life as a business executive in
IBM, my life as a mother,

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my life as a lover, my
life as a wife, my life as

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a friend, my life as a
passionate about a woman for a network.

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That everything which has constituted my life
was over. I was in that bed

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with no movement and no action.
To the time that I was we would

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be able to find either a full
or partial solution. So I was.

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I was in that mood and not
terribly comfortable, and I would see,

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oh, not a let. So
I want to make sure that the listeners

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really understood what you said. There. You said a lot, but I

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want to I want to just really
focus on this phrase. Going from an

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actor in your life to a spectator, that is just astounding, especially for

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someone as ferocious as you. So
now if you would help us understand a

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little bit about that journey, I
know we don't have a lot of time

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to really talk through the details,
but give us some insight into what it

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was like to navigate that long journey
of recovery. I know it was so

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painful. You talk in the book
about working through the pain and and and

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vomiting through the pain, because it's
just brought you to almost literally to your

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knees alpost. Understand a bit about
what was it like physically. First,

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I stayed for weeks in bed and
nothing could happen. I wasn't even not

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able to read or to write.
I was only with my phone. There

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was no internet in the hospitals thanks
to the French organization, and I was

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lost. And I had nothing else
to do than to think about my life,

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to think what I did right,
what I should change, and to

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meditate. Thanks to the patrol power, they are good. There are good

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programs which are free will help me
a lot. Then after the next stage,

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was ready to move from that bed, to be moved from that bed

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to another type of table in rehability
station, which should verticalize me because at

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one point for the body, if
you lay too much on in a bed,

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you need to be verticalized. And
it's very slow. You go sometimatters

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by something matters because you are thinking
your body can stand it, and you're

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suffering the hell. So it took
me long weeks like that, and at

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one point I was able to stand
nearly vertical with some ropes taking me on

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that table, not too full,
but vertical. And then it became possible

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to be set on giving myself to
parallel bars and to start to be moved

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my foot started to be moved by
someone to really understand the motion. But

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that took me nearly three three months
before I could stand in the vertical bars.

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And then after with daily exercise,
but not this sort of intensive exercise

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you would drink split all exercise where
people were moving my legs, I was

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even not feeling them, and I
wasn't able to do any anything like you

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do usually when you walk, or
those sort of things. I was moved

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to to work a little a bit
to learn how to extract my legs and

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move from one step to another on
the stair. I was able to use

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latter walking like a toddler, and
I still will still work like a toddler

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today's I'm unable to walk properly.
And then I would say, six months

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after this surgery, I was with
canes and as I am now, that

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means I can't walk any places inside
my house. I can't climb stairs if

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I would play things to walk to
angstby and to make the effort to do

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so. But today, five years
after, I'm still unable to take my

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can and to go outside in the
street to go to the chemistry or to

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go to the coffee shop to have
a coffee on my own. I don't

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have enough balance to do so.
So it's it's challenging, I would say,

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But it is less challenging today than
it was at that time, where

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it was a hell how the whole
place and on the top of it just

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to mention it, because I don't
like to mention it too much because I

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don't want to complain. But the
pain, no logical or miscu law,

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is permanent, and there is nothing
to do be done unless I would agree,

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which I disagree to take pen pen
killers which are destroying who will be

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destroying my mind? No, we
don't know. We don't want to destroy

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that beautiful mind of yours. And
so I just want to acknowledge. I

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want to acknowledge what you've just shared
with us, and I don't even know

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how to get present to what you
the process that you went through to be

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able to at least walk again,
But I wanted to just hold that for

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a second and literally stand in that
place with you. So when we when

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you did leave the hospital and you
came home for the for the first time,

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I return back to your family.
But one of the things that I

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just really struck me so profoundly in
your book and your ten access, you

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discovered something incomprehensible. You discovered that
you, the uber successful, independent superwoman,

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had become a burden to your family. Help us understand what was it

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like that re entry process back to
your family post operation, and what was

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it like for them to have this
altered being among them. But you know,

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there is no good or bad or
good person or bad person. There

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is just a system and the family
is nothing else in a system where people

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00:29:29.640 --> 00:29:33.519
work on the process, where you
have roles, and you played the roles.

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And my role was has been for
twenty years supermo mom in chief,

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and I was doing even more than
they were asking that I wasn't link everything

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for my daughters, for my husbands, or my friends, for a woman

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network for and so on and so
forth, and everybody has has agreed that

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I was playing that hole. And
there was probably some toxicity also for my

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part as from their part, for
me to do it and for them to

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agree that I do it. But
they were very surprised when they discovered that

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I was in a bed, that
I wasn't able to go to the loo,

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to take a shower on my own, to organize their house as I

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00:30:11.839 --> 00:30:18.000
used to be, and to answer
to their needs. And for them there

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were two things. They were full
of empathy and pity for me, but

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also they were suffering the l My
daughters were suffering the l to see their

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mother in such a state. Their
whole model has disappeared to somebody who was

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not complaining a lot, but in
pain and pale and not variable, and

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for them it was too much.
So in fact, in that sort of

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case, you have a very you
experiment. Like all of us mornings.

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That means we got all the stadiums, each of us with his personality or

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personality and their background went to anger. Like me said, nice negotiations eventually

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acceptance. But somehow the three attitudes
possible when you face a major problem in

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life, which are fight, freeze
or run. That was also the case

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00:31:12.400 --> 00:31:17.119
for them, and some of them
decided to freeze, not to see these

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00:31:17.119 --> 00:31:19.640
things. Some of the some of
the run out of me because it was

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unbearable to see me suffree, and
some others stay by the side and fight

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with me. Up to the time
I found an acquil balance and I could

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go back to life. But I
would say none of us are ideal and

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00:31:37.880 --> 00:31:45.759
perfect, and you can't expect for
the people to behave like you would like

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00:31:45.960 --> 00:31:49.000
them to behave. They are what
they are at their age, with their

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00:31:49.039 --> 00:31:53.119
person, their background and so false. So there's nothing good or bad,

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00:31:53.240 --> 00:32:01.880
that's just just it. Yes,
and so I just I appreciate the grace

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00:32:01.960 --> 00:32:05.720
with which you narrated that, and
I want to say a little bit more

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00:32:05.720 --> 00:32:07.000
about that. But let me let's
grab our last break here if we can.

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Natolette, I'm your host, Alice
Cortez. We've been on the air

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00:32:10.079 --> 00:32:15.279
with Natolette LaFond de Sis. She
is the newly minted author of The Bending

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00:32:15.359 --> 00:32:17.799
Read, the story of a marvelous
operation, and she's also a motivational and

391
00:32:17.880 --> 00:32:21.960
techech speaker. She joins us a
day from Paris, France. We've been

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00:32:22.000 --> 00:32:25.279
talking a bit about the operation that
altered her life. After the break,

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00:32:25.319 --> 00:32:29.240
we're going to hear about the dream
that she's living today. Stay with us,

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00:32:29.279 --> 00:32:52.519
We'll be right back. Alice Cortez
is a speaker and engagement and development

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00:32:52.599 --> 00:32:59.279
catalyst. She designs and delivers professional
development, leadership and engagement workshops and can

396
00:32:59.319 --> 00:33:02.920
bring her x ritis to your organization. She will help ignite meaningful development within

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00:33:04.039 --> 00:33:08.039
your workforce that will increase employee engagement, performance and retention. To learn more

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00:33:08.279 --> 00:33:12.720
or to invite e Lease to speak
to your organization, please visit her at

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00:33:12.880 --> 00:33:17.240
www dot Elise Cortez dot com.
She would welcome the opportunity to help get

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your employees working on purpose. This
is working on Purpose with Elise Cortez.

401
00:33:30.240 --> 00:33:35.759
To reach our program today, send
an email to Elise ali Se at Elise

402
00:33:35.880 --> 00:33:43.519
cortez dot com. Now back to
working on purpose. Interesting kiss and welcome

403
00:33:43.559 --> 00:33:45.319
back to working on purpose. If
you're just tuning in, my yes is

404
00:33:45.359 --> 00:33:50.799
not a little fond diss. She's
a new limited author of The Bending Read

405
00:33:51.160 --> 00:33:53.640
the story of a marvelous operation,
and she's a motivational and tech speaker.

406
00:33:54.000 --> 00:33:59.279
Her tremendous script and resilience allowed her
to entirely transform herself from a very successful

407
00:33:59.319 --> 00:34:01.839
corporate executive to the writer and speaker
she is today. I'm your host,

408
00:34:01.920 --> 00:34:06.400
Alice Cortez. I just want to
say from the last fit that we were

409
00:34:06.440 --> 00:34:08.719
talking about Nottallet. I'm wondering,
I don't know that I picked this up

410
00:34:08.800 --> 00:34:13.760
in your TEDx or your Ted talk
or your book. Are you still married?

411
00:34:14.760 --> 00:34:20.519
Yeah, I'm Steve borried. We're
so amazing transformation there as well,

412
00:34:20.599 --> 00:34:24.119
My goodness. Okay, all right, so present day then, I mean

413
00:34:24.280 --> 00:34:29.880
it's talk about, you know,
witnessing a profound transformation or being part of

414
00:34:29.960 --> 00:34:32.760
this. And I also want to
say from for our listeners that Nottolet is

415
00:34:32.800 --> 00:34:37.800
also one of the contributors to the
women's anthology that I'm creating right now,

416
00:34:37.880 --> 00:34:42.559
so she's sharing her story there too. But present day, you are a

417
00:34:42.639 --> 00:34:45.320
writer and a motivational speaker, and
you had a dream at age eighteen to

418
00:34:45.480 --> 00:34:49.280
write and knew you wanted to write
and be an author, but you completely

419
00:34:49.400 --> 00:34:52.239
ignored that, believing that you could
not support yourself as a writer. So

420
00:34:52.440 --> 00:34:55.360
talk with us about that dream.
Where did it come from and how did

421
00:34:55.440 --> 00:35:02.119
you know you were supposed to write
well as as a young, young,

422
00:35:02.440 --> 00:35:06.320
young lady. As I was very
loudly. I used to read a lot,

423
00:35:06.480 --> 00:35:09.320
and I was fascinated by books,
literature and as all that, and

424
00:35:09.880 --> 00:35:15.840
my dream in my in my life
was really at eighteen to become a journalist

425
00:35:15.000 --> 00:35:22.199
and a writer. But I realized
that we could not torture my financial expectation.

426
00:35:22.679 --> 00:35:25.440
Then I gave up and I went
to success. And as I was

427
00:35:25.519 --> 00:35:30.480
working like hell, I had no
time for to listen to my inner voice

428
00:35:30.519 --> 00:35:38.079
and to start writing. And also
probably in myself, I was frightened to

429
00:35:39.159 --> 00:35:44.480
fail as a writer or to succeed, I don't know. But nevertheless,

430
00:35:44.559 --> 00:35:47.360
at one point after my surgery,
at time for a good year, I

431
00:35:47.440 --> 00:35:52.559
had to write some report for expertise, and then I started to write about

432
00:35:52.599 --> 00:35:58.760
this experience at the hospital, the
surgery, the fact that I was handicapped,

433
00:35:58.960 --> 00:36:02.039
and how everybody reactor around me,
the good and the bad and everything.

434
00:36:02.840 --> 00:36:07.920
And I wrote a book without noticing
I was writing a book, and

435
00:36:07.079 --> 00:36:15.119
that one point I put a point
of final and then I say, oh

436
00:36:15.199 --> 00:36:21.880
my god, I am in trouble
because I took about I wrote about many

437
00:36:21.960 --> 00:36:25.559
things, including my family. And
if if it is a book, first

438
00:36:25.599 --> 00:36:30.159
problem, I have to tell them
because they are part of the journey.

439
00:36:30.800 --> 00:36:34.119
And they were certainly outstanding because they
read the book and they say, well,

440
00:36:34.199 --> 00:36:37.079
it's not exactly what we would expect
you to say about us, but

441
00:36:37.280 --> 00:36:42.639
that's fair enough, and you can
go around. And then after I had

442
00:36:42.840 --> 00:36:47.519
some good friends, which are a
very good franchicked intellectual, and I told

443
00:36:47.559 --> 00:36:52.719
I told them that's okay, I'm
sending you a script. If it's just

444
00:36:53.360 --> 00:36:59.480
patoos and no interest, please don't
let me be totally ridiculous and let me

445
00:36:59.599 --> 00:37:02.000
know. And then there was two
days where they were reading the thing and

446
00:37:02.119 --> 00:37:07.880
I was completely worried. I say, well, I'm sure it's absolutely disastered

447
00:37:08.000 --> 00:37:10.400
what I wrote. And then they
came back to meet and me, no,

448
00:37:10.519 --> 00:37:15.480
it's good. Go for for a
publisher. And I went to a

449
00:37:15.599 --> 00:37:20.480
publisher. I found one. And
when the book was published and I saw

450
00:37:20.519 --> 00:37:23.639
it on the shelves at the librarium, I mean, it was like a

451
00:37:23.760 --> 00:37:29.199
force baby. It was absolutely incredible. It was a pleasure. It was

452
00:37:29.320 --> 00:37:34.360
a joy. And then after it
has a reasonable success in fance. But

453
00:37:35.199 --> 00:37:37.679
on the top of that success had
some very specific, very quality that if

454
00:37:37.719 --> 00:37:43.559
she back from readers which thought it
was a sort of INITIATI journey, and

455
00:37:43.639 --> 00:37:47.159
it was important for them to understand
what was the solution in this sort of

456
00:37:50.159 --> 00:37:54.639
of situation which can be a surgery, but which can be a divorce,

457
00:37:54.719 --> 00:38:00.880
which can be unemployment, in which
are universally sort of stories. And then

458
00:38:01.679 --> 00:38:07.559
this incredible feedback was absolutely gifted to
me because I was not expecting to eat

459
00:38:07.639 --> 00:38:16.119
and I felt very stromleisional responsibility throughout
the readers well, so beautiful. A

460
00:38:16.199 --> 00:38:19.320
couple of things that I want to
say on top of that. One that

461
00:38:19.480 --> 00:38:23.079
book came out exactly three years after
your operation, which I think is stunning.

462
00:38:24.039 --> 00:38:28.599
And two I want, yeah,
you're welcome. It's very inspiring.

463
00:38:28.760 --> 00:38:31.039
My book is coming out this year
as well, finally after birthing it for

464
00:38:31.079 --> 00:38:36.480
a bit, so I really appreciate
and applaud your journey and feel a little

465
00:38:36.480 --> 00:38:39.119
bit of the pain that goes along
with it too and creating it. The

466
00:38:39.239 --> 00:38:43.440
thing that I want to talk about
next for our listeners, and this is

467
00:38:43.559 --> 00:38:46.599
so important and you talk you just
mentioned it before, but it's that thing

468
00:38:46.800 --> 00:38:52.519
about hearing that internal voice that kept
trying to get your attention and tell you

469
00:38:52.719 --> 00:38:55.599
that you how you should be living
your life and that you should be directing

470
00:38:55.639 --> 00:38:59.920
your efforts elsewhere, and you kept
shushing it. You kept shushing it.

471
00:39:00.119 --> 00:39:02.159
But over there was a point somewhere, I think in the hospital, you

472
00:39:02.239 --> 00:39:07.360
said, where you finally began to
hear that voice. Tell us about that?

473
00:39:07.440 --> 00:39:08.320
What was that like? And when
did it show? When could you

474
00:39:08.400 --> 00:39:15.320
hear that voice? I mean,
this voice has always been there, but

475
00:39:15.480 --> 00:39:20.599
I was telling her to shut down
very very often because I was in my

476
00:39:20.679 --> 00:39:24.320
comfort zone. I wasn't anesthesia of
success, and I didn't want to get

477
00:39:24.400 --> 00:39:29.840
to move from there. And then
as I turned, I started really to

478
00:39:29.960 --> 00:39:32.519
talk with myself a lot, and
to listen for the first time to listen

479
00:39:32.639 --> 00:39:37.280
to myself. And after the surgery
it was nine months of solitude, so

480
00:39:37.360 --> 00:39:43.119
I had nothing else to than to
have this exchange. And at one point

481
00:39:46.159 --> 00:39:50.880
she pushed me to write, but
for the first time, it was with

482
00:39:51.159 --> 00:39:57.559
no intention. That means I had
no career pass behind the fact of becoming

483
00:39:57.599 --> 00:40:00.639
a writer. It was different.
It was autotic. It was respectful of

484
00:40:00.800 --> 00:40:05.800
my timing, It was respectful of
my body, It was RESTful of my

485
00:40:05.960 --> 00:40:14.119
belief which had changed. It was
with another spirit and still now where some

486
00:40:14.239 --> 00:40:16.519
people tell me you should write about
something, and I say no, it's

487
00:40:16.599 --> 00:40:21.119
not what I want to write about
or it's not what I want to talk

488
00:40:21.280 --> 00:40:25.159
about, because that's not me.
And I think if we talk about the

489
00:40:25.280 --> 00:40:30.280
Tadics, which is now over one
million views, which for the Techics in

490
00:40:30.400 --> 00:40:36.679
French is outstanding, I would have
been happy with ten thousand you And now

491
00:40:36.760 --> 00:40:40.159
it has titles in English and in
Spanish and in French, so it goes

492
00:40:40.440 --> 00:40:47.639
to international views as well. What
is striking the people is I am on

493
00:40:47.840 --> 00:40:52.280
stage like I'm in a book,
like I'm with you to date, totally

494
00:40:52.360 --> 00:40:58.000
authentic. I mean I have no
filter, yes, and I can tell

495
00:40:58.079 --> 00:41:01.159
that, and I love that's I'm
very very present and connected to because of

496
00:41:01.239 --> 00:41:05.199
that, And for our listeners who
might not have heard just what you said

497
00:41:05.199 --> 00:41:08.519
there, I want a presence an
incredibly beautiful and an important phrase that you

498
00:41:08.639 --> 00:41:15.119
just uttered, the anesthesia of success. Boy, that is just so important

499
00:41:15.119 --> 00:41:17.719
for our listeners to understand that you
can be extremely successful in life but not

500
00:41:17.960 --> 00:41:22.280
at all be living your compass or
your purpose. And so there's lots of

501
00:41:22.320 --> 00:41:27.599
ways that we can anesthesia anesthetize ourselves, but success is one of them.

502
00:41:27.679 --> 00:41:30.320
So I wanted to make sure they
heard that. So next because we're getting

503
00:41:30.320 --> 00:41:32.119
close to being out of time already. I want to get a couple more

504
00:41:32.119 --> 00:41:36.400
things out of you if I can
not a let I want to talk about

505
00:41:36.599 --> 00:41:40.039
how you're out now sharing your TED
talk and you're speaking as a motivational speaker.

506
00:41:40.679 --> 00:41:45.760
Because I'm a person who is all
about helping people become who they ache

507
00:41:45.800 --> 00:41:50.559
to become. Help us understand how
those experiences have been contributing to your own

508
00:41:51.119 --> 00:41:59.280
ongoing journey of transformation and becoming more
of who you really are today, because

509
00:42:00.960 --> 00:42:07.199
as I have no filter, and
I feel the responsibility to share and to

510
00:42:07.639 --> 00:42:12.440
pass on to new generations and to
help people not directly, but just by

511
00:42:12.719 --> 00:42:17.719
by examples. By saying that I
had success, for sure, some good

512
00:42:17.800 --> 00:42:22.679
things in life, but also some
failure, I become authentic and this brings

513
00:42:22.760 --> 00:42:28.239
me also to meet many, many
people and to many opportunities because I'm not

514
00:42:28.920 --> 00:42:35.159
searching them for the sake of fortune. I would say, so, really,

515
00:42:35.400 --> 00:42:44.519
what is happening is I would say
that I am no more in the

516
00:42:44.599 --> 00:42:49.360
dream I am in my life.
I am totally aligned soul, spirit and

517
00:42:49.480 --> 00:42:53.960
body, and paying attention and respect
to myself as to the others who I'm

518
00:42:54.239 --> 00:43:00.199
changing, not notly my attitude versus
myself, but also my attitude versus other

519
00:43:00.679 --> 00:43:07.599
which which is also that sometimes I
say no to some people because if I

520
00:43:07.719 --> 00:43:10.360
take an example, some people ask
me as a coach to coach them,

521
00:43:10.519 --> 00:43:16.840
and I say no. Today,
I'm a speaker nowadays and more more even

522
00:43:16.920 --> 00:43:22.960
more a writer, and it's no
more my job my mission to be a

523
00:43:22.039 --> 00:43:24.880
coach. So I'm no more a
coach, and I say no coaching for

524
00:43:24.960 --> 00:43:31.119
instance. I'm totally aligned to what
is my life and to what I can

525
00:43:31.239 --> 00:43:38.400
deliver the best for at this very
moment. So what's next for you?

526
00:43:38.760 --> 00:43:43.760
I think you make mention of a
second book. I guess you're probably writing

527
00:43:43.840 --> 00:43:45.480
something as we speak. But what's
on the horizon for you? Where are

528
00:43:45.519 --> 00:43:50.519
you taking your career next? My
carey is certainly as a writer. And

529
00:43:50.880 --> 00:43:52.760
just for the funny fit, I
want to mention that I have a dear,

530
00:43:52.840 --> 00:43:58.880
dear family New Orleans, La Fonta
of New Orleans, Jana and their

531
00:43:58.960 --> 00:44:02.000
parents, which I discover some ten
years ago. We are back to the

532
00:44:02.440 --> 00:44:09.119
eighteenth century. Together we caused the
ocean in different ways them through Cuba and

533
00:44:09.519 --> 00:44:15.320
Dominique and New Orleans and staying my
my my site staying in France, and

534
00:44:15.920 --> 00:44:21.159
that is part of the story of
this family I would like to to talk

535
00:44:21.199 --> 00:44:25.320
about and to write about. And
also I'm preparing a novel about how you

536
00:44:25.440 --> 00:44:32.320
can deliver yourself to being under too
much pressure and toxicity from others, but

537
00:44:32.559 --> 00:44:38.280
in the as a novel. And
also why not tellics in English in America?

538
00:44:38.440 --> 00:44:42.599
Why not? I don't know what
re happened, but I would love.

539
00:44:43.400 --> 00:44:50.719
I mean my my where I feel
I'm totally connected and right is when

540
00:44:50.800 --> 00:44:58.440
I am with people, sharing experience
and trying to go with them to another

541
00:44:58.599 --> 00:45:01.920
step and another a level of consciousness. And if I can I help,

542
00:45:02.000 --> 00:45:06.400
I'm just happing me too. I'm
right there with you. I would love

543
00:45:06.440 --> 00:45:08.480
to help get you understand of the
point and have you speaking to more audiences

544
00:45:08.559 --> 00:45:13.559
here are not a Latin and again
by English and well, and I need

545
00:45:13.599 --> 00:45:17.840
to practice my French big time,
so we'll do it together so for our

546
00:45:17.880 --> 00:45:22.639
listeners to really get present. You
say that so beautifully in your Tedex talk.

547
00:45:22.719 --> 00:45:27.639
But how would you compare and contrast
your life before and after this operation?

548
00:45:29.159 --> 00:45:32.599
You know what, I'm free.
I'm free because I'm less autonymous,

549
00:45:34.159 --> 00:45:38.400
but I'm free in my mind and
myself. I'm no more in a permanent

550
00:45:38.599 --> 00:45:43.320
fight like I was, but I'm
in the flu. And it's very important

551
00:45:43.360 --> 00:45:46.920
because everything happened easily when you are
in the flow phones meeting Elis Cortes,

552
00:45:47.039 --> 00:45:53.119
who leady in Seoghai, which is
what's also unprobable. And also, I

553
00:45:53.280 --> 00:45:57.360
think, and it's very important,
I'm a better person. I'm normal,

554
00:45:57.480 --> 00:46:01.920
this little tim at all in in
dresses I was, which was frightening,

555
00:46:02.320 --> 00:46:07.760
very efficient, but frightening. I
have no regret on who I was,

556
00:46:07.039 --> 00:46:12.000
and I had to pass through those
stage and I think one of the advice

557
00:46:12.079 --> 00:46:15.559
I should have given in life,
never have a regret of who you were,

558
00:46:15.079 --> 00:46:19.760
you have been, who you could
be at that time. And now

559
00:46:19.840 --> 00:46:22.440
you're different, you're better, or
you're worse, but you are who you

560
00:46:22.519 --> 00:46:27.880
are when you can. So really, I'm free and I'm in the field.

561
00:46:29.480 --> 00:46:32.599
Delightful and here we are at the
close already, nonolet So you know

562
00:46:32.840 --> 00:46:37.760
this program is intended to help people
across the world develop more meaning, passion,

563
00:46:37.119 --> 00:46:40.559
inspiration and purpose across their lives and
their work. With that, what

564
00:46:40.599 --> 00:46:45.320
would you like to leave our listeners
with today? Well, align your mind

565
00:46:45.480 --> 00:46:51.760
and your spirit and your body believing
too world. But live here and now

566
00:46:52.079 --> 00:46:57.159
get who you a grief and live
your life, your whole life behind because

567
00:46:57.199 --> 00:47:00.440
there's no use to keep it in
your mind. I dream a project and

568
00:47:00.599 --> 00:47:05.400
go for it, and decide what
is meaningful for you. No one else

569
00:47:05.760 --> 00:47:08.119
knows what is meaningful for you,
and go for it. You are we

570
00:47:08.360 --> 00:47:12.000
are. I am not a vity. I have a handicap, but I'm

571
00:47:12.039 --> 00:47:16.480
not my handicap. Group of Free, m Beautiful Finish to the to the

572
00:47:16.519 --> 00:47:20.840
show let Mercy Bo. Thank you
for joining us and working on a purpose.

573
00:47:20.880 --> 00:47:23.039
It has been an extreme delight and
pleasure to share you with my listeners.

574
00:47:24.719 --> 00:47:29.800
Thank you, Alice. Really,
I'm very grateful for your home welcome

575
00:47:29.920 --> 00:47:32.280
and to give me the supportunity which
I push it a lot. And you're

576
00:47:32.400 --> 00:47:37.519
very welcome, very welcome, and
listeners. Again, I wanted to share

577
00:47:37.519 --> 00:47:42.199
another let with you because I know
that you need inspiration to go for what

578
00:47:42.320 --> 00:47:45.599
you're what you're up to in life, and she is a tremendous source of

579
00:47:45.719 --> 00:47:50.079
inspiration and I'm here to deliver that
for you. So that's your present for

580
00:47:50.159 --> 00:47:52.800
the new year. This is the
beginning of twenty twenties, So happy new

581
00:47:52.880 --> 00:47:55.400
year to you. With that gift. If you want to learn more about

582
00:47:55.440 --> 00:47:59.800
not a let go her book or
her ted talk, you can you can

583
00:47:59.840 --> 00:48:01.719
be. You can get access to
all of those things by going to her

584
00:48:01.760 --> 00:48:06.920
website. It's nat Lafonta dot com. Let me spell that for you in

585
00:48:07.199 --> 00:48:14.559
a n A d A l E
T t E l A f o nta

586
00:48:14.800 --> 00:48:19.000
dot com. Nadlet lafonta dot com. Last week, if you missed the

587
00:48:19.039 --> 00:48:22.280
live show, you can always catch
a recorded podcast. We enjoyed a special

588
00:48:22.320 --> 00:48:28.000
conversation with Ellen Keith line Burn talking
about her unique approach to building culture and

589
00:48:28.119 --> 00:48:31.559
leaders inside organizations. See you next
week for another nurturing conversation. Remember that

590
00:48:31.599 --> 00:48:35.239
works at least a third of our
lives, So let's work on purpose.

591
00:48:38.199 --> 00:48:43.119
You hope you've enjoyed this week's program. Be sure to tune in to Working

592
00:48:43.199 --> 00:48:49.039
on Purpose featuring your host Alas Cortez, each week on the Voice America Empowerment

593
00:48:49.159 --> 00:48:52.119
Channel. This week, find your
life's purpose at work