March 3, 2026

The Heart of High Performance: The Transformative Power of Appreciation

The Heart of High Performance: The Transformative Power of Appreciation
iHeartRadio podcast player iconSpotify podcast player iconAmazon Music podcast player iconAudible podcast player iconPandora podcast player iconApple Podcasts podcast player iconPodchaser podcast player iconDeezer podcast player iconAudacy podcast player iconYoutube Music podcast player iconSpreaker podcast player iconPodcast Addict podcast player iconCastbox podcast player iconJioSaavn podcast player iconCastamatic podcast player iconCastro podcast player iconFountain podcast player iconGoodpods podcast player iconOvercast podcast player iconPlayerFM podcast player iconPocketCasts podcast player iconPodimo podcast player iconPodurama podcast player iconPodverse podcast player iconPodyssey podcast player iconYouTube podcast player iconRSS Feed podcast player icon
iHeartRadio podcast player iconSpotify podcast player iconAmazon Music podcast player iconAudible podcast player iconPandora podcast player iconApple Podcasts podcast player iconPodchaser podcast player iconDeezer podcast player iconAudacy podcast player iconYoutube Music podcast player iconSpreaker podcast player iconPodcast Addict podcast player iconCastbox podcast player iconJioSaavn podcast player iconCastamatic podcast player iconCastro podcast player iconFountain podcast player iconGoodpods podcast player iconOvercast podcast player iconPlayerFM podcast player iconPocketCasts podcast player iconPodimo podcast player iconPodurama podcast player iconPodverse podcast player iconPodyssey podcast player iconYouTube podcast player iconRSS Feed podcast player icon

What if the missing ingredient in your engagement strategy isn’t better rewards—but deeper appreciation? While recognition programs spotlight desired behaviors, authentic appreciation acknowledges the whole person behind the work. It carries both intention and heart. And unlike recognition, it isn’t confined to hierarchy—it can move across teams. Dr. Paul White explores how cultivating a culture of appreciation elevates motivation, strengthens relationships, and sustains meaningful performance.

Working on Purpose is broadcast live Tuesdays at 6PM ET and Music on W4CY Radio (www.w4cy.com) part of Talk 4 Radio (www.talk4radio.com) on the Talk 4 Media Network (www.talk4media.com). Working on Purpose is viewed on Talk 4 TV (www.talk4tv.com).

Working on Purpose Podcast is also available on Talk 4 Media (www.talk4media.com), Talk 4 Podcasting (www.talk4podcasting.com), iHeartRadio, Amazon Music, Pandora, Spotify, Audible, and over 100 other podcast outlets.

Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/working-on-purpose--2643411/support.

WEBVTT

1
00:00:00.120 --> 00:00:02.359
The topics and opinions express in the following show are

2
00:00:02.359 --> 00:00:04.000
solely those of the hosts and their guests, and not

3
00:00:04.040 --> 00:00:06.919
those of W FOURCY Radio. It's employees are affiliates. We

4
00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:10.080
make no recommendations or endorsements for radio show programs, services,

5
00:00:10.160 --> 00:00:12.480
or products mentioned on air or on our web. No

6
00:00:12.560 --> 00:00:15.759
liability explicitor implies shall be extended to W FOURCY Radio

7
00:00:15.839 --> 00:00:18.559
or its employees are affiliates. Any questions or comments should

8
00:00:18.559 --> 00:00:20.920
be directed to those show hosts. Thank you for choosing

9
00:00:21.039 --> 00:00:26.320
W FOURCY Radio.

10
00:00:28.199 --> 00:00:31.640
What's working on Purpose? Anyway? Each week we ponder the

11
00:00:31.640 --> 00:00:34.840
answer to this question. People ache for meaning and purpose

12
00:00:34.840 --> 00:00:38.200
at work, to contribute their talents passionately and know their

13
00:00:38.240 --> 00:00:41.640
lives really matter. They crave being part of an organization

14
00:00:41.719 --> 00:00:44.439
that inspires them and helps them grow into realizing their

15
00:00:44.520 --> 00:00:47.560
highest potential. Business can be such a force for good

16
00:00:47.560 --> 00:00:51.159
in the world, elevating humanity. In our program, we provide

17
00:00:51.200 --> 00:00:54.280
guidance and inspiration to help usher in this world we

18
00:00:54.320 --> 00:00:58.640
all want working on Purpose. Now here's your host, doctor

19
00:00:58.640 --> 00:00:59.719
Elise Cortes.

20
00:01:05.439 --> 00:01:07.519
Welcome back to the Working Purpose Program, which has been

21
00:01:07.560 --> 00:01:10.280
brought to you with Passionate Prize since February twenty fifteen.

22
00:01:10.280 --> 00:01:12.000
Thanks for tuning again this week. Great to have you.

23
00:01:12.319 --> 00:01:14.959
I'm your host, Doctor release Cortes. If we've not met

24
00:01:14.959 --> 00:01:17.400
before and you don't know me, I'm a workforce advisor,

25
00:01:17.560 --> 00:01:22.319
organizational psychologist, management consultant, logo therapist, speaker and author. I

26
00:01:22.319 --> 00:01:25.680
am constantly researching and helping my clients elevate their game

27
00:01:25.719 --> 00:01:27.840
and their culture. My team and I a gusta Now

28
00:01:27.879 --> 00:01:31.840
help companies to enliven and fortify their operations by building dynamic,

29
00:01:31.920 --> 00:01:35.840
high performance cultures, inspirational leadership and nurturing managers activity by

30
00:01:35.879 --> 00:01:39.000
meaning and purpose. And did you know that inspired employees

31
00:01:39.040 --> 00:01:42.680
and purpose led companies outperform their satisfied peers by factor

32
00:01:42.680 --> 00:01:45.159
of two point twenty five to one. In other words,

33
00:01:45.159 --> 00:01:47.400
inspiration and purpose are good for the bottom line. You

34
00:01:47.439 --> 00:01:49.000
can learn more AboutUs and know we can work together

35
00:01:49.079 --> 00:01:52.760
at gustodeshnow dot com and my personal site at Lascortes

36
00:01:52.799 --> 00:01:56.000
dot com. If you're getting in today's program, we are

37
00:01:56.079 --> 00:01:59.000
joined today by doctor Paul White, who is a psychologist,

38
00:01:59.040 --> 00:02:02.400
author and speaker who makes work relationships work. As a

39
00:02:02.400 --> 00:02:05.120
speaker and trainer, Doctor White has taught around the world,

40
00:02:05.159 --> 00:02:08.400
including North America, Europe, South America, Asia, and the Caribbean.

41
00:02:08.759 --> 00:02:11.319
He's the co author of the best selling book The

42
00:02:11.319 --> 00:02:15.000
Five Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace, Empowering organizations by

43
00:02:15.080 --> 00:02:19.080
Encouraging People. With co author doctor Gary Chapman, we'll be

44
00:02:19.080 --> 00:02:21.759
talking today about the ROI of appreciation in the workplace,

45
00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.520
how it differs from recognition, and examples of the Five

46
00:02:24.599 --> 00:02:28.159
Languages of Appreciation. You joined today from Wichita, Kansas. A

47
00:02:28.199 --> 00:02:30.599
hearty welcome, doctor White to Working on Purpose.

48
00:02:31.280 --> 00:02:32.759
Thanks glad to be with you.

49
00:02:32.919 --> 00:02:34.800
Isn't it great? I'm so happy to have you, and

50
00:02:34.840 --> 00:02:37.240
I want to celebrate this beautiful thing you put into

51
00:02:37.280 --> 00:02:38.719
the world. Gorgeous.

52
00:02:39.080 --> 00:02:39.479
Thank you.

53
00:02:39.800 --> 00:02:42.240
Absolutely enjoy it. I appreciate align with it, which is

54
00:02:42.280 --> 00:02:43.800
why I reached out to you on LinkedIn and said,

55
00:02:43.840 --> 00:02:45.680
please come on Working in Purpose and talk about this

56
00:02:45.759 --> 00:02:46.000
with me.

57
00:02:47.280 --> 00:02:48.560
Yeah, glad to do that.

58
00:02:48.800 --> 00:02:52.800
And we're pleased that the book has done well over time.

59
00:02:52.879 --> 00:02:56.599
That recently went over eight hundred thousand copies.

60
00:02:56.680 --> 00:02:59.759
So we're hope on our way to a million. But

61
00:03:00.400 --> 00:03:01.479
that's all right whatever.

62
00:03:01.879 --> 00:03:04.919
So listeners and viewers, for a little context, The average

63
00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:07.879
book doesn't sell more than three thousand copies. Just a

64
00:03:07.919 --> 00:03:12.960
little context for you. So this really is something to celebrate. Okay,

65
00:03:13.039 --> 00:03:16.680
So let's just start doctor Paul with a bit of

66
00:03:16.719 --> 00:03:19.599
your background and what drew you to researching the appreciation

67
00:03:19.759 --> 00:03:22.319
space and how I'll get to look kind of the

68
00:03:22.319 --> 00:03:23.919
work that you do, and how you met doctor Chapman

69
00:03:23.919 --> 00:03:25.840
as well. But let's start with you know, why appreciation,

70
00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:26.840
why the workplace?

71
00:03:27.199 --> 00:03:27.520
Yeah.

72
00:03:27.680 --> 00:03:31.240
So, actually the first part of my career I tested

73
00:03:31.280 --> 00:03:34.439
students with learning difficulties ADHD and dyslexia and all those

74
00:03:34.520 --> 00:03:37.080
kinds of things. Mid career, I had some friends who

75
00:03:37.080 --> 00:03:39.759
were business consultants that knew that I had grown up

76
00:03:39.800 --> 00:03:43.080
in the context of a family owned business and asked

77
00:03:43.159 --> 00:03:45.039
me to help them because they kept running in the

78
00:03:45.120 --> 00:03:48.560
family issues as they were dealing with businesses because eighty

79
00:03:48.560 --> 00:03:50.719
five percent of all the companies in the US are

80
00:03:50.759 --> 00:03:53.800
family owned. And so I did that, traveled around, got

81
00:03:53.800 --> 00:03:59.280
to work with significantly wealthy families and businesses dealing with

82
00:03:59.319 --> 00:04:03.599
the family issue at crossover and business succession. And I

83
00:04:03.639 --> 00:04:06.680
was in North Carolina talking to in this case the

84
00:04:06.719 --> 00:04:10.319
father and business owner asked him how the plan was going,

85
00:04:10.599 --> 00:04:12.960
and he said, it's fine, my son's stepping up.

86
00:04:13.000 --> 00:04:15.639
I think it's going to work, and I walked across.

87
00:04:15.280 --> 00:04:17.000
The hall and I asked the son the same question.

88
00:04:17.079 --> 00:04:20.160
He said, this is a disaster. It's never going to work.

89
00:04:20.199 --> 00:04:23.720
I can't ever please my dad, which I understand and

90
00:04:23.800 --> 00:04:27.040
identify with. So my wife and I were reading The

91
00:04:27.120 --> 00:04:31.399
Five Love Languages by doctor Chapman at that time, you know,

92
00:04:31.480 --> 00:04:35.959
bestseller in personal relationships, sold twenty five million copies, and

93
00:04:36.199 --> 00:04:37.920
I thought, I wonder if this could help.

94
00:04:37.759 --> 00:04:42.399
You know, in family businesses and businesses. So I pursued

95
00:04:42.439 --> 00:04:43.519
doctor Chapman for a year.

96
00:04:43.560 --> 00:04:45.319
It took me a year to get through to him

97
00:04:46.079 --> 00:04:50.680
and pitched the idea, and he had had others pitch.

98
00:04:50.759 --> 00:04:52.959
But I had sort of a background both in business

99
00:04:53.120 --> 00:04:56.399
and in relationships, and I had the good fortune of

100
00:04:56.680 --> 00:04:59.560
having attended the same undergraduate school that he did.

101
00:04:59.360 --> 00:05:00.759
And so I think that was a little bit of

102
00:05:00.759 --> 00:05:01.600
a foot in the door.

103
00:05:01.639 --> 00:05:04.680
And so off we went and wrote the book together

104
00:05:04.879 --> 00:05:08.480
and developed an online assessment which has been taken by

105
00:05:08.560 --> 00:05:12.439
almost five hundred thousand people, and then training materials to

106
00:05:13.399 --> 00:05:16.639
allow people to learn how to apply the concepts in

107
00:05:16.680 --> 00:05:17.800
their daily lives.

108
00:05:18.959 --> 00:05:21.920
I really appreciate it, of course, as somebody who develops

109
00:05:21.959 --> 00:05:25.879
cultures of Gustonian's racial leadership appreciation is foundational. So I'm

110
00:05:25.920 --> 00:05:28.920
totally aligned with you, doctor Paul and want to help.

111
00:05:29.000 --> 00:05:32.120
Now let's help our listeners and viewers understand the difference. Well, first,

112
00:05:32.199 --> 00:05:34.720
let's talk about this. I want to talk about the

113
00:05:34.800 --> 00:05:38.519
return on investment for appreciation. You know, what does it

114
00:05:38.560 --> 00:05:40.920
actually yield in the workplace? For those listeners viewers who

115
00:05:40.920 --> 00:05:41.319
don't know.

116
00:05:41.360 --> 00:05:45.279
Yet, Yeah, so, I mean a lot of business leaders

117
00:05:45.279 --> 00:05:48.319
and organizational leaders think, you know, it's about making people

118
00:05:48.319 --> 00:05:50.240
happy and feel good, and we want that to happen,

119
00:05:50.279 --> 00:05:54.519
and it usually does. But really the impact is in

120
00:05:54.560 --> 00:05:57.920
how the organization functions that we know, Like right now,

121
00:05:58.079 --> 00:06:03.279
for a lot of organizations, turnover is high, and we

122
00:06:03.319 --> 00:06:04.519
can reduce that.

123
00:06:05.439 --> 00:06:08.560
We reduce conflict within the workplace.

124
00:06:08.680 --> 00:06:12.839
We increase productivity when team members feel valued and appreciated,

125
00:06:13.199 --> 00:06:18.879
productivity and profitability increases profitability largely because the single largest

126
00:06:18.959 --> 00:06:21.399
non productive cost is turnover.

127
00:06:22.560 --> 00:06:23.399
You can reduce that.

128
00:06:23.560 --> 00:06:28.800
We can make things go better and it's it's fun

129
00:06:28.839 --> 00:06:33.639
because it's really one of these issues that our assessment is.

130
00:06:34.680 --> 00:06:37.920
You know a lot of managers and leaders have taken

131
00:06:38.680 --> 00:06:41.360
a kind of personality assessments or whatever, but most front

132
00:06:41.399 --> 00:06:44.360
line people don't get that opportunity, and so we by

133
00:06:44.439 --> 00:06:50.160
stars low enough that you know, PepsiCo across their organization, Miller, Cores,

134
00:06:50.680 --> 00:06:54.560
Caterpillar are using it with their frontline workers and they

135
00:06:54.600 --> 00:06:57.600
really enjoy it's sort of you know, self discovery, and

136
00:06:57.639 --> 00:06:59.639
also they share it with their team members, and so

137
00:07:00.160 --> 00:07:03.399
good things happen when people feel valued and appreciated and

138
00:07:05.639 --> 00:07:08.639
sort of out of self interest, managers enjoy their work

139
00:07:08.720 --> 00:07:11.199
more because they're not having to deal with all these

140
00:07:11.240 --> 00:07:15.920
stupid little conflicts over size of you know, the computer

141
00:07:16.319 --> 00:07:19.279
or whether the person has a window, or all the

142
00:07:19.319 --> 00:07:24.759
things that really aren't relevant to the mission of the team.

143
00:07:24.800 --> 00:07:27.800
A couple of things in response to that one. You know,

144
00:07:27.879 --> 00:07:31.800
in the years that I've spent in measuring our employee

145
00:07:31.800 --> 00:07:34.839
engagement and diagnosing culture, et cetera, we know when you

146
00:07:34.879 --> 00:07:37.279
say this in your book that the number one driver

147
00:07:37.439 --> 00:07:41.279
for employee engagement and satisfaction is that be feeling valued

148
00:07:41.279 --> 00:07:44.120
and appreciated. So that's the first thing. The second thing

149
00:07:44.120 --> 00:07:46.680
I want to say about you mentioned how much this

150
00:07:46.759 --> 00:07:50.040
idea of inculcating appreciation neu versation helps with retention. You

151
00:07:50.079 --> 00:07:52.199
have some fantastic stats in your book that ought to

152
00:07:52.199 --> 00:07:56.040
give leaders some tremendous pause that the cost to replace

153
00:07:56.120 --> 00:07:58.199
what a frontline person is one hundred and fifty percent

154
00:07:58.240 --> 00:08:01.399
of their salary, and a highlight executive something like four

155
00:08:01.480 --> 00:08:03.759
hundred percent of their salary. Right, So, in other words,

156
00:08:03.800 --> 00:08:07.319
let's learn how to put appreciation into our businesses, shall we, Folks?

157
00:08:07.959 --> 00:08:09.560
This is worth your time and effort.

158
00:08:10.319 --> 00:08:13.199
Yeah, And research continues to come out to the shows that,

159
00:08:13.480 --> 00:08:17.319
in fact, right now, the EU, the European Union, and

160
00:08:17.560 --> 00:08:22.600
the Securities and Exchange Commission in the US are implementing

161
00:08:22.920 --> 00:08:29.519
procedures and laws and regulations about companies having to report

162
00:08:31.079 --> 00:08:36.960
their efforts on employee satisfaction and retention appreciation. Because two

163
00:08:37.000 --> 00:08:39.879
companies that you know, do the same kind of thing.

164
00:08:40.320 --> 00:08:43.639
If one pays attention to that factor, they're going to

165
00:08:43.679 --> 00:08:48.600
outperform their competitors significantly. And so that makes it, you know,

166
00:08:48.679 --> 00:08:51.799
a difference to an investor, right that you're going to

167
00:08:52.399 --> 00:08:54.320
go with a company that earns you more.

168
00:08:55.960 --> 00:09:00.159
I appreciate that distinction. I didn't know that about that legislation. Okay, well,

169
00:09:00.240 --> 00:09:03.440
let's do this. I think lots of organizations are now

170
00:09:03.519 --> 00:09:06.639
hearing very distinctive terms terms. We hear things about mattering

171
00:09:06.639 --> 00:09:11.279
and belonging. Those are distinctive terms. Recognition and appreciation are

172
00:09:11.320 --> 00:09:14.240
distinctive terms. Can you distinguish them for us?

173
00:09:15.080 --> 00:09:15.960
Sure? Yeah.

174
00:09:16.080 --> 00:09:18.879
Employee recognition has been around for you know, a couple

175
00:09:18.879 --> 00:09:26.039
of decades, and it has improved the workplace to some degree. However,

176
00:09:26.600 --> 00:09:30.159
it's stalled out over the last decade or so because

177
00:09:30.519 --> 00:09:33.039
employee recognition is largely institutional.

178
00:09:33.039 --> 00:09:36.039
It's organizational comes down from the top, you know.

179
00:09:35.960 --> 00:09:40.879
The executive team, maybe through HR, and it's largely about performance.

180
00:09:41.080 --> 00:09:46.440
I mean, they're recognizing and rewarding people who are meeting

181
00:09:46.480 --> 00:09:50.440
goals and creating profits and so forth, which is good

182
00:09:51.080 --> 00:09:56.039
when it's implemented well and consistently, which is a big

183
00:09:56.080 --> 00:09:57.879
if because that doesn't often happen.

184
00:09:58.600 --> 00:10:02.679
But right now, I mean, employee engagement has continued.

185
00:10:02.279 --> 00:10:08.559
To go down over the past several years, and people leaving,

186
00:10:08.600 --> 00:10:11.440
turnover goes up, and so they.

187
00:10:11.399 --> 00:10:14.519
Really stalled and it's it's a tough field.

188
00:10:14.559 --> 00:10:16.759
I'll just you know, I'm a Midwestern I want to

189
00:10:16.759 --> 00:10:19.639
just be straight that you know, there there is there

190
00:10:19.639 --> 00:10:26.519
are some significant companies that are locked into employee recognition

191
00:10:26.799 --> 00:10:29.480
because that's how they earn their money through the rewards

192
00:10:29.480 --> 00:10:31.559
and all that billions and billions of dollars are spent,

193
00:10:32.039 --> 00:10:35.320
but they really don't have the impact that the organization

194
00:10:35.399 --> 00:10:39.960
is happening. Employee appreciation and we focus on authentic appreciation.

195
00:10:40.679 --> 00:10:42.159
It really is about the person.

196
00:10:43.440 --> 00:10:46.480
That we believe that employees and team members are more

197
00:10:46.600 --> 00:10:51.240
than just a production unit, that we have characteristics that

198
00:10:51.279 --> 00:10:54.519
are of value. In addition, I personally like to work

199
00:10:54.559 --> 00:10:57.840
with cheerful people more than grumpy people, you know, and

200
00:10:58.799 --> 00:11:03.320
other kinds of things that are value outside of your performance.

201
00:11:03.639 --> 00:11:06.320
And also it's person to person, it's not down the

202
00:11:06.440 --> 00:11:09.279
org chart. One of the cool things that we found

203
00:11:09.919 --> 00:11:14.240
can facilitate is people being able to communicate appreciation across

204
00:11:14.240 --> 00:11:18.919
the organization's team members to a different department top down,

205
00:11:19.639 --> 00:11:23.080
from you know, a frontline worker to their supervisor.

206
00:11:23.320 --> 00:11:26.200
So it's really person to person and that's the focus

207
00:11:26.279 --> 00:11:26.559
of it.

208
00:11:27.360 --> 00:11:29.840
Thank you. I think that love is a beautiful explanation

209
00:11:29.879 --> 00:11:32.759
and way to distinguish those two things. We'll get more

210
00:11:33.799 --> 00:11:36.039
into this because I think you say in your book

211
00:11:36.080 --> 00:11:39.879
that ninety three percent of organizations have an employee recognition program.

212
00:11:40.240 --> 00:11:42.000
So very often, of course, as you say, that's when

213
00:11:42.000 --> 00:11:45.200
you're oftentimes recognizing them for how long they've been with

214
00:11:45.240 --> 00:11:47.120
the company, or you know, they get the plats and

215
00:11:47.120 --> 00:11:49.840
all that kind of stuff, and this is really about

216
00:11:49.879 --> 00:11:51.799
more of the day to day interaction of being able

217
00:11:51.799 --> 00:11:54.320
to really value who the human is. And so I

218
00:11:54.399 --> 00:11:56.240
want to just really call that out and celebrate that

219
00:11:56.240 --> 00:11:59.320
to that very much aligns with our approach to creating

220
00:11:59.639 --> 00:12:01.879
culture of gusto and destination workplaces.

221
00:12:02.480 --> 00:12:02.759
Cool.

222
00:12:02.960 --> 00:12:09.799
Cool, Yeah, it's and to be honest, you know, some supervisors, owners,

223
00:12:09.879 --> 00:12:11.799
managers get it and others don't.

224
00:12:12.320 --> 00:12:12.879
Sure, and.

225
00:12:14.440 --> 00:12:15.039
That's fine.

226
00:12:15.080 --> 00:12:18.320
You know, we try to help those who are interested

227
00:12:18.320 --> 00:12:22.519
to grow in it. And actually when we're in a workplace,

228
00:12:22.799 --> 00:12:24.840
we'll ask people that aren't that in are to sort

229
00:12:24.879 --> 00:12:28.080
of step to the side and not be obstructive and

230
00:12:28.200 --> 00:12:30.279
just watch, and lots of times we win them over

231
00:12:30.519 --> 00:12:35.279
when they see that we're focused on authenticity and realistic

232
00:12:35.320 --> 00:12:38.240
feedback versus just going through the motions and saying or

233
00:12:38.279 --> 00:12:41.879
doing something because you're supposed to m you have.

234
00:12:42.039 --> 00:12:44.919
I think as a whole if I recall a whole

235
00:12:45.000 --> 00:12:47.639
chapter in your book on why leaders resist appreciation, which

236
00:12:47.679 --> 00:12:49.480
is really interesting and I've certainly encounter this too in

237
00:12:49.519 --> 00:12:52.159
my own work developing leaders and cultures, and you know,

238
00:12:52.200 --> 00:12:54.679
you say it in your book. You know, oftentimes when

239
00:12:54.679 --> 00:12:57.120
you when a leader resists that, what's behind that is

240
00:12:57.559 --> 00:13:01.120
why should I be concerned about communicating appreciation to employees

241
00:13:01.159 --> 00:13:01.919
when I pay them?

242
00:13:01.960 --> 00:13:02.960
That's what they're here for.

243
00:13:03.960 --> 00:13:05.600
And I hear it all the time with the people

244
00:13:05.600 --> 00:13:08.679
that I'm working with organizations to Paul, where it's just

245
00:13:08.720 --> 00:13:10.919
this one, what are you talking about? I this is

246
00:13:10.919 --> 00:13:12.559
how I came up, and this is what it is

247
00:13:12.600 --> 00:13:16.000
that you do. But yet you beautifully situate this too.

248
00:13:16.080 --> 00:13:19.039
You've talked about the retention opportunity and benefit the return

249
00:13:19.279 --> 00:13:21.639
on an investment there. But then you also have this

250
00:13:21.720 --> 00:13:25.080
tremendous motivation wherein you actually say in your book that

251
00:13:25.559 --> 00:13:28.360
four out four out of five employees say that they

252
00:13:28.360 --> 00:13:31.440
are motivated to work harder when their boss shows appreciation

253
00:13:31.559 --> 00:13:35.159
for their work. Wow. So now we've a discretionary effort,

254
00:13:35.240 --> 00:13:38.440
we have commitment, we have loyalty. So a few reasons

255
00:13:38.440 --> 00:13:40.600
that we might want to consider this idea. Why should

256
00:13:40.600 --> 00:13:43.840
I give somebody appreciation when I already give them a paycheck? Yeah?

257
00:13:43.879 --> 00:13:45.600
And also I think a big.

258
00:13:46.840 --> 00:13:50.039
Barrier for a lot of leaders at whatever level they

259
00:13:50.039 --> 00:13:52.639
are is that they're busy, you know, and they say, yeah,

260
00:13:53.679 --> 00:13:55.320
how am I going to fit this in? I'm supposed

261
00:13:55.320 --> 00:13:59.080
to do this as well. And what we found is that, yes,

262
00:13:59.159 --> 00:14:03.799
we want leaders at whatever level involved, but really sort

263
00:14:03.840 --> 00:14:07.080
of the secret Sauce has been teaching team members how

264
00:14:07.120 --> 00:14:10.919
to show appreciation to one another. And you know, as

265
00:14:11.000 --> 00:14:14.600
younger generations have come into the workforce, they're more focused

266
00:14:14.639 --> 00:14:18.440
on peer and collegial relationships than you know, top down,

267
00:14:18.639 --> 00:14:22.720
and so those kinds of actions from their colleagues are

268
00:14:22.720 --> 00:14:23.759
more meaningful to them.

269
00:14:24.600 --> 00:14:26.679
Yeah, that's one of the things that I find really

270
00:14:26.720 --> 00:14:30.080
strong about your whole approach, Paul, is you know that

271
00:14:30.200 --> 00:14:32.799
you realize that there is strength in creating a culture

272
00:14:32.799 --> 00:14:35.559
of appreciation, which means it's not all on the manager's shoulders,

273
00:14:35.559 --> 00:14:38.399
and that other people, other team members can support and

274
00:14:38.440 --> 00:14:40.799
appreciate each other, and we want that we encourage that

275
00:14:41.159 --> 00:14:43.440
everybody wins and that way it isn't just on the

276
00:14:43.440 --> 00:14:45.600
manager to do that, which reduces some of that load

277
00:14:45.639 --> 00:14:47.799
that they already feel as a result. So I think

278
00:14:47.799 --> 00:14:50.879
that's really strong about your approach to and then of

279
00:14:50.919 --> 00:14:54.759
course making the assessment price successful to pretty much anybody

280
00:14:54.759 --> 00:14:57.320
also helps too. Yeah.

281
00:14:57.399 --> 00:15:00.799
You know, when I worked with wealthy families and businesses.

282
00:15:01.279 --> 00:15:03.879
I learned that you can either go high end and

283
00:15:04.200 --> 00:15:09.559
you know, really customized service and just reach a few,

284
00:15:09.679 --> 00:15:11.720
or you can sort of try to keep the cost

285
00:15:11.799 --> 00:15:14.399
lo and go to the greater population.

286
00:15:14.919 --> 00:15:17.159
And I grew up professionally.

287
00:15:16.639 --> 00:15:20.159
In the not for profit uh world, you know, serving

288
00:15:20.159 --> 00:15:22.200
where a lot of people give a lot, but there's

289
00:15:22.360 --> 00:15:25.200
don't have much money for rewards and training, and I

290
00:15:25.279 --> 00:15:27.679
just wanted to try to reach those. So we've kept

291
00:15:27.679 --> 00:15:30.960
the cost low so that you know, it can it

292
00:15:30.960 --> 00:15:33.759
can be utilized. But anyway, I mean if you do

293
00:15:34.440 --> 00:15:37.279
everybody at once, which most companies don't do, I mean

294
00:15:37.480 --> 00:15:40.240
you just sort of piece meal it over time, you.

295
00:15:40.159 --> 00:15:44.840
Know, department, provide, department, and it can be done.

296
00:15:44.840 --> 00:15:48.279
Easily, especially if you quit giving away of you know,

297
00:15:48.639 --> 00:15:51.240
millions and billions of dollars of gifts that aren't you know,

298
00:15:51.320 --> 00:15:53.600
returning much to you as a company.

299
00:15:54.279 --> 00:15:55.879
Yes, and I want to talk more about that after

300
00:15:55.960 --> 00:15:58.720
the break, but let's wrap our first break. I am

301
00:15:58.759 --> 00:16:00.799
your host, Doctorally score As, who are on the year

302
00:16:00.799 --> 00:16:03.799
of doctor Paul White, who is a psychologist, author, and

303
00:16:03.840 --> 00:16:07.480
speaker who makes work relationships work. As a speaker and trainer,

304
00:16:07.559 --> 00:16:10.039
Doctor White has taught around the world. We've been talking

305
00:16:10.080 --> 00:16:13.840
about the basis of appreciation, why it's important to develop

306
00:16:13.879 --> 00:16:16.200
in an organization, how you can start to extinguish it

307
00:16:16.240 --> 00:16:19.200
from recognition. After the break, we're going to talk about

308
00:16:20.039 --> 00:16:26.799
why the benefits of recognition really aren't there, as we've

309
00:16:26.799 --> 00:16:28.840
been sort of hinting at what's under that, and then

310
00:16:28.840 --> 00:16:31.840
we'll start talking about the five languages appreciation in the workplace.

311
00:16:31.960 --> 00:16:32.720
We'll be right back.

312
00:16:49.039 --> 00:16:52.240
Doctor Elise Court has as a management consultant specializing in

313
00:16:52.320 --> 00:16:56.000
meaning and purpose. An inspirational speaker and author, she helps

314
00:16:56.039 --> 00:16:59.440
companies visioneer for a greater purpose among stakeholders and develop

315
00:16:59.519 --> 00:17:04.279
purpose and fired leadership and meaning infused cultures that elevate fulfillment, performance,

316
00:17:04.319 --> 00:17:07.359
and commitment within the workforce. To learn more or to

317
00:17:07.400 --> 00:17:10.319
invite a lease to speak to your organization, please visit

318
00:17:10.319 --> 00:17:13.559
her at elisecortes dot com. Let's talk about how to

319
00:17:13.559 --> 00:17:22.119
get your employees working on purpose. This is working on

320
00:17:22.160 --> 00:17:25.720
Purpose with doctor Elise Cortes. To reach our program today

321
00:17:25.880 --> 00:17:28.599
or to open a conversation with Elise, send an email

322
00:17:28.680 --> 00:17:34.240
to Elise A. Lisee at elisecortes dot com. Now back

323
00:17:34.279 --> 00:17:35.599
to working on purpose.

324
00:17:39.960 --> 00:17:41.720
Thanks for Jane with us, and welcome back to Working

325
00:17:41.799 --> 00:17:44.519
on Purpose. I'm your host, doctor Elise Cortes, as I

326
00:17:44.559 --> 00:17:46.960
am dedicated to help them create a world or organizations

327
00:17:47.000 --> 00:17:48.759
thrive because there are people thrive whether are led by

328
00:17:48.799 --> 00:17:51.599
inspirational leaders that help them find and contribute their greatness,

329
00:17:51.720 --> 00:17:53.400
and we do business in a way that betters the world.

330
00:17:53.440 --> 00:17:55.839
I keep researching and writing my own books. So one

331
00:17:55.880 --> 00:17:58.680
of my leaders came out. It's called The Great Revitalization.

332
00:17:58.839 --> 00:18:02.119
How activating meaning and can radically enliven your business. And

333
00:18:02.160 --> 00:18:04.920
I wrote it to help leaders understand today's workforce better.

334
00:18:04.960 --> 00:18:06.640
What do they want and need from you to give

335
00:18:06.640 --> 00:18:08.559
you their best and want to stick around? And then

336
00:18:08.559 --> 00:18:11.279
I provide you twenty two best practices to equip you

337
00:18:11.319 --> 00:18:13.680
to provide that through your leadership and your culture. You

338
00:18:13.720 --> 00:18:15.920
can find my books on Amazon or my personal website

339
00:18:15.920 --> 00:18:18.319
at least coore test dot com if you are just

340
00:18:18.359 --> 00:18:20.559
now joining us. My guest is doctor Paul White. He's

341
00:18:20.559 --> 00:18:22.880
the co author of the Five Languages of Appreciation in

342
00:18:22.880 --> 00:18:27.480
the Workplace, Empowering organizations by encouraging people. So as we

343
00:18:27.519 --> 00:18:31.200
started to hint at in the first segment, doctor Paul,

344
00:18:31.200 --> 00:18:35.039
we were talking about how traditional recognition programs really aren't

345
00:18:35.039 --> 00:18:37.720
working today, and I think it's important that we help

346
00:18:37.759 --> 00:18:41.119
our listeners and viewers understand why and really what's under that. So,

347
00:18:41.200 --> 00:18:45.079
of course, there's the plaque phenomenon or certificate phenomenon that

348
00:18:45.119 --> 00:18:47.599
we have where you're usually recognizing linked of service or

349
00:18:47.640 --> 00:18:50.680
something like that, which I think you say is like

350
00:18:50.720 --> 00:18:53.200
fifty percent a trophy or something like that, and then

351
00:18:53.400 --> 00:18:56.039
another thirty five percent which comes in some form of

352
00:18:56.079 --> 00:18:59.680
non monetary reward letter or public recognition being trotted across

353
00:18:59.720 --> 00:19:02.640
the state or whatever. See a bit more about why

354
00:19:02.720 --> 00:19:06.400
these programs aren't really working to motivate and retain people.

355
00:19:07.720 --> 00:19:10.559
Well, it partly has to do with the nature of

356
00:19:11.160 --> 00:19:11.599
as people.

357
00:19:11.640 --> 00:19:15.799
I mean, I have a hard time figuring out getting

358
00:19:15.799 --> 00:19:18.119
a plaque for past service how that.

359
00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:19.880
Motivates me towards future behavior.

360
00:19:20.119 --> 00:19:23.359
It's just not what we know about how humans work

361
00:19:23.440 --> 00:19:25.920
too much. I mean, we appreciate it, but it doesn't

362
00:19:25.920 --> 00:19:28.759
mean we're going to do much more. Also, one of

363
00:19:28.799 --> 00:19:33.799
the biggest issues is that repeatedly, the top ten or

364
00:19:33.839 --> 00:19:37.319
fifteen percent of any organization, whether it's a department or

365
00:19:37.359 --> 00:19:41.200
a division or company, are the ones that get recognized repeatedly.

366
00:19:41.920 --> 00:19:44.240
And so you have your big group of fifty to

367
00:19:44.279 --> 00:19:46.079
sixty percent below.

368
00:19:45.839 --> 00:19:47.359
Then that are good people.

369
00:19:47.440 --> 00:19:51.240
They're working hard, maybe they're newer and they're still learning

370
00:19:51.279 --> 00:19:55.640
their positions, but they're not hearing anything. And so we

371
00:19:55.759 --> 00:20:00.680
know clearly that once they should say twenty nine percent

372
00:20:00.759 --> 00:20:03.839
of people that left a job cited a lack of

373
00:20:03.920 --> 00:20:07.960
appreciation as the main reason. When you don't hear things,

374
00:20:08.119 --> 00:20:11.480
you leave. And so we're really I mean, you can

375
00:20:13.400 --> 00:20:17.920
implement and improve performance of your high performers, but it's

376
00:20:17.960 --> 00:20:20.359
sort of like a sports team, a football team. You

377
00:20:20.359 --> 00:20:22.200
can have stars, but you have to have blockers and

378
00:20:22.240 --> 00:20:25.720
tacklers too. You have to have regular, everyday people. Unless

379
00:20:25.759 --> 00:20:27.880
you're a really small organization, I have lost stars. And

380
00:20:27.920 --> 00:20:34.240
so focusing on what motivates people and rewards them, and

381
00:20:34.400 --> 00:20:36.799
what we found is that not everybody feels valued and

382
00:20:36.839 --> 00:20:39.680
appreciated in the same way. And that's where we came

383
00:20:39.720 --> 00:20:43.119
to the five languages. And money doesn't get it for

384
00:20:43.119 --> 00:20:45.480
a lot of people. It does for some people that

385
00:20:45.519 --> 00:20:48.880
are motivated that way, but the majority of the organization,

386
00:20:49.400 --> 00:20:53.039
especially if it's a bonus or a raise, we know

387
00:20:53.160 --> 00:20:55.839
that there's a short term effect, maybe two months, that

388
00:20:56.000 --> 00:20:58.079
it might impact them. But after that it sort of

389
00:20:58.119 --> 00:21:01.039
fades into the background and life is regular again and

390
00:21:01.079 --> 00:21:03.160
they're just back to normal.

391
00:21:04.640 --> 00:21:07.039
Excellent. So what I'd look to do next is just

392
00:21:07.279 --> 00:21:09.440
take a tour of the five languages here and kind

393
00:21:09.480 --> 00:21:11.160
of bring them to life and give some examples so

394
00:21:11.200 --> 00:21:13.559
our listeners and viewers understand what that looks like in action,

395
00:21:14.279 --> 00:21:15.960
and maybe as they go along they might start to

396
00:21:15.960 --> 00:21:18.559
identify which one seems more like them or their preference.

397
00:21:19.200 --> 00:21:20.559
And then after we do that that, I think we

398
00:21:20.599 --> 00:21:22.960
have room to talk more about just why I think

399
00:21:22.960 --> 00:21:26.000
we can bring home why their recognition programs don't work

400
00:21:26.039 --> 00:21:27.880
when we start to distinguish them with the numbers of

401
00:21:27.920 --> 00:21:31.640
the preferred languages as we go, especially tangible gifts. So

402
00:21:31.720 --> 00:21:34.200
let's start with words of affirmation. Can you bring that

403
00:21:34.240 --> 00:21:35.720
one to life for us? And I know this is

404
00:21:35.759 --> 00:21:38.559
the one where this is the preferred way that most

405
00:21:38.559 --> 00:21:42.400
people identify as their preferred language of appreciation in the workplace.

406
00:21:43.079 --> 00:21:47.640
That's true, but unfortunately I think our culture and leaders

407
00:21:47.799 --> 00:21:53.240
over emphasize it because over fifty percent of people choose

408
00:21:53.240 --> 00:21:55.799
a language other than words, and so if you only

409
00:21:55.920 --> 00:21:59.000
use words, you're missing over fifty percent of your team members.

410
00:21:59.640 --> 00:22:00.599
Right now, we've got.

411
00:22:00.599 --> 00:22:04.839
New data that we've calculated that forty four percent of

412
00:22:04.880 --> 00:22:10.720
the workforce chooses words as their primary language. And one

413
00:22:10.759 --> 00:22:14.519
of the things is that we've learned is that statements

414
00:22:14.599 --> 00:22:18.799
like good job, glad you're part of a team, way

415
00:22:18.839 --> 00:22:22.160
to go. It just bounces off their forehead. I mean,

416
00:22:22.200 --> 00:22:27.160
it just has no way. And you have to be specific.

417
00:22:27.200 --> 00:22:29.400
And we teach a model of you know, use a

418
00:22:29.400 --> 00:22:31.519
person's name. We like to hear your name. If you're

419
00:22:31.519 --> 00:22:35.720
writing it, please spell it correctly, and then be specific

420
00:22:35.759 --> 00:22:38.200
about what you value about them, and it can be

421
00:22:38.240 --> 00:22:39.960
about their work and what they've done.

422
00:22:39.880 --> 00:22:41.920
That you know, they got their reports that are on time.

423
00:22:42.680 --> 00:22:45.680
But third piece that's really important is to tell them

424
00:22:45.960 --> 00:22:49.440
and communicate why it's important either to you, to the

425
00:22:49.559 --> 00:22:53.640
organization or to the clients. You know, forging, you know, Sylvia,

426
00:22:53.640 --> 00:22:56.759
thanks for getting your reports in on time. To me

427
00:22:57.079 --> 00:22:59.400
that way, I have a little bit of leading way

428
00:22:59.559 --> 00:23:02.559
to build to pull all the reports together and get

429
00:23:02.599 --> 00:23:04.920
it out to my boss on time as well. So

430
00:23:05.359 --> 00:23:07.880
it's really important to do that. And there's different kinds

431
00:23:08.680 --> 00:23:12.000
actions with each language words. It can be one on

432
00:23:12.000 --> 00:23:14.640
one that's sort of the most common way, but it

433
00:23:14.640 --> 00:23:16.759
could be in a small group or you know a

434
00:23:16.799 --> 00:23:20.440
team zoom, meaning that you call out somebody that really

435
00:23:20.519 --> 00:23:23.680
served one of their clients. Well, one of the things

436
00:23:23.680 --> 00:23:28.440
we know that about forty percent of the workforce doesn't

437
00:23:28.519 --> 00:23:31.039
like to go up in front of the group a

438
00:23:31.119 --> 00:23:33.839
large group to be recognized, and it's actually a negative

439
00:23:33.880 --> 00:23:34.240
for them.

440
00:23:34.279 --> 00:23:37.400
So you sort of gone cross purposes for that.

441
00:23:39.960 --> 00:23:44.799
And then also written communication is helpful for introverts that

442
00:23:45.440 --> 00:23:48.720
especially giving it that they get really anxious about sort

443
00:23:48.759 --> 00:23:52.039
of talking to somebody directly and being able to send

444
00:23:52.119 --> 00:23:54.599
a text or an email or write a card is

445
00:23:55.640 --> 00:23:57.240
more comfortable for them.

446
00:23:57.960 --> 00:24:01.039
Beautiful, beautifully articulated to Paul, one thing I'd like to

447
00:24:01.079 --> 00:24:03.839
do is map over what you said about when you help,

448
00:24:04.079 --> 00:24:07.960
you give the words of affirmation and you share why

449
00:24:08.200 --> 00:24:10.720
or how the contribution was important and how it made

450
00:24:10.720 --> 00:24:13.279
a difference to the person's work. Now where you're in

451
00:24:13.279 --> 00:24:15.920
the space of what we call mattering, and mattering has

452
00:24:15.960 --> 00:24:19.559
become a tremendous area to distinguish and help organizations to

453
00:24:19.680 --> 00:24:23.559
really help people feel like they are valued and appreciate.

454
00:24:23.599 --> 00:24:25.119
So I just wanted to put that together for listeners

455
00:24:25.119 --> 00:24:26.319
and viewers who have been listening to the show for

456
00:24:26.359 --> 00:24:28.839
a while. They probably made that connection already. The new

457
00:24:28.839 --> 00:24:30.839
people maybe haven't yet, So I just wanted to thread

458
00:24:30.880 --> 00:24:35.160
that little needle there together. It's just gorgeous, right, Okay,

459
00:24:35.200 --> 00:24:37.640
So let's talk about the second language, quality time. And

460
00:24:37.720 --> 00:24:40.359
let me just say here, that's interesting. I took your

461
00:24:40.359 --> 00:24:43.319
assessment and I did discovering the workplace. Quality time's my

462
00:24:43.440 --> 00:24:46.839
preferred language of appreciation, and that is both within with

463
00:24:46.920 --> 00:24:49.359
my team and also with the really sacred work I

464
00:24:49.359 --> 00:24:51.640
get to do with organization leaders. And so that was

465
00:24:51.680 --> 00:24:53.920
helpful for me to I have thought it was just

466
00:24:53.960 --> 00:24:57.000
words of affirmation, So I really appreciate that. Now it

467
00:24:57.039 --> 00:24:58.839
makes much more sense as to where I get my

468
00:24:58.920 --> 00:24:59.599
juice in my gym.

469
00:25:00.160 --> 00:25:02.559
You talk to Paul, you bet, you bet? Yeah.

470
00:25:02.680 --> 00:25:05.799
Quality time is an an interesting one in that we've

471
00:25:05.880 --> 00:25:09.519
learned that it really differs according to generation as far

472
00:25:09.559 --> 00:25:12.799
as the age and stage of the worker.

473
00:25:12.880 --> 00:25:14.960
That for those of us that are older like being

474
00:25:15.640 --> 00:25:16.400
quality time.

475
00:25:17.440 --> 00:25:20.839
We learned that it was really about valuing time with

476
00:25:20.920 --> 00:25:23.880
our manager or supervisor, because time is really one of

477
00:25:23.960 --> 00:25:28.640
our most precious commodities, either in them giving instruction or

478
00:25:28.839 --> 00:25:31.400
just some focus and listening to us.

479
00:25:31.519 --> 00:25:32.640
Or hearing our ideas.

480
00:25:33.039 --> 00:25:36.799
But for younger workers, I tell leaders, just because you

481
00:25:36.799 --> 00:25:39.000
have a team member that has quality time as their language,

482
00:25:39.079 --> 00:25:41.519
doesn't mean they want time with you. Okay, you may

483
00:25:41.559 --> 00:25:44.880
be wonderful, you may be great, but they really want

484
00:25:45.279 --> 00:25:48.160
to hang out with their peers and go to lunch,

485
00:25:48.279 --> 00:25:51.519
go out after work and so and this is one

486
00:25:51.519 --> 00:25:53.480
of the barriers that a lot of people would say, oh,

487
00:25:53.480 --> 00:25:55.119
I don't have time to spend time with every way,

488
00:25:55.160 --> 00:25:57.799
Well you don't have to because they don't want to

489
00:25:57.839 --> 00:25:59.400
spend time with you necessarily.

490
00:26:00.400 --> 00:26:03.559
And that's where in our inventory we not only.

491
00:26:03.359 --> 00:26:07.359
Identify the language, but the specific actions and from whom

492
00:26:07.440 --> 00:26:10.759
you want them, so you get really sort of granular

493
00:26:11.279 --> 00:26:15.799
and so it's but it's twenty six percent of the

494
00:26:16.240 --> 00:26:19.319
populations of about one about or eighty four people value

495
00:26:19.400 --> 00:26:24.759
quality time. And you know you can if usually you

496
00:26:24.799 --> 00:26:26.920
compare it with words or whatever, and that sort of

497
00:26:27.920 --> 00:26:31.680
multiplies effect. But it's an important piece to know that,

498
00:26:31.839 --> 00:26:35.119
just you know, walking by and giving a word of

499
00:26:35.160 --> 00:26:37.039
praises and going to cut it for a lot of people.

500
00:26:38.039 --> 00:26:40.039
Another thing that I think really helped, which also I

501
00:26:40.079 --> 00:26:43.400
could really really relate to and be affirmed by, is

502
00:26:43.920 --> 00:26:51.160
part of using the quality quality time. Preferred language shows

503
00:26:51.240 --> 00:26:55.119
up in like quality conversations, quality discussions. You know, so

504
00:26:55.160 --> 00:26:58.359
this is at a quality exchange. You know, you're taking

505
00:26:58.400 --> 00:27:02.759
time to share your thoughts, vulnerable sharing your thoughts. That's

506
00:27:03.079 --> 00:27:04.839
that for me is if you know, I always had

507
00:27:05.160 --> 00:27:06.920
a saying what I you know, as I called your life,

508
00:27:06.920 --> 00:27:09.039
which was terrible in the whole dating world, but it

509
00:27:09.160 --> 00:27:11.119
was if you're not going to share your soul with me,

510
00:27:11.279 --> 00:27:15.279
to waste my time? You know? Okay, see, I gotta go.

511
00:27:17.599 --> 00:27:21.079
It was a nice weed out factor, Paul. Anyway, Okay,

512
00:27:21.119 --> 00:27:24.720
So number three appreciation language is acts of service. Let's

513
00:27:24.759 --> 00:27:25.680
talk about that one.

514
00:27:25.920 --> 00:27:26.960
Yeah, acts of service.

515
00:27:27.359 --> 00:27:32.759
It's not rescuing low performing colleagues. It's these people live by.

516
00:27:32.839 --> 00:27:36.279
It's sort of the mantra that don't tell me you

517
00:27:36.279 --> 00:27:37.400
support me, show me.

518
00:27:38.480 --> 00:27:39.359
Words are cheap.

519
00:27:39.920 --> 00:27:44.279
And so it's twenty percent so one about eary five colleagues,

520
00:27:45.480 --> 00:27:48.759
and it's it's really interesting that it doesn't take a lot.

521
00:27:49.240 --> 00:27:54.039
It's sort of it's important to understand what kind of

522
00:27:54.079 --> 00:27:57.799
help they want. And also if we ask people say, hey,

523
00:27:57.799 --> 00:28:01.319
would you like some help our culture, the normal response

524
00:28:01.480 --> 00:28:04.319
is no, I'm good, you know, and so you have

525
00:28:04.400 --> 00:28:05.519
to sort of push through that.

526
00:28:05.880 --> 00:28:07.720
But two the most.

527
00:28:07.440 --> 00:28:11.440
Common contexts are when you're working on a time deadline.

528
00:28:11.480 --> 00:28:14.319
You have got to get something done, and what's something

529
00:28:14.400 --> 00:28:16.759
somebody can do to help you out, whether that's maybe

530
00:28:16.799 --> 00:28:19.079
take part of your daily work so that you can

531
00:28:19.119 --> 00:28:22.319
focus on the project, or.

532
00:28:22.200 --> 00:28:23.960
Maybe delegate a piece to them.

533
00:28:24.240 --> 00:28:29.319
And the other common context is when in a service industry,

534
00:28:29.359 --> 00:28:31.440
maybe in a dentist office, a whole bunch of them

535
00:28:31.440 --> 00:28:32.559
will show up all at once.

536
00:28:32.599 --> 00:28:34.160
Of the receptionist ask.

537
00:28:34.160 --> 00:28:37.920
And she can't, you know, greet all of them or

538
00:28:37.920 --> 00:28:40.599
assign them in you know, maybe the office mander whose

539
00:28:40.839 --> 00:28:44.000
job isn't to do this, you know, helps out to

540
00:28:44.079 --> 00:28:49.000
get past that sort of stale stale maid and clog up.

541
00:28:49.319 --> 00:28:53.079
So it really is important.

542
00:28:53.119 --> 00:28:57.480
It doesn't take a lot for them. You don't have

543
00:28:57.519 --> 00:29:01.480
to do it repeatedly like every time. Just pay attention

544
00:29:01.759 --> 00:29:08.359
and they really light up and they respond by loyalty,

545
00:29:08.480 --> 00:29:10.519
I mean, they are ready to sort of go to

546
00:29:10.559 --> 00:29:11.680
war with you if.

547
00:29:11.519 --> 00:29:12.720
You help out when they need it.

548
00:29:13.839 --> 00:29:15.880
A couple of additional things I wanted to pepper in

549
00:29:15.880 --> 00:29:17.759
there that I thought were very very powerful in your

550
00:29:17.759 --> 00:29:21.039
book that help help us understand how to meet a

551
00:29:21.079 --> 00:29:23.680
person who has this preferred language is one win when

552
00:29:23.680 --> 00:29:26.559
you offer to help them that that now wouldn't be

553
00:29:26.640 --> 00:29:28.160
the time when you ask them, you know, what would

554
00:29:28.160 --> 00:29:31.680
be helpful, specifically, how would you like the tasks done?

555
00:29:31.680 --> 00:29:33.079
And they tell you how they want the test, and

556
00:29:33.160 --> 00:29:35.559
that that is not your time to tell them, you

557
00:29:35.599 --> 00:29:37.279
know there's a better way to do it, and let

558
00:29:37.319 --> 00:29:38.920
me show you what it is. Right, That is not

559
00:29:39.000 --> 00:29:41.160
the time to be doing any coaching. Right, we're going

560
00:29:41.160 --> 00:29:43.480
to do an active service for somebody. You do the

561
00:29:43.519 --> 00:29:45.039
task and the way that they want you to. And

562
00:29:45.160 --> 00:29:49.200
the other important thing is when would be best to

563
00:29:49.200 --> 00:29:51.440
help and that you make sure that you finish the task.

564
00:29:51.480 --> 00:29:53.160
You don't leave it hanging out there. If you're going

565
00:29:53.200 --> 00:29:55.359
to do an active service, you've got to fully come

566
00:29:55.400 --> 00:29:56.480
through for the other person.

567
00:29:57.119 --> 00:30:02.119
Yes, absolutely, you know, and doing it their way is

568
00:30:02.160 --> 00:30:05.400
really important. I was working with a group of inner

569
00:30:05.400 --> 00:30:09.920
city schools and the administrative assistants said, you know, we

570
00:30:10.079 --> 00:30:12.799
tell the principle to quit moving our piles. We do

571
00:30:12.920 --> 00:30:14.960
things by piles and if you want to come out

572
00:30:15.000 --> 00:30:17.480
and it was just messing things up and it wasn't

573
00:30:17.480 --> 00:30:18.079
helpful at all.

574
00:30:19.319 --> 00:30:22.839
Yeah, perfect example. Well, let's grab our last break because

575
00:30:22.880 --> 00:30:24.880
I want to cover the last two languages here, but

576
00:30:24.920 --> 00:30:27.640
I want to nuance them specifically, So let's go ahead

577
00:30:27.640 --> 00:30:28.480
and cut for our break.

578
00:30:28.519 --> 00:30:28.759
Now.

579
00:30:29.240 --> 00:30:31.279
I'm your host, doctor at Last Cortes. We were on

580
00:30:31.319 --> 00:30:34.359
the air with doctor Paul White, who is the co

581
00:30:34.440 --> 00:30:38.440
author of the Five Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace.

582
00:30:38.759 --> 00:30:41.240
We've been talking about a few of the of the

583
00:30:41.319 --> 00:30:43.160
languages here. After the break, we're going to talk about

584
00:30:43.160 --> 00:30:44.519
the last two. We'll be right back.

585
00:31:00.480 --> 00:31:04.039
Doctor Elise Cortes is a management consultant specializing in meaning

586
00:31:04.079 --> 00:31:07.920
and purpose. An inspirational speaker and author, she helps companies

587
00:31:08.000 --> 00:31:11.799
visioneer for greater purpose among stakeholders and develop purpose inspired

588
00:31:11.880 --> 00:31:15.839
leadership and meaning infused cultures that elevate fulfillment, performance, and

589
00:31:15.920 --> 00:31:19.160
commitment within the workforce. To learn more or to invite

590
00:31:19.160 --> 00:31:22.160
Elise to speak to your organization, please visit her at

591
00:31:22.160 --> 00:31:25.400
elisecortes dot com. Let's talk about how to get your

592
00:31:25.440 --> 00:31:34.240
employees working on purpose. This is working on Purpose with

593
00:31:34.359 --> 00:31:37.519
doctor Elise Cortes. To reach our program today or to

594
00:31:37.599 --> 00:31:40.680
open a conversation with Elise, send an email to Elise

595
00:31:40.960 --> 00:31:47.039
ALISEE at elisecortes dot com. Now back to working on Purpose.

596
00:31:51.680 --> 00:31:53.480
Thanks you Jane with us, and welcome back to Working

597
00:31:53.519 --> 00:31:56.079
on Purpose. I'm your host, doctor Release Cortes. As you

598
00:31:56.079 --> 00:31:58.160
know by now, this program is dedicated to empowering and

599
00:31:58.200 --> 00:32:00.319
inspiring you along your journey to real life more of

600
00:32:00.319 --> 00:32:02.480
the potential. If you will learn more about how we

601
00:32:02.480 --> 00:32:04.720
can work together and learn about the customer Now Academy

602
00:32:04.759 --> 00:32:07.880
for leaders and individuals on various journeys alike. Make your

603
00:32:07.880 --> 00:32:10.680
way to Gusto dash now dot com and then navigate

604
00:32:10.680 --> 00:32:12.559
to the training tap to find the academy. We'd love

605
00:32:12.559 --> 00:32:14.599
to have you join us if you are just joining

606
00:32:14.640 --> 00:32:16.519
us today. My guest is doctor Paul White. He is

607
00:32:16.559 --> 00:32:19.519
the co author of the Five Languages of Appreciation in Workplace,

608
00:32:19.880 --> 00:32:25.599
empowering organizations by encouraging people. So the next language of

609
00:32:25.640 --> 00:32:29.039
appreciation is tangible gifts. And I've really found this really

610
00:32:29.039 --> 00:32:32.640
really interesting. And you have all chapter on blind spots

611
00:32:32.759 --> 00:32:35.599
about you know whatever, you whatever language is your least favorite,

612
00:32:35.799 --> 00:32:38.000
probably your blind as to its power to somebody else,

613
00:32:38.319 --> 00:32:41.839
This is my least favorite. Okay, let's talk about tangible gifts.

614
00:32:42.440 --> 00:32:47.680
Yeah, tangible gifts in our model is not raises, is

615
00:32:47.720 --> 00:32:48.440
not bonuses.

616
00:32:48.440 --> 00:32:51.519
That's you know, according to the organization and management.

617
00:32:51.400 --> 00:32:54.039
It's really just small things and items that show that

618
00:32:54.079 --> 00:32:56.920
you're getting to know your colleagues as people and what

619
00:32:56.960 --> 00:33:01.359
they like. The most commonly given gift in the workplaces food,

620
00:33:02.359 --> 00:33:05.160
you know, whether that's somebody that likes to bake things

621
00:33:05.200 --> 00:33:08.359
and brings in some coffee cake, or you know, maybe

622
00:33:08.359 --> 00:33:12.559
the supervisor stops and gets some bagels or donuts. Actually,

623
00:33:12.640 --> 00:33:15.440
I'm hearing feedback that a lot of places are really

624
00:33:15.480 --> 00:33:16.920
tired of pizza for lunch.

625
00:33:18.799 --> 00:33:20.440
I want to sort of move past that.

626
00:33:21.240 --> 00:33:24.480
But also, gift cards are the second most frequently given gift,

627
00:33:25.119 --> 00:33:26.000
and it's.

628
00:33:26.599 --> 00:33:27.960
Doesn't have to be a big deal.

629
00:33:28.000 --> 00:33:30.480
I mean, in fact, we did some research and found

630
00:33:30.519 --> 00:33:32.000
out that there's two groups.

631
00:33:31.680 --> 00:33:33.240
Of people around gift cards.

632
00:33:33.240 --> 00:33:39.240
One like the sort of generic card Amazon or Visa

633
00:33:39.319 --> 00:33:42.480
gift cards, so they can you know, shop.

634
00:33:42.240 --> 00:33:43.119
For whatever they want.

635
00:33:44.000 --> 00:33:46.200
But there's a group that doesn't like those because they

636
00:33:46.200 --> 00:33:49.119
don't want to spend it on bills. They want it

637
00:33:49.160 --> 00:33:52.039
according to sort of their specialty website, whether.

638
00:33:51.880 --> 00:33:54.559
It's a bookstore or a phishing stores.

639
00:33:54.200 --> 00:33:59.599
That they can buy something that's fun and gifts while

640
00:33:59.799 --> 00:34:03.400
it's being used in employee recognition, A lot, It doesn't

641
00:34:03.440 --> 00:34:05.119
have a lot of impact laces.

642
00:34:05.119 --> 00:34:06.480
Research shows it's nine.

643
00:34:06.359 --> 00:34:09.719
Percent of employees choose that as their primary way of

644
00:34:10.079 --> 00:34:14.960
wanting to be show appreciations lower in other cultures. And because,

645
00:34:15.079 --> 00:34:18.239
I mean, if you never hear anything positive, if you

646
00:34:18.239 --> 00:34:20.199
never get any help when you need it, or nobody

647
00:34:20.239 --> 00:34:23.360
stops by seeing you, and you get a gift and

648
00:34:23.440 --> 00:34:26.519
you know that the manager you have to pay for it,

649
00:34:26.519 --> 00:34:29.480
it's from the company, it doesn't feel very you know,

650
00:34:29.599 --> 00:34:31.440
authentic and meaningful.

651
00:34:31.559 --> 00:34:36.800
So but this is where it is the thought that counts.

652
00:34:36.840 --> 00:34:39.679
It's not the amount of money that maybe they know

653
00:34:39.800 --> 00:34:42.559
that you they you know you're a Dallas Maverick fan

654
00:34:42.679 --> 00:34:46.159
and so they get you something related to that, or

655
00:34:46.280 --> 00:34:49.519
they know that you're going to plan a garden this

656
00:34:49.599 --> 00:34:52.360
spring and you've never done that before, and can get

657
00:34:52.400 --> 00:34:54.639
you a catalog or a magazine about that.

658
00:34:54.800 --> 00:34:56.039
But it can even be online.

659
00:34:56.039 --> 00:34:57.960
I mean, let's say if you're going to coach your

660
00:34:58.039 --> 00:35:01.199
kids soccer team for the first time, and this person

661
00:35:01.440 --> 00:35:05.440
has some experience, they send you a website about training activity.

662
00:35:05.559 --> 00:35:10.079
So it's just about you as a person, and it

663
00:35:10.079 --> 00:35:12.840
can be related to performance, but lots of times it's not.

664
00:35:12.920 --> 00:35:15.559
It's just sort of celebrating you and what you like.

665
00:35:15.920 --> 00:35:16.039
Mm.

666
00:35:16.679 --> 00:35:18.559
And the key there is you say so beautiful in

667
00:35:18.559 --> 00:35:20.760
the book is just the importance of you know, appreciating

668
00:35:20.760 --> 00:35:24.440
and knowing your people as individuals and taking the time

669
00:35:24.480 --> 00:35:26.679
to learn about what's important to them. That's part of

670
00:35:26.719 --> 00:35:29.639
what makes that the tangible gift meaningful to someone who

671
00:35:29.639 --> 00:35:31.079
has this preference language.

672
00:35:31.320 --> 00:35:34.679
Yeah, and giving everybody the same thing gets.

673
00:35:34.559 --> 00:35:36.119
You nowhere, right right. Yeah.

674
00:35:36.159 --> 00:35:38.079
I know many people that my standard gift is what

675
00:35:38.119 --> 00:35:41.719
I give, so okay, so I really appreciate it is

676
00:35:41.760 --> 00:35:45.119
when I give gifts, I do really try to think about, well,

677
00:35:45.159 --> 00:35:47.159
who are they, what do they care about, what matters

678
00:35:47.199 --> 00:35:48.840
to it, not what do I think they need or

679
00:35:48.840 --> 00:35:52.239
what's easiest for me to give, right, So I appreciate that. Okay.

680
00:35:52.280 --> 00:35:55.760
So now the last appreciation language is physical touch, which

681
00:35:55.920 --> 00:35:59.079
to say so candidly in your book that you had

682
00:35:59.119 --> 00:36:01.000
left out for some peer time in your assessment and

683
00:36:01.000 --> 00:36:03.440
then I think you've got some pushback and such, and

684
00:36:03.480 --> 00:36:06.280
it's powerful, I can tell you. For me, doctor Paul,

685
00:36:06.320 --> 00:36:09.079
I use touch a lot. It's I lived in Brazil

686
00:36:09.119 --> 00:36:11.239
for two years. Part of the reason why company is

687
00:36:11.239 --> 00:36:14.920
called Gusto now is because it honors the vibrancy, the passion,

688
00:36:14.960 --> 00:36:18.000
the expression of those you know, Latino cultures under in

689
00:36:18.079 --> 00:36:20.920
Spain as well. Touch is a really important part of

690
00:36:21.000 --> 00:36:24.039
living in those cultures. Absolutely, and when I'm doing workshops,

691
00:36:24.079 --> 00:36:26.400
I do you know, I'm careful, I notice you know,

692
00:36:26.440 --> 00:36:29.239
who can I touch on the shoulder or whatever. But

693
00:36:29.400 --> 00:36:31.920
let's talk about physical touch in the workplace.

694
00:36:33.000 --> 00:36:36.039
Yeah, it's really an issue in the US in some

695
00:36:36.119 --> 00:36:38.480
parts of Western Europe, whereas in.

696
00:36:38.480 --> 00:36:40.880
Other parts of the world it's not an issue.

697
00:36:40.960 --> 00:36:45.440
And as we work in multicultural organizations and even within

698
00:36:45.480 --> 00:36:50.239
the US among the largely Hispanic community, touch is important

699
00:36:50.320 --> 00:36:53.920
and if you don't touch, it feels very cold and objective.

700
00:36:55.960 --> 00:37:01.719
And really it's it's what we've found his spontaneous celebration

701
00:37:01.880 --> 00:37:04.199
in the workplace, and it's it's a high five when

702
00:37:04.239 --> 00:37:06.800
you reach a goal, or a fist bump, when you

703
00:37:06.800 --> 00:37:10.760
solve a problem, maybe a congratuatory handshake, or when somebody's

704
00:37:10.800 --> 00:37:15.159
you know, just found out that you know, their husband's

705
00:37:15.280 --> 00:37:17.119
in a car accident, he's in the hospital. I mean

706
00:37:17.400 --> 00:37:21.559
Anne on the shoulder or sidehok, you know, is appropriate,

707
00:37:21.800 --> 00:37:24.920
depending on the relationship. It's always the recipient who decides

708
00:37:24.960 --> 00:37:29.440
what's appropriate. But uh, it's I think it's becoming less

709
00:37:31.119 --> 00:37:34.719
I don't know, toxic than maybe it was the Northeast still,

710
00:37:34.760 --> 00:37:36.880
I mean, you know in New York you know you

711
00:37:36.920 --> 00:37:41.519
don't you know, Yeah, it's checking in here for weapons,

712
00:37:41.559 --> 00:37:43.440
you know. I mean, it's just it's it's not part

713
00:37:43.480 --> 00:37:47.679
of the culture. But I think it can be very

714
00:37:47.679 --> 00:37:51.760
meaningful in appropriate uh, and healthy relationships.

715
00:37:52.800 --> 00:37:55.679
Now you know, I can tell you for you know,

716
00:37:56.280 --> 00:37:59.119
Languages of Love, the original Doctor Gary Chapman book. That

717
00:37:59.440 --> 00:38:02.119
book is also based on for me, words of affirmation

718
00:38:02.239 --> 00:38:06.039
is also important for those kinds of relationships, but just quickly,

719
00:38:06.119 --> 00:38:08.280
just to distinguish and the culture thing is so beautiful.

720
00:38:08.719 --> 00:38:11.639
When I lived in Spain, what the Spaniards taught me

721
00:38:11.679 --> 00:38:14.679
and gave to me was I learned the power of relationships.

722
00:38:14.679 --> 00:38:18.079
When I lived in Spain, everybody's kissing talk about physical touch.

723
00:38:18.119 --> 00:38:20.920
Everybody's kissing it. It's beautiful. And as an American like,

724
00:38:20.960 --> 00:38:25.159
what is that public? Your PDAs? And then living in Brazil,

725
00:38:25.920 --> 00:38:28.599
you know the language of touch. You know, you really

726
00:38:28.679 --> 00:38:31.480
can't really have a conversation with somebody without touching them.

727
00:38:31.480 --> 00:38:34.559
It's just not effective. And women and when we sit

728
00:38:34.639 --> 00:38:37.159
and talk together as women, we are oftentimes stroking each

729
00:38:37.159 --> 00:38:39.719
other's face or touching each other's hair. It's that kind

730
00:38:39.760 --> 00:38:42.480
of level of touch. I had to unlearn all that,

731
00:38:42.559 --> 00:38:44.880
doctor Paul, when I came back to the States, because

732
00:38:45.159 --> 00:38:47.559
you know, people misinterpreted that or they were offended by it,

733
00:38:47.599 --> 00:38:50.239
and anyway, just to distinguish, you know, this idea of

734
00:38:50.320 --> 00:38:53.280
touch and the nuance and levels of how people interpret touch.

735
00:38:53.440 --> 00:38:53.800
Just to know that.

736
00:38:54.000 --> 00:38:56.960
And you also, I mean the Asian cultures primarily, I

737
00:38:56.960 --> 00:38:59.920
mean in Japan for sure. I mean a handshake is

738
00:39:00.079 --> 00:39:02.719
about the only physical touch that happens in the business

739
00:39:02.719 --> 00:39:06.480
context there. So you have to be culturally aware. But

740
00:39:07.000 --> 00:39:11.920
I think we're loosening up a little bit appropriately in

741
00:39:11.960 --> 00:39:12.800
the workplace here.

742
00:39:13.199 --> 00:39:15.760
Yeah. Well, that's where we're out to create cultures of gusto.

743
00:39:15.880 --> 00:39:18.400
So we don't need to necessarily have public displays of

744
00:39:18.400 --> 00:39:20.559
affection all the time and help right hands on everybody,

745
00:39:20.599 --> 00:39:22.519
but we definitely want to see vibrancy and passion and

746
00:39:22.559 --> 00:39:26.159
expression and certainly appreciation. So you and I are locked

747
00:39:26.239 --> 00:39:29.639
arm in arm, doctor, don't get away now. Yeah, okay,

748
00:39:29.639 --> 00:39:31.440
so let's talk a little bit here in our last

749
00:39:31.519 --> 00:39:34.280
few minutes here, I'd love to help have our listeners

750
00:39:34.280 --> 00:39:38.119
and viewers better understand how you've helped organizations implement a

751
00:39:38.159 --> 00:39:40.360
culture of appreciation. How do you do your work?

752
00:39:40.800 --> 00:39:43.679
Yeah, you know, it's been interesting over time because I

753
00:39:43.760 --> 00:39:48.039
mean we've been doing this fifteen plus years and started

754
00:39:48.039 --> 00:39:52.039
with some very small organizations, typically and or like a department.

755
00:39:52.280 --> 00:39:57.440
And often what we do is somebody finds our material

756
00:39:57.519 --> 00:40:01.079
and finds it interesting and the and we sort of

757
00:40:01.119 --> 00:40:04.800
help them do a pilot study versus trying to get

758
00:40:04.800 --> 00:40:06.360
the whole organization to do that.

759
00:40:06.639 --> 00:40:08.719
We will go across a whole organization.

760
00:40:08.360 --> 00:40:12.000
But it's rarely you know, top down across the way.

761
00:40:12.039 --> 00:40:16.760
It's more piece by piece where we find somebody who's

762
00:40:16.800 --> 00:40:21.559
interested and we have them take our online assessment. Over time,

763
00:40:21.599 --> 00:40:27.960
we've developed about fifteen industry specific versions because the languages

764
00:40:28.000 --> 00:40:33.280
seem to be relevant almost in the same proportions across industries,

765
00:40:33.519 --> 00:40:36.159
but the actions are different. So like an active service

766
00:40:36.400 --> 00:40:38.920
to a nurse is different than an active service to

767
00:40:38.960 --> 00:40:41.800
a public school teacher, to a carpenter, and so we

768
00:40:42.000 --> 00:40:46.559
specify and help people get specific what they want done

769
00:40:46.719 --> 00:40:49.639
or what kind of time they want and so forth.

770
00:40:50.079 --> 00:40:51.079
And then.

771
00:40:53.039 --> 00:40:54.880
Because I grew up in the non for profit work.

772
00:40:54.880 --> 00:40:58.880
I wanted to create a low cost training materials and

773
00:40:58.920 --> 00:41:02.039
so we have Appreciation Training Kit costs not quite a

774
00:41:02.119 --> 00:41:05.079
thousand dollars, but you can use it multiple times.

775
00:41:04.840 --> 00:41:07.480
With different groups. And it's you know.

776
00:41:07.760 --> 00:41:14.000
Videos, instructional videos, it's handouts, its slides, it's a facilitator's

777
00:41:14.000 --> 00:41:16.719
guide that just walks you through the activities and all

778
00:41:16.760 --> 00:41:20.440
that takes about a half day and we've taken hundreds

779
00:41:20.480 --> 00:41:25.320
and thousands of teams through that, and we have people

780
00:41:25.840 --> 00:41:28.719
can sort of get trained and do it internally, or

781
00:41:28.760 --> 00:41:33.079
we have you know, a bank of facilitators I don't know,

782
00:41:33.880 --> 00:41:36.719
fifteen hundred or so across the world that they can

783
00:41:36.840 --> 00:41:39.280
use if they want to do that. And so it's

784
00:41:39.639 --> 00:41:42.360
really getting small groups together to talk about it and

785
00:41:42.519 --> 00:41:47.440
learn about how each other view appreciation and how they

786
00:41:47.480 --> 00:41:50.159
don't want it and start to apply it.

787
00:41:51.159 --> 00:41:53.159
No, so appreciate that. And you said this at the

788
00:41:53.199 --> 00:41:55.840
beginning of our conversation about when you make the assessment

789
00:41:55.880 --> 00:41:58.960
to be able to anybody, And there's something powerful about learning

790
00:41:59.000 --> 00:42:01.920
about yourself, right, just giving people the opportunity to learn,

791
00:42:02.000 --> 00:42:04.760
Oh this is important. Oh that's why that's why I

792
00:42:04.800 --> 00:42:08.760
respond to this so so powerful, right, and then you know,

793
00:42:08.800 --> 00:42:11.559
being able to equip the manager and the colleagues with

794
00:42:11.599 --> 00:42:14.320
that knowledge is just so powerful. And you know, even

795
00:42:14.360 --> 00:42:15.760
in just some of the work that I do helping

796
00:42:15.840 --> 00:42:19.760
organizations identify the individual values of the organization and of

797
00:42:19.920 --> 00:42:22.360
that of the of the organization as well as its purpose,

798
00:42:23.000 --> 00:42:25.840
I can there's spends so many times when I've done

799
00:42:25.920 --> 00:42:29.039
these programs, and I remember just one one instance where

800
00:42:29.760 --> 00:42:32.280
a woman I'd done some work for a law firm

801
00:42:32.320 --> 00:42:35.360
here in Dallas, and one of the women who was

802
00:42:35.559 --> 00:42:37.880
she was an administrative asistant who had been called back

803
00:42:37.920 --> 00:42:40.360
from retirement to come back into the into the office

804
00:42:40.360 --> 00:42:43.639
to work. Her number one value is kindness, And I said,

805
00:42:43.679 --> 00:42:46.199
does your boss know that that's your number one value?

806
00:42:46.719 --> 00:42:50.360
She put her head down in tearstream down her face. Yeah, no,

807
00:42:50.519 --> 00:42:53.639
most most certainly he doesn't know, right, But I said,

808
00:42:53.760 --> 00:42:56.639
what would happened do you suppose if you did know? Anyway?

809
00:42:56.679 --> 00:42:58.599
So I just really want to celebrate what you're doing.

810
00:42:58.639 --> 00:43:01.760
It's just such a powerful and really in many ways,

811
00:43:01.760 --> 00:43:05.719
you know, foundational way to really start to elevate the

812
00:43:05.800 --> 00:43:08.480
relationships in the workplace where we spend most of our day.

813
00:43:09.639 --> 00:43:12.559
Yeah, and we have new research coming out all the time.

814
00:43:13.320 --> 00:43:16.280
We do research, but now more and more people in research.

815
00:43:16.400 --> 00:43:21.119
Study came out in the twenty twenty five from Malaysia

816
00:43:21.440 --> 00:43:29.199
that found that combining employee recognition with authentic appreciation had

817
00:43:29.880 --> 00:43:32.920
a greater effect than either by itself, right, because you

818
00:43:32.960 --> 00:43:36.000
can sort of motivate people who are motivated this way,

819
00:43:36.039 --> 00:43:42.400
but support and encourage people through appreciation and encouragement through

820
00:43:42.400 --> 00:43:45.400
the five languages, and the impact is greater.

821
00:43:45.920 --> 00:43:46.400
And so.

822
00:43:47.840 --> 00:43:53.840
I mean PepsiCo, Caterpillar, Mercedes Beens, others are combining what

823
00:43:53.880 --> 00:43:57.519
we're doing with their employee recognition are syst and costs

824
00:43:57.519 --> 00:43:59.880
as much because we're not giving away a bunch of stuff,

825
00:44:00.159 --> 00:44:05.280
but it's impactful. And also because with AI, with a

826
00:44:05.320 --> 00:44:08.559
lot of different kinds of things, people are feeling pretty

827
00:44:08.599 --> 00:44:14.000
disconnected at a personal level, and this provides sort of

828
00:44:14.039 --> 00:44:17.559
a channel for people to connect at a meaningful way.

829
00:44:18.039 --> 00:44:20.039
Well, the other thing too that you're doing, which I

830
00:44:20.079 --> 00:44:22.719
do through my work too, is now you've equipped those

831
00:44:22.719 --> 00:44:25.880
individuals and now they know something about appreciation, and then

832
00:44:25.880 --> 00:44:28.559
they go home with that knowledge and now they can

833
00:44:28.599 --> 00:44:31.320
start to bring that home into those personal relationships and

834
00:44:31.320 --> 00:44:33.960
now things get better. At home. So I love that

835
00:44:34.039 --> 00:44:36.119
whole ripple of effect, which is a big reason I

836
00:44:36.159 --> 00:44:38.159
keep doing the work that I do, which brings me

837
00:44:38.199 --> 00:44:40.639
to my next question. I want to be doing this

838
00:44:40.760 --> 00:44:43.559
work that I do, doctor Paul, where we're really helping

839
00:44:43.639 --> 00:44:46.719
to transform individual leaders and organizations, if I didn't believe

840
00:44:46.800 --> 00:44:50.760
and didn't revere the wonderful power of growth, the possibility

841
00:44:50.760 --> 00:44:53.960
of growth, of reaching for our higher potential. And so

842
00:44:54.079 --> 00:44:56.400
for me, it's such sacred work to get to do

843
00:44:56.440 --> 00:44:59.280
work with leaders where you're in that sacred personal intimate

844
00:44:59.280 --> 00:45:00.920
space with them, help and them grow and learn and

845
00:45:00.920 --> 00:45:04.480
face their demons, their mindset, limitations, et cetera. So I'd

846
00:45:04.480 --> 00:45:06.639
love to have you share an example of a leader

847
00:45:06.679 --> 00:45:09.199
that you have worked with along the way who was

848
00:45:09.239 --> 00:45:12.639
initially resistant to the idea of appreciation but saw some

849
00:45:12.719 --> 00:45:14.159
great results when they did implement it.

850
00:45:15.119 --> 00:45:18.639
And you know, we had had an article written about

851
00:45:18.639 --> 00:45:22.159
our work in the New York Times with a mining

852
00:45:22.480 --> 00:45:26.400
company in South Dakota and Colorado, and it was interesting

853
00:45:26.480 --> 00:45:29.199
that the top leadership was a femily owned business. The

854
00:45:29.199 --> 00:45:32.639
top leadership they found our resources and they wanted to

855
00:45:32.639 --> 00:45:33.199
bring us in.

856
00:45:34.159 --> 00:45:37.559
And you know, a mining company with miners and truck.

857
00:45:37.400 --> 00:45:41.880
Drivers and concrete you know people, it's not the group

858
00:45:41.920 --> 00:45:43.840
that you think, oh, this is the touchy feeling group

859
00:45:43.840 --> 00:45:44.559
that's going to want.

860
00:45:44.480 --> 00:45:46.599
To do this, and so there was resistance.

861
00:45:46.599 --> 00:45:51.079
But when they heard what we were doing in the

862
00:45:51.199 --> 00:45:55.159
in the focus on authenticity and that we encourage it.

863
00:45:55.159 --> 00:45:58.199
If you don't if you're having an our time appreciating somebody,

864
00:45:58.199 --> 00:46:00.400
don't try to fake it. You know, that's going to

865
00:46:00.800 --> 00:46:04.480
really undermine trust in your relationship as a whole. And

866
00:46:04.559 --> 00:46:09.360
so it was interesting to see them embrace it and

867
00:46:09.440 --> 00:46:12.239
try it out. And that's sort of an interesting I mean,

868
00:46:12.239 --> 00:46:14.519
there are people that get excited about this. So you know,

869
00:46:14.519 --> 00:46:16.960
I've heard about the language that I thought about work,

870
00:46:16.960 --> 00:46:17.679
how do you apply it?

871
00:46:18.079 --> 00:46:21.199
But then there's other people like, you know what, but

872
00:46:21.800 --> 00:46:22.320
to do.

873
00:46:22.239 --> 00:46:26.519
It within the context of relationships with people that you

874
00:46:26.519 --> 00:46:31.039
know that you work with daily, often authentic and genuine,

875
00:46:31.559 --> 00:46:35.599
and you receive appreciation in a way that's meaningful to you.

876
00:46:36.280 --> 00:46:40.559
What happened then is they started doing things like they created.

877
00:46:41.559 --> 00:46:46.119
Little symbols to put on their helmets of their own language,

878
00:46:46.559 --> 00:46:50.639
and then it became really sort of an honor to

879
00:46:50.679 --> 00:46:55.159
be able to go through the training they have a

880
00:46:55.199 --> 00:46:58.760
pretty fast turnover for people that just joined, so they

881
00:46:58.760 --> 00:47:01.719
had like a ninety day a waiting period, you know,

882
00:47:02.000 --> 00:47:05.039
and then when they could go through that, then they.

883
00:47:04.960 --> 00:47:07.039
Would go through the training and share that.

884
00:47:07.119 --> 00:47:10.320
And it's been fun to see that as well as

885
00:47:10.360 --> 00:47:12.719
other places that take it on and sort of whether

886
00:47:12.760 --> 00:47:15.920
they make t shirts or they create a gift card

887
00:47:16.599 --> 00:47:18.599
stand where people can go get cards and sort of

888
00:47:18.800 --> 00:47:20.760
adopt it into their own culture.

889
00:47:20.960 --> 00:47:22.039
It's been fun to see.

890
00:47:23.280 --> 00:47:26.559
I so appreciate that. I personally. One of the most

891
00:47:26.599 --> 00:47:28.719
cherished things that I know my work is working is

892
00:47:28.719 --> 00:47:31.039
when I get the call from the spouse saying I

893
00:47:31.039 --> 00:47:35.280
don't know what you're doing, but thank you. Yea. So

894
00:47:35.519 --> 00:47:38.280
the show goes by so fast. Actor pauls listen to

895
00:47:38.280 --> 00:47:40.760
my people around the world. What would you like to

896
00:47:40.840 --> 00:47:43.800
leave the listeners of viewers with saying about twenty seconds?

897
00:47:44.119 --> 00:47:47.880
You know, I would say, first of all, start somewhere

898
00:47:48.039 --> 00:47:51.360
with someone you know that it doesn't take a lot

899
00:47:51.400 --> 00:47:55.000
of its words, that's okay, do it privately versus in public,

900
00:47:55.519 --> 00:47:59.119
be specific, but then learn more about it. And you know,

901
00:47:59.159 --> 00:48:03.960
our website and appreciation at work dot com, and I'll

902
00:48:04.000 --> 00:48:07.239
invite people they can write me Paul at doctor Paul

903
00:48:07.360 --> 00:48:10.239
White Dr Paul White dot com. Tell them you know

904
00:48:10.320 --> 00:48:13.599
you heard on this podcast, and I'll send you a

905
00:48:13.679 --> 00:48:17.159
sample report and sample group profile too, so you can

906
00:48:17.199 --> 00:48:21.559
see what it looks like and then try it out

907
00:48:21.599 --> 00:48:25.159
with just even a small group at your workplace. So

908
00:48:25.280 --> 00:48:26.960
glad to cross paths with you, Doctor Paul.

909
00:48:27.079 --> 00:48:29.559
It's a delight to know you to learn more about

910
00:48:29.599 --> 00:48:33.840
the language of appreciation, the preferred ways of appreciation. I

911
00:48:33.960 --> 00:48:36.199
really learned a lot from your book and this conversation.

912
00:48:36.679 --> 00:48:38.679
Thank you for coming on working on purpose.

913
00:48:38.719 --> 00:48:40.079
Thanks for having me. I really enjoyed it.

914
00:48:40.840 --> 00:48:42.800
So welcome listeners and viewers. You are going to want

915
00:48:42.840 --> 00:48:44.920
to learn more about doctor Paul White, the work that

916
00:48:45.000 --> 00:48:48.159
he does as a leadership training trainer helping companies to

917
00:48:48.239 --> 00:48:51.639
improve culture, and his book The Five Languages of Appreciation

918
00:48:51.719 --> 00:48:53.960
in the Workplace. You can visit him at his personal

919
00:48:54.000 --> 00:48:57.280
site it's doctor Paul White dot com. So it's dr

920
00:48:57.760 --> 00:49:02.159
Paul White dot com, and then his business website is

921
00:49:02.199 --> 00:49:05.639
Appreciation at Work dot com. Last week, if you missed

922
00:49:05.639 --> 00:49:07.960
the Life Show, you can always catch it via recorded podcast.

923
00:49:08.000 --> 00:49:09.960
We were on the area with Ken la Zott. He's

924
00:49:10.000 --> 00:49:12.800
the founder and CEO of Emerson Consulting Group, which is

925
00:49:12.800 --> 00:49:16.079
a consulting firm helping establish thought leadership to professionals of

926
00:49:16.119 --> 00:49:19.360
all types, and also the author of Walden for Hire.

927
00:49:19.599 --> 00:49:22.840
Business Lessons from Henry David Thuaut. We talked about Threau's

928
00:49:22.960 --> 00:49:25.920
vast work experience and philosophy of work, his work as

929
00:49:25.920 --> 00:49:28.719
an entrepreneur and an inventor in his family pencil business,

930
00:49:29.039 --> 00:49:31.159
and the school he founded, all of which give us

931
00:49:31.159 --> 00:49:34.039
a fresh perspective on business today. Next week we'll be

932
00:49:34.079 --> 00:49:38.639
on the air with Yadira Caro. She's an organizational psychological

933
00:49:39.000 --> 00:49:43.280
practitioner and coach, talking about her book Hardcore Soft Skills,

934
00:49:43.599 --> 00:49:45.119
a Guide to Working with Humans.

935
00:49:45.239 --> 00:49:45.519
See you.

936
00:49:45.519 --> 00:49:48.440
Then, let's continue learning and leaning into how to discover

937
00:49:48.519 --> 00:49:51.480
how to elevate the operating system as a leader, becoming

938
00:49:51.519 --> 00:49:55.599
inspirational and create destination workplaces where legendary business takes place.

939
00:49:55.920 --> 00:49:57.000
Let's work on Purpose.

940
00:50:00.239 --> 00:50:02.880
We hope you've enjoyed this week's program. Be sure to

941
00:50:02.920 --> 00:50:06.599
tune into Working on Purpose featuring your host, doctor Elise Cortes,

942
00:50:06.719 --> 00:50:10.039
each week on W four CY. Together we'll create a

943
00:50:10.039 --> 00:50:14.679
world where business operates conscientiously. Leadership inspires and passion, performance

944
00:50:14.760 --> 00:50:17.519
and employees are fulfilled in work that provides the meaning

945
00:50:17.559 --> 00:50:21.360
and purpose. They crave see you there. Let's work on purpose.